Lawsuit Filed Against the EPA for Polluting Colorado’s Animas River

Denver CO – (satireworld.com) A lawsuit has been filed in a Denver Federal Court that names the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) and its contractors; EPA Administrator Gina McCarthy; and President Barack Obama in a criminal conspiracy to despoil the beauty of Colorado and surrounding western states.

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Fed: Hillary Caused Plunge in Global Markets to Get Email Story Off Front Page

WASHINGTON D.C. – (satireworld.com) Janet Yellen, Chair of the Federal Reserve, said in an emergency press conference today that Hillary Clinton was responsible for the 1,000 point drop in the stock market. While many financial experts had originally pointed the finger of blame at China for the worldwide collapse, newly discovered evidence points to the […]

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ISIS Vows To Stone-to-Death All 33 Million Ashley Madison Subscribers For Adultery

Mosul, Iraq – (satireworld.com) The depraved terrorists of Islamic State (ISIS) reportedly are planning to stone to death all married men and women death who have subscribed to the adultery site Ashley Madison. The announcement was broadcast today from the Iraqi city of Mosul during a regular ISIS news show. In the past the ISIS […]

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FAA Proposes to Ban Commercial Use of Drones for Five Years

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) A spokesperson for the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) announced that all commercial drones will be banned for five years until the FAA can come up with a set of regulations and develop software to prevent crashes with commercial airliners. In the interim period, drones will be treated as radio controlled model […]

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The Most Overlooked Voter In America is Pissed!

AMERICA – (satireworld.com) With the US presidential elections shaping up to be one of the hottest in decades, each candidate is carefully pandering to a smorgasbord of special-interest groups, ranging from gay, lesbian, and transgendered people to children of illegal immigrants, to working mothers, to evangelical Christians. But wait…aren’t they leaving someone who’s very important […]

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Obama Assigns Blame for the Cause of the ObamaCare Website Rollout Failures

Martha’s Vineyard MA – (satireworld.com) President Obama, as he was leaving aboard Air Force One for Washington DC after 10 days of vacation made a parting statement. He indicated that his administration had finally uncovered the culprit responsible for the disastrous roll-out of the ObamaCare federal health care exchanges three years ago

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White “Blacktivist” Shaun King Forces #BLM to Change Name

CHICAGO – (satireworld.com) Faced with another white person who thinks it’s cool to pretend to be black, protest group #BlackLivesMatter (#BLM) leaders say they are being forced to change the groups name. First it was Rachel Dolezal, and now it’s a boring white dude, Shaun King. Both putting #BLM in a tough spot because they […]

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Republicans File Paperwork With FEC to Put Biden on Democratic Ballots in 2016

WASHINGTON D.C. – (satireworld.com) Giving Vice-President Joe Biden the push he needs to make his decision official that he will seek the presidency on the Democratic ticket next year, Republican voters filed the necessary paperwork with the Federal Election Commission for him. Biden will surely throw a monkey wrench into Hillary Clinton’s previously planned coronation.

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Mashpee Radisson’ website in organized adultery probe

By Oleg Penkovsky Mashpee, Massachusetts – (satireworld.com) A Cape Cod hot spot popular with vacationing Washington DC area adultery suspects has been dragged into the furor about an online dating-cum-social netjerking membership service’s secret accounts. Angry residents blame a drunken Tea Party game of ‘Chinese Whispers’ for implicating the local Mashpee Radisson hotel as the […]

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Shaun King Defends Being Black By Claiming Mother Had Affair

BlackLivesMatterLand – (satireworld.com) Shaun King, a white guy caught up in the world of thug make believe, doubled down on his assertions that he’s black, well, mocha anyway after critics of the BlackLivesMatter movement suggested he was really white after his parents came out in public claiming they had two white sons. Claiming one was […]

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Baltimore Mayor Blames Wild Illegal Guns for Increasing Murders in the City

Baltimore MD – (satireworld.com) There were a total of 211 homicides in the city, as of August 15, 2015, exceeding the total for all of the year 2014. Most of the homicides are during Black on Black altercations. Democratic Mayor Stephanie Rawlings Blake says the murder situation is under control and is due to all […]

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Hillary Falling Apart on Campaign Trail Over Email Scandal

LAS VEGAS – (satireworld.com) After a town hall meeting here this week, reporters again tried to get Hillary Clinton to come clean over her continuously unraveling email scandal. As revelations keep mounting that the former first lady broke the law and tried to deceive the public about her dealings as Secretary of State, her excuses […]

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Cow Captured on White House South Lawn

Washington DC- (satireworld.com) The Uniformed Division of the Secret Service (UDSS) was notified by tourists at the White House that a cow was running lose on the South Lawn. UDSS Officers checked and verified the tourists’ observations and called the Secret Service office, the US Department of Agriculture (USDA), FBI and the Bureau of Alcohol, […]

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Are There A Few ‘Foot Longs’ In Jared’s Future?

Indianapolis, IN – (satireworld.com) Judge Marvin Hayes denied an anal plug request for recently charged child molester Jared Fogel submitted by his defense team upon sentencing. Fogel’s pending indictment of 2 counts of serial child molestation requires him to spend the minimum 10 plus years behind bars in a maxiumum security prison.

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DC Metro Female Butt Pincher Eludes Police

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) Female commuters riding the Washington DC Metro during morning and evening rush hours have been plagued by a “Butt Pincher” sneaking up behind these ladies and then disappearing into the crowded car or getting off the train. Metro Transportation Police have designated this person of interest as the “Shadow.”

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EPA Tells Municipalities They Can Pollute Rivers Any Color You’d Like

COLORADO – (satireworld.com) Doing a bang-up job of polluting the Animus River in Colorado last week has given the higher-ups at the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) a new idea for bringing revenue to the out of control agency. The agency’s incompetence has left the Animus a bright mustard-yellow color, full of chemical toxins like lead, […]

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Supreme Court to Hear Jones v Smith Same Sex Marriage Discrimination Case

Seattle WA – (satireworld,com) The Supreme Court during its upcoming fall 2015 term is to hear Jones v Smith, a same sex marriage discrimination case involving a wedding cake. The extraordinary circumstances of the case have warranted its hearing before the highest court in the USA. Lower court rulings have been split, some ruling for […]

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Hillary Campaign Corrects #BlackLivesMatter Members, Says “#BlackVotesMatter”

KEENE, NH – (satireworld.com) After getting blocked by Secret Service agents while trying to enter Hillary Clinton’s latest rally in this town, members of #BlackLivesMatter contacted the campaign and were granted a brief face-to-face meeting with the Queen of the Democratic Party. Afterwards, the group was wishing they hadn’t bothered.

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Omar! (He’s making eyes at me…)

By Oleg Penkovsky-de Blasio (satireworld.com) Washington, DC – An FBI trawl of Hillary Clinton’s emails has found hundreds of vagina selfies posted to Taliban arsehole Mullah Omar RIP. Forensic proctologists delved deep inside the annals of Clinton’s server before launching a probe on her SnatchChat account which the Bureau had long suspected of penetration by […]

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Target Becomes Most Politically Correct Retailer in the World

MINNEAPOLIS – (satireworld.com) Target may be the second biggest discount retailer behind Walmart, but there is no question they are the king when it comes to being painfully politically correct.

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Navajo Nation Declares War on the United States

Durango/Silverton CO – (satireworld.com) The Animas River in southwestern Colorado has been horribly polluted with toxic water spilled from an abandoned mine located in the region. The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) has accepted responsibility, saying agency personnel accidentally breached an underground store of mine waste and chemical-laced water.

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Megyn Kelly’s MILF Status in Question After Debate Performance

NEW YORK CITY – (satireworld.com) Controversy has erupted in male circles coast to coast after Fox News Channel’s Megyn Kelly threw a “war on women” statement and question at Republican front-runner Donald Trump early in Thursday night’s debate. Was Trump immature in his response? Sure he was. But Donald answered the charge by saying any […]

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Kenya Cancels US President Barack Obama’s Birthday Parade

Nairobi Kenya – (satireworld.com) The all day birthday parade and festivities scheduled for August 4, 2015 to celebrate US President Barack Obama’s 54th birthday were cancelled due to expected heavy torrential rains. The official spokesman for the parade organizers indicated that the earlier visit in July 2015 by Mr. Obama to his ancestral home had […]

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Planned Parenthood Videos Being Retitled to Get Media’s Attention

IRVINE, CA – (satireworld.com) Tired of the mainstream media ignoring the story about their videos of Planned Parenthood admitting they participate in the illegal practice of selling aborted baby body parts, The Center for Medical Progress is ‘rebranding’ their videos to make them more user-friendly for members of the media. Of course, these members of […]

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US Company Files Bankruptcy on 70th Atomic Bomb Anniversary

Wall Street, NY The Hiroshima Charcoal Briquette Company of Davenport, IA filed Chapter 11 papers early today in order to seek protection from creditors. Analysts cited a massive failure of the company’s two year old advertising plan in which five million dollars were spent on branding and not a single bag of the charcoal briquettes […]

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Comedian Amy Schumer Offers Advice For Gun-Free Zones

NEW YORK CITY – (satireworld.com) After a crazed gunman killed two people in a Louisiana movie theater during a screening of her movie Trainwreck, comedian Amy Schumer, cousin of Democratic brainiac Senator Chuck Schumer, became the latest celebrity to make a public plea for gun control. At a press conference, she offered her advice for […]

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New Liberal Organization LGBT Domestic Animals Formed

Washington AC/DC – (satireworld.com) Lesbian, Gay Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) organizations have been charged as being the “tail wagging the dog” when it comes to gay marriage, civil rights violations and transsexual rights, as only 4% of the population are involved. Specifically, religious persons have been targeted for not baking wedding cakes for same sex […]

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Obama to Receive an Award From a National Proctologist Organization

Washington DC- (satireworld.com) President Obama was to receive two awards, one from the National Association of Retired Proctologists (NARP) and the second from the National Association of Retired Gynecologists (NARG). The award presentations were to occur after Mr. Obama returned from his recent two day trip to Kenya and Ethiopia, but prior to his upcoming […]

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Hillary’s dark web trolling cached on private server

New York – (satireworld.com) By Oleg Penkovsky Bin Laden-Sotero For years a Fuxnet computer worm incubating in her private email server quietly harvested Clinton’s psychotic rants, mostly to Mullah Mohammed Omar, the now dead Afghani stand-up comedian-cum-former Taliban war lord.

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SatireWorld Editorial Corner
  • The Most Overlooked Voter In America is Pissed!
  • AMERICA – (satireworld.com) With the US presidential elections shaping up to be one of the hottest in decades, each candidate is carefully pandering to a smorgasbord of special-interest groups, ranging from gay, lesbian, and transgendered people to children of illegal immigrants, to working mothers, to evangelical Christians. But wait…aren’t they leaving someone who’s very important […]


Turdblossom's Advice Column
  • Shaun King Defends Being Black By Claiming Mother Had Affair
  • BlackLivesMatterLand – (satireworld.com) Shaun King, a white guy caught up in the world of thug make believe, doubled down on his assertions that he’s black, well, mocha anyway after critics of the BlackLivesMatter movement suggested he was really white after his parents came out in public claiming they had two white sons. Claiming one was […]



POLITICS
  • Lawsuit Filed Against the EPA for Polluting Colorado’s Animas River
  • Denver CO – (satireworld.com) A lawsuit has been filed in a Denver Federal Court that names the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) and its contractors; EPA Administrator Gina McCarthy; and President Barack Obama in a criminal conspiracy to despoil the beauty of Colorado and surrounding western states.



BUSINESS
  • FAA Proposes to Ban Commercial Use of Drones for Five Years
  • Washington DC – (satireworld.com) A spokesperson for the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) announced that all commercial drones will be banned for five years until the FAA can come up with a set of regulations and develop software to prevent crashes with commercial airliners. In the interim period, drones will be treated as radio controlled model […]



ENTERTAINMENT
  • Are There A Few ‘Foot Longs’ In Jared’s Future?
  • Indianapolis, IN – (satireworld.com) Judge Marvin Hayes denied an anal plug request for recently charged child molester Jared Fogel submitted by his defense team upon sentencing. Fogel’s pending indictment of 2 counts of serial child molestation requires him to spend the minimum 10 plus years behind bars in a maxiumum security prison.



MAGAZINE
  • Shaun King Defends Being Black By Claiming Mother Had Affair
  • BlackLivesMatterLand – (satireworld.com) Shaun King, a white guy caught up in the world of thug make believe, doubled down on his assertions that he’s black, well, mocha anyway after critics of the BlackLivesMatter movement suggested he was really white after his parents came out in public claiming they had two white sons. Claiming one was […]



SCIENCE & TECHNOLOGY
  • FAA Proposes to Ban Commercial Use of Drones for Five Years
  • Washington DC – (satireworld.com) A spokesperson for the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) announced that all commercial drones will be banned for five years until the FAA can come up with a set of regulations and develop software to prevent crashes with commercial airliners. In the interim period, drones will be treated as radio controlled model […]



SPORTS
  • Lance Armstrong Goes Trans-Gender
  • Leon Springs, CA – (satireworld.com) Well, you knew it was coming right? Just weeks after Bruce Jenner declared himself a ‘woman’ with man parts, washed-up cyclist and admitted doper Lance Armstrong is going to give womanhood a chance and enter the Tour deFrance bicycle event as a woman.



UK NEWS
  • Syrian Dating Site ‘Ashley Martyrdom’ Hacked, Subscribers Outed
  • MOSUL – The popular Middle Eastern dating site, Ashley Martyrdom, has been hacked and the identities of thousands of ISIS subscribers have been revealed. The outing of many militant fighters has caused much infighting within the ranks of the terror group and sparked a fierce debate over what kind of punishments should be handed out […]



US NEWS
  • Syrian Dating Site ‘Ashley Martyrdom’ Hacked, Subscribers Outed
  • MOSUL – The popular Middle Eastern dating site, Ashley Martyrdom, has been hacked and the identities of thousands of ISIS subscribers have been revealed. The outing of many militant fighters has caused much infighting within the ranks of the terror group and sparked a fierce debate over what kind of punishments should be handed out […]



WORLD NEWS
  • ISIS Vows To Stone-to-Death All 33 Million Ashley Madison Subscribers For Adultery
  • Mosul, Iraq – (satireworld.com) The depraved terrorists of Islamic State (ISIS) reportedly are planning to stone to death all married men and women death who have subscribed to the adultery site Ashley Madison. The announcement was broadcast today from the Iraqi city of Mosul during a regular ISIS news show. In the past the ISIS […]



HEADLINES OF THE DAY
  • The Most Overlooked Voter In America is Pissed!
  • AMERICA – (satireworld.com) With the US presidential elections shaping up to be one of the hottest in decades, each candidate is carefully pandering to a smorgasbord of special-interest groups, ranging from gay, lesbian, and transgendered people to children of illegal immigrants, to working mothers, to evangelical Christians. But wait…aren’t they leaving someone who’s very important […]



LEAD STORIES
  • I just lost another Facebook friend
  • I just lost another Facebook friend. (satireworld.com) She started a diatribe defending Obama and saying how much he loved this country and how much he was doing for this country. She said that people who opposed him were just selfish and looking out for themselves (which is the definition of selfish, but I didn’t point […]