Joe Arpaio Is Trump Pick For Mexico Wall Warden

Fountain Hills, Arizona -(satireworld.com) The ex-Maricopa County sheriff is reported to be first in line for the $500,000 per annum position of keeping Mexicans out of the USA. At 85-years old the Fountain Hills maverick veteran lawman is also bookies’ 5/4 favorite for the controversial Trump Mexican border wall enforcement appointment due to a slew […]

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White House Hires Baseball Legend Ty Cobb To Answer Russian Involvement Charges

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) President Donald Trump announced on Saturday that baseball great Ty Cobb would immediately serve as special counsel at the White House in response to ridiculous claims of Trump Russian involvement in the 2016 election.

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Antarctica Ice Berg Breakoff Spells Climate Change For California

Los Angeles, CA – (SatireWorld.com) A massive iceberg which broke off from Antarctica’s Larsen Shelf today could spell disaster for Los Angeles if it floats too far north from the Antarctic continent.

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Tramp Junior Is Putin’s Daughter Says Russian Deep Throat

Moscow – (SatireWorld.com) According to laryngologists at Moscow’s famous Rear, Nose & Throat Hospital flaxen-heired Ms Junior has tested positive following analysis of intimate swabs. The news comes amid rising US-Russian tensions about KGB interference in 2016’s presidential troll. Uh, poll.

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Harvard Study Shows Mainstream Media Caters To Low IQ Liberals

Boston, MA – (satireworld.com) Researchers at the prestigious Harvard School of Media Affairs published a jaw-dropping study showing proof-positive results on what makes a person’s mind think in liberal political terms and the influence of ‘Fake News’ from sources like ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, MSNBC, Time Magazine, and of course, the Wall Street Journal .

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Blountstown Florida’s Gold Strike Adds Scores of New Millionaires

Blountstown, FL – (satireworld.com) The Blountstown Chamber of Commerce released a long anticipated report concerning the effects and repercussions the recent discovery of multiple gold deposits have had on the small rural Florida panhandle community. Massive nuggets and almost pure gold flakes have placed the once sleepy Florida town on the map of richest places […]

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Bader Ginsburg Banana Shot Scuppers Pool Sharks’ Hate Mail Scam

Washington DC – (SatireWorld.com) Supreme Court Associate Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg has ‘sure slipped a mean one’ right past the Trump Camp’s nose in a 9-Ball recluse refusal, the Associated Mess is reporting tonight.

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Study Shows Democrats in 2016 Election Hampered By Low IQ Voters

Denver, CO – (satireworld.com) The Institute for Freedom released its annual report on the state of American politics and it shared some profound revelations. Professor Sidney Campbell’s report highlighted the disparity in 2016 voting trends and some eye opening facts about ex-Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton’s stunning loss.

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Democrats Demand Trump Start Paying Rent For Living In Their Heads

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) President Trump has been living rent-free in the heads of tens of millions of Democrats for well over a year now, and many are finally saying “enough is enough.” They now want reparations.

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Rookie Auditions For SCOTUS Garage Band

Washington DC – (SatireWorld.com) US Supreme Court newby Neil Gorsuch is honing his ‘I-Shot-The-Sheriff’ tonight ahead of next week’s anticipated SCOTUS garage band audition.

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Trump Signs Four Executive Orders in His Sleep

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) President Trump is in the zone. He’s come out of the gate at full speed during his first week in office. Following a flurry of executive orders that were needed to begin repairing the damage that was the Obama presidency, Trump is a dynamo.

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Free College Education and Jobs is the Latest Liberal Mantra

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) After their routing in the 2016 Presidential, Congressional and State wide elections progressive Democrats needed to find other ways to spend taxpayers hard earned dollars.

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Noted Satire Writer Cheats Death

Mashpee Neck, MA – (satireworld.com) Captain America survives near death experience as Hyannis high speed ferry jumps Hyannis breakwater in attempt to shorten commuter experience

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Washington DC Metro to be Renamed Washington DC Obama

Washington DC- (SatireWorld.com) The Washington DC City Council has proposed renaming the Washington DC METRO the Washington DC OBAMA after the 44th president, who has derailed democracy in the USA for eight years. Currently the METRO suffers from mismanagement; plagued by breakdowns, failures, accidents and fires; loss of ridership; and fare increases. Long term maintenance […]

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Black Lives Matter Calls for Boycott of White Avatars

Fantasy Land – (SatireWorld.com) D’Aryll Scott-Jones, HMFIC of Black Lives Matter, called for immediate boycotts yesterday of all websites “that allow white supremacists to hide behind blank, lily-white avatars in their comments sections.” Mr. Scott-Jones made his remarks to National Public Radio’s Terri Gross.

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Kanye Bids For Seat On ExxonMobil Board

Irving, Texas – (SatireWorld.com) Buoyed by his tete-a-tete with President-elect Donald Trump rapper Kanye West has put forward his credentials to bigwigs at ExxonMobil, confident an imminent appointment is in the bag.

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Breaking News! Rolling Stones Agree To Play Trump Inauguration

New York City – (SatireWorld.com) The world’s most popular rock and roll band has agreed to play at President-elect Donald Trump’s inauguration on January 20th, 2017. This ends weeks of speculation as to who will buck the boycott placed on popular stars and celebrities who have been pressured by Democrat supporters to ignore Trump’s victory […]

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As Global Warming Heats Up Average Vagina Temperatures Drop Worldwide

Copenhagen – (SatireWorld.com) Esteemed scientist and 2008 Nobel Science Award recipient, Dr. Newton J. Blather, issued a startling warning to people everywhere concerning disturbing events he has recorded over the past year…Women and their vaginas around the world are cooling down due to global warming.

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Michelle Obama’s “‘Twas No Hope Before Christmas”

WASHINGTON – (SatireWorld.com) First Lady Michelle Obama is feeling hopeless these days. Unless her husband is the president, Michelle believes there is no hope for America. She was proud of this once great nation while it footed the bill for her world travels. But now that her home girl Hillary has been sent packing, suddenly, […]

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God “Sick and Tired of Being Everybody’s Damn Witness”

HEAVEN– (SatireWorld.com) The Lord God Almighty has had it up to his Charlton Heston-like brow with people who say “as god is my witness” when they want to underscore a statement or a threat.

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Fisher-Price Toy Controversy Brings Out Internet Paul Reveres

WHEREVER – (SatireWorld.com) Paul Revere is best known as a patriot in colonial days who alerted militia to approaching British forces before the battles of Lexington and Concord. An internet Paul Revere is someone who feels compelled to alert others on social media that something is wrong with a news story. They are similar to […]

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Meet The Alt-Right’s Golden Boy

NEW YORK— (SatireWorld.com) Richard B. Spencer, who has been called the Golden Boy of the Alt-Right, will adorn the cover of GQ’s February 2017 (Valentine Day) issue. The handsome, natty, and oh-so-controversial Mr. Spencer, who seeks to spread the gospel of white nationalism, is already spreading the gospel that “Neo-Nazis” are a far cry sartorially […]

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Crappy Crony Capitalism Exposed

Washington DC- (SatireWorld.com) While Crooked Hillary Clinton was Secretary of State (SOS) and also illegally involved in the Bill and Hillary Foundation money laundering scheme she was approached by Jonas Crappy. Mr. Crappy had an idea for a completely automatic, robotic commode, but needed funding. Hillary sent an urgent email, via her illegal home server, […]

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Declining Days of Obama’s Policies, Left on the National Mall

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) Liberal Democrats are in denial, pretending that Crooked lying Hillary lost because of the Electoral College, Russian hacking of voting machines and then retaining out of touch Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) as House Minority Leader. However, Americans are celebrating Republican victories at all levels of government (local, state, federal) by rejoicing […]

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SATIREWORLD’S PHOTO OF THE DAY………..

SatireWorld.com In our continuing efforts to offer our readers only the best and most relevant photos…Here’s the SatireWorld Photo of the Day!

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Fidel Castro Ashes Buried In Cigar Box In El Cheapo Cuban Funeral

Santiago de Cuba (Cuba) – (SatireWorld.com) Fidel Castro’s ashes were entombed in a massive stone next to national heroes on Sunday, as Cuba opens a new era without the communist leader who ruled for decades and killed or jailed dissenters in order to stay in power. In what’s being called the cheapest funeral for a […]

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Baltimore City to Ban Fracking

Baltimore MD – (SatireWorld.com) The newly elected Democratic Baltimore Mayor and the City Council are considering a resolution banning Fracking (Hydraulic Fracturing) for natural gas extraction within the city limits. The aim of the new law is to improve the climate, decrease global warming and to improve the health of the city’s residents.

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SatireWorld Presents…Stars Without Make-up-Photo Edition

Hollywood, CA – (SatireWorld.com) They flaunt themselves on big and small screens and draw legions of fans and admirers. But just how glamorous are these over-paid and ego filled stars in real life? Look at these unretouched photos of your favorite stars and see them in a new light….No wonder they’re unhappy and a bit […]

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President-Elect Donald Trump’s Updated Political Lexicon

New York NY – (SatireWorld.com) Republican President-Elect Donald Trump has commissioned a new dictionary for words from A to Z entitled Trumpapedia that removes the liberal/progressive nonsensical spin experienced during the Obama years. Here is a partial list:

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SatireWorld Editorial Corner
  • Blountstown Florida’s Gold Strike Adds Scores of New Millionaires
  • Blountstown, FL – (satireworld.com) The Blountstown Chamber of Commerce released a long anticipated report concerning the effects and repercussions the recent discovery of multiple gold deposits have had on the small rural Florida panhandle community. Massive nuggets and almost pure gold flakes have placed the once sleepy Florida town on the map of richest places […]


Turdblossom's Advice Column


POLITICS
  • Virtual Reality eSEX the Latest in Internet Technology
  • Silicon Valley CA – (satireworld.com) Playboy Magazine has announced that the monthly publication (with the titillating centerfolds and intellectual articles) is bringing back pictures of nude women after a short hiatus. Once again marketing managers have proven the old adage “Sex Sells” is still true.



BUSINESS
  • Virtual Reality eSEX the Latest in Internet Technology
  • Silicon Valley CA – (satireworld.com) Playboy Magazine has announced that the monthly publication (with the titillating centerfolds and intellectual articles) is bringing back pictures of nude women after a short hiatus. Once again marketing managers have proven the old adage “Sex Sells” is still true.



ENTERTAINMENT
  • Virtual Reality eSEX the Latest in Internet Technology
  • Silicon Valley CA – (satireworld.com) Playboy Magazine has announced that the monthly publication (with the titillating centerfolds and intellectual articles) is bringing back pictures of nude women after a short hiatus. Once again marketing managers have proven the old adage “Sex Sells” is still true.



MAGAZINE


SCIENCE & TECHNOLOGY
  • Virtual Reality eSEX the Latest in Internet Technology
  • Silicon Valley CA – (satireworld.com) Playboy Magazine has announced that the monthly publication (with the titillating centerfolds and intellectual articles) is bringing back pictures of nude women after a short hiatus. Once again marketing managers have proven the old adage “Sex Sells” is still true.



SPORTS


UK NEWS
  • Hillary Pleads Congenital Amnesia About Amanda Knox
  • Washington AC/DC – (SatireWorld.com) She’s putting back the con into congenital amnesia in what’s thought to be a little known side effect of post-partum psychosis affecting the world’s most incorrigible liars about the existence of secret offspring they wish didn’t exist.



US NEWS
  • Virtual Reality eSEX the Latest in Internet Technology
  • Silicon Valley CA – (satireworld.com) Playboy Magazine has announced that the monthly publication (with the titillating centerfolds and intellectual articles) is bringing back pictures of nude women after a short hiatus. Once again marketing managers have proven the old adage “Sex Sells” is still true.



WORLD NEWS
  • Tramp Junior Is Putin’s Daughter Says Russian Deep Throat
  • Moscow – (SatireWorld.com) According to laryngologists at Moscow’s famous Rear, Nose & Throat Hospital flaxen-heired Ms Junior has tested positive following analysis of intimate swabs. The news comes amid rising US-Russian tensions about KGB interference in 2016’s presidential troll. Uh, poll.



HEADLINES OF THE DAY
  • Blountstown Florida’s Gold Strike Adds Scores of New Millionaires
  • Blountstown, FL – (satireworld.com) The Blountstown Chamber of Commerce released a long anticipated report concerning the effects and repercussions the recent discovery of multiple gold deposits have had on the small rural Florida panhandle community. Massive nuggets and almost pure gold flakes have placed the once sleepy Florida town on the map of richest places […]



LEAD STORIES
  • Blountstown Florida’s Gold Strike Adds Scores of New Millionaires
  • Blountstown, FL – (satireworld.com) The Blountstown Chamber of Commerce released a long anticipated report concerning the effects and repercussions the recent discovery of multiple gold deposits have had on the small rural Florida panhandle community. Massive nuggets and almost pure gold flakes have placed the once sleepy Florida town on the map of richest places […]