Archive for March, 2011

Nigella Lawson Faults Cheap Bra For Recent Mishap

London, UK-(SatireWorld.com) BBC’s top cooking show hostess revealed on her blog how a cheap Chinese brassiere caused her to spend a few hours in the emergency room of the Royal Hospital last weekend with a rather embarassing injury.

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Snooki Left ‘Gobsmacked’ After Limey Reporter Suffers Sneezing Fit At Cast Party!

Satire News Pool Reporter Harold Worth was yet in the center of another controversy after the Limey Expatriate was assigned to cover the cast party for the TV Reality show “Jersey Shore” as they kicked off their new season of bad taste, big boobs and big hair in a gay way.

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Bumbling Limey Offers Bumbling Excuse For Being Missing

Paramus, NJ-(SatireWorld.com) Sometimes the unbelievable is just plain—Unbelieveable! In the case of limey reporter Harold Worth’s recent excuse for being absent from his girlfriend for the past weeks, it could just be a case of plain bullshit too!

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Fergie and Andrew Back in Saddle; Set to Share Wedding Vows with Will and Kate to Save Money!

London, UK-(SatireWorld.com) Finally realizing the inevitable, the Duke and Duchess of Yuk have announced they are getting back together and in order to save taxpayers’ money have chosen to renew their vows outside Westminster Abbey simultaneously with Prince William and Kate April 29th!

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Harold Worth Admits Coming to America Has Been a Big Arse Culture Shock!

New York City-(SatireWorld.com) The dazed and confused Limey reporter, Harold Worth, admitted today that perhaps he was a bit hasty in leaving his roots in Britain and traveling to the US in order to start a new life under an old identity and without learning how to speak the language. Speaking through a translator, who […]

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AT&T Promises ‘Free Cell Phones’ and ‘No Monthly Charges’ To Consumers After T-Mobile Merger

Washington, DC-(SatireWorld.com) Congressional hearings wrapped up today at the Capitol with the chairman of the FCC claiming a victory in certifying the proposed merger of telecom giants AT&T and T-Mobile.

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U.S. Considers Revoking Temporary Visa For Limey Harold Worth On ‘Human Rights’ Issues!

SatireWorld.com- Ever so bumbling limey reporter Harold Worth has now found himself in ‘hot water’ for taking the piss once too often as SatireWorld can now reveal, despite a British ‘super injunction’, that the sexist former reporter for Sky Sports was fired for cause and is now on the run in the states!

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France Shoots Down Unarmed Libyan Plane, Declares Victory, Goes Home!

Paris, France-(SatireWorld.com) French President Nicholas Sarkozy addressing an apathetic crowd estimated at around 350 on prayer rugs at the Eiffel Tower, shouted “We finally won one!” as he announced France was now pulling out of Libya and declaring ‘a glorious victory restoring French Honor!”

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Rumours of US Political Coup as ‘Magic Negro’ Continues to Lose his Mojo!

The White House-(SatireWorld.com) The first sign of trouble for President Obama was when he arrived ‘home’ today and couldn’t get in the White House as no one told staff he was cutting his ‘Spring Break’ short to get back in time for the Sweet 16 basketball finals.

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White Sharks Surf Tsunami Up Colorado River; Eat 14 Illegals off Yuma!

Yuma, AZ-(SatireWorld.com) The Tsunami that hit California brought with it several unintended consequences as Marine Border Patrol reports are coming in of Great White Sharks having surfed their way up the Colorado River snacking on several illegal immigrants attempting to float their way into Arizona on inner tubes!

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Obama Appears on Dancing With The Stars; Bombs! (sic)

Television Studios,CA-(SatireWorld.com) It was a moment the world was waiting for as President Obama prepared to take the stage in what some have described as his shining moment as he prepared to discuss recent actions involving on again off again actions involving middle east unrest and chaos.

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Rock Stars Find New Ways To Screw Over Loyal Fans

New Jersey-(SatireWorld.com) Imagine having millions of adoring fans who eagerly rush out and and buy your albums and pay heady prices for concert tickets, all in an effort to enrich your bank account to unimaginable balances. If you’re living in New Jersey, the cost of star worship comes high even for non-fans of rock stars […]

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Parents Distraught As ‘Jersey Shore’ Snooki Turns Up Missing

Seaside Heights, NJ-(SatireWorld.com) The parents of popular reality star Snooki appealed to the government of Libya today, in an effort to get Colonel Gaddafi to send their daughter home before she gets hurt or hurts someone. The diminative Snooki, the main cast member of the MTV reality show ‘Jersey Shore,’ reportedly took a hiatus from […]

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Hyannisport Cemetery Workers Place Concrete Weights On The Late Senator Ted Kennedy’s Grave

Hyannisport.MA-(SatireWorld.com) Workers at the Oldsmobile Memorial Cemetary in Hyannisport Massachusetts were busy today placing 30 ton concrete blocks upon the gravesite of one of the Democratic party’s most revered Senators…Senator Ted Kennedy!

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Reporter Harold Worth Lives Up To His Bumbling Personna

Cletus, GA-(SatireWorld.com) The Cletus Georgia chapter of the Klu Klux Klan (KKK) will remember this past wekend for sometime after SatireWorld’s roving reporter, Harold Worth, attended a KKK meeting and actually participated by wearing a hooded gown and holding a sign that read, ‘Give Peace A Chance’

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Travelers Find China’s Cuisine….Challenging!

Beijing, China-(SatireWorld.com) If you're planning a trip to China, maybe not knowing the language of China is a good thing when it comes to ordering a hearty native meal at a local restaurant.

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Limey Reporter Harold Worth Finds Happiness In Arms Of World Record Holder

Isle of Wight-(SatireWorld.com) Reporter Harold Worth’s newest assignment proved to be more than a match for a lonely man with a big heart. Sent to cover Ise of Wight Grand National & Ashey Scurry, Worth stumbled into the semi-finals of the Miss World of Iron Pumping competition in nearby Sandown at the quaint Castle Inn

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Britain Wants Another Shot At US With Revolutionary War ‘Do Over’

London, UK-(SatireWorld.com) Citing dissatisfaction over the outcome of the Revolutionary War in 1776, the British Crown has decided that a Revolutionary War 'do-over' would be in best interests of both countries and to finally decide some nagging differences.

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Japanese Officials Warn…’Godzilla Eggs Threatened By Radiation”

Tokyo, Japan-(SatireWorld.com) Japanese scientists at the Nippon Fish and Dwarf Incubator, have issued a warning that the nation’s proprietory source of Godzilla eggs are being threatened because of high radiation levels.

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Gay Couple Adopt Doll And They All Dress Alike

are making plans to send little Digby to Yale.

New York, NY-(SatireWorld.com) An openly gay couple have traveled the world with a doll called Digby, which is dressed in the same fashion and color scheme as its owners, or in this case, ‘parents.’

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Rocker Billy Idol’s Comeback Concert Marred By Wayward Toupee

Madison Square Garden,NYC-(SatireWorld.com) Rocker Billy Idol opened his comeback concert tonight with two rocking hits that made the aging 80's star such a big hit twenty some years ago. The songs 'Rebel Yell’ and ‘White Wedding' brought cheering and singing fans to their feet as the 35,000 plus fans sang the songs along with Idol […]

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Pope Francis Goes To Mount Olive – Popeye Almost Kills Him!

Vatican City -(SatireWorld.com) Pope Francis left the Vatican on Monday to travel to the US on a visit to shrines and diocese leaders. He hoped to stop at various religious landmarks he hadn't officially visited as Pope in previous US visits.

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Fukushima ‘Home Mini-Nuclear Reactor In A Box’ Recalled By FTC

Washington,DC-(SatireWorld.com) The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) issued a recall today for products manufactured by a Japanese company after numerous complaints surfaced from consumers. The Fukushima Home Mini-Nuclear Reactor In-A-Box with serial numbers beginning with 1887493760-A have been recalled and a credit will be issued by the manufacturer once the unit is returned.

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Hitler Was Color Blind Claim Once Secret Documents

Berlin, Germany-(SatireWorld.com) A recently discovered trove of unseen secret documents dating from the Nazi era, disclosed a secret many allied intelligence services overlooked.

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Recently Discovered Photos Prove Allegations That Adolf Hilter Did Nasty Things While In The Bathtub

Berlin, Germany-(SatireWorld.com) Workers excavating a world war two bunker discovered a treasure trove of historical photos and secet documents. Many are considered previously unseen and include personal photos of Adolf Hitler candidly taken by Ava Braun, his mistress.

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Prince William And New Wife Kate Middleton To Guest Star On MTV’s ‘Jersey Shore’ In July

Windsor Castle-(SatireWorld.com) Hoping to catch some beach time and warming July sun, Prince William and his then new bride Princess Kate are planning to spend a few days with the cast of MTV’s ‘Jersey Shore’ down at the New Jersey Italian Rivera also known to locals as…Seaside Heights. Billed as a royal slum fest, the […]

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Jerry Springer Show DNA Test Faults Tiger Wood’s Claim – “I’m not the father!”

Television City-(SatireWorld.com) The Jerry Springer show had its most popular guest back on once again. Tiger Woods has been accused of fathering yet another child, by yet another waitress. This instance is the 17th time Tiger has faced the heat on stage since his daliances were revealed to a shocked public more than a year […]

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MSNBC’s Sainthood Nomination For Obama Stalled At The Vatican

Vatican City-(SatireWorld.com) Monsignor Alda Frattelli has responded to cable new’s MSNBC claims that the proposed 'Sainthood' for American president, Barack Obama, has been tabled for now and his Holiness will review it in about ten or twenty years.

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Nigella Lawson Admits: “I Haven’t Seen My Feet In 14 Years.”

New York, NY -(SatireWorld.com) TV chef Nigella Lawson made a recent personal confession to the TV audience while on the popular Maury Povich show, claiming because of her breast size, she hasn't seen her feet in over 14 years.

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Obama And Business Partner’s Upscale HUD Housing Development Reportedly A Failure Costing Billions.

Bluetop Mountain, NC-(SatireWorld.com) Flush on the heels of real estate failures nationwide, the famed HUD financed upscale planned development of multi-million dollar estate homes over-looking famed 'Shit's Creek' has plunged into foreclosure.

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