Archive for October, 2011
US To Deploy Predator Drones To Watch Over Occupy Wall Street Demonstrators
The Pentagon – (SatireWorld.com) The Pentagon, working in conjunction with the CIA, has deployed Predator drones to watch over Occupy Wall Street demonstrations at key US cities. Equipped with ultra-high resolution cameras, the drone’s task will be to capture high resolution photos of the demonstrators and forward the images back to the NSA where they [...]
Full StoryHistorians Uncover Evidence Obama Never Learned From First Science Fair Project
Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) When he was a young boy in Indonesia, young Barack Obama/Barry Soetoro did a science fair project on the effects of pissing into the wind. Apparently, he has never learned the lessons of the experiments that he conducted for his project.
Full StoryTempers Flare As Police Mistake Obama Supporters For Zombies
Foreskin, IL – (SatireWorld.com) Local Foreskin police were tagged, as racist and quick-on-the-gun, after a hastily formed riot squad descended upon a gathering of Barack Obama supporters assembling in a local park.
Full StoryThe 2011 Dorking Dorks Award Winners Are….
It’s with great pleasure that SatireWorld announces….. it’s that time again…..The Dorking Dorks Awards are out! These Annual Honors are given to the persons who did the human gene pool the biggest service by disposing of themselves in the most extraordinarily stupid way.
Full StoryInvestigative Journalists Try To Discover Middle Name of Throckmorton P. Turdblossom
Storm Cellar, Arkansas – (SatireWorld.com) Just what, exactly, does the “P.” stand for in Throckmorton P. Turdblossom? The curmudgeon, who writes The Country Boy Advice Column (for the publication), and noted humorist is refusing to reveal his exact middle name. All that the author will say is that it is a family name, it would [...]
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”(Monday Edition)
(SatireWorld.com) Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, Exactly what does the “P” stand for in your name? Please tell us your middle name. Didy Dody Diddly, Delaware
Full StoryGay Chinese Claims The Dork Dance Made Him Stupid
Beijing, China – (SatireWorld.com) Wong Fu was a typical engineering student at the People’s University in Beijing. But when he went online and saw a new dance craze sweeping parts of England, he took a few moments and learned the intricate dance moves. It was a big mistake for Fu who later learned his IQ [...]
Full StoryEU Diversity Edict Kills Primogeniture in UK: First Born Son Can Now be Queen!
The centuries old tradition of Primogeniture in Britain which determined that succession to the Crown went to the first born male over other siblings has been overturned due to concerns of the EU over ‘gender equality, diversity and religious freedom.’
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom’s “The Country Boy Advice Column”(Sunday Edition)
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, My momma says that you are older than dirt. You are also the oldest person and the smartest person that I know. Were you there as one of the wise men at the manger in Bethlehem? Buddy Trucker
Full StorySuccess of Wendy’s “Where’s The Beef?” Prompts Other Chains To Revive Old Ad Campaigns
Madison Avenue, NYC – (SatireWorld.com) The success of Wendy’s recent revival of their old “Where’s The Beef?” ad campaign has prompted several other restaurant chains and other business to revive old advertising campaigns and marketing plans. People watching network television over the next few months might believe that they are actually watching a retrospective of [...]
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom’s “Country Boy Advice Column” (Saturday Edition)
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, I got this Meskin neighbor feller who don’t speak good English like most folks. A few years back, he was one of them morons with “Obama” stickers on his lowrider. Last week, I heard him calling our President “El Pendejo Negro.” What exactly does this mean? Clyde Buckle, Clearwater, Oklahoma
Full StoryBarack Obama to Star in Remake of “Downhill Racer”
The White House – (SatireWorld.com) President Barack Obama will star in a new Hollywood remake in an attempt to increase his rapidly sagging approval ratings. The film, originally made in 1969 and then starring Robert Redford, was titled “Downhill Racer.”
Full StoryRosie O’Donnell Says New Girlfriend Oprah Winfrey Is The “Gorilla My Dreams”
New York, NY – (SatireWorld.com) Rosie O’Donnell announced her new lover’s identity on Jay Leno with a confession that Oprah Winfrey is “the Gorilla my dreams.” When Leno asked her if he heard her right through her New York accent and wondered if she meant “Girl of,” Rosie bitch slapped Jay and told him that [...]
Full StoryAdolph Hitler’s Grand Daughter Gives Birth To Twin Boys In Bonn Hospital
Bonn, Germany – (SatireWorld.com) Adolf Hitler’s only granddaughter, Ava Gesundheit Braun-Hitler, announced the August birth of twin sons who were delivered in a secret underground bunker beneath Bonn General Hospital. Reportedly the twins were conceived at the Josef Mengele Fertility Clinic in Paz, Bolivia. Both mother and twins are reportedly doing fine. A huge torch [...]
Full StoryAerosmith’s Steven Tyler Loses Punch-up With Bathroom Toilet
Asuncion,Paraguay – (SatireWorld.com) Aerosmith’s lead singer Steven Tyler said that the recent ‘fall’ that knocked his teeth out and cut his eye was caused by shitty food poisoning not a drug induced high.
Full StoryFinally, Proof Osama bin Laden and Muammar Gaddafi Are Dead…Both Registered To Vote In Chicago
Chicago, IL – (SatireWorld.com) There is finally conclusive evidence that Osama bin Laden and Muammar Gaddafi are dead. Yesterday, they both registered to vote in Chicago.
Full StoryToo Late! Fergus McCarthy Throws His Hat in Ring for Ireland’s Presidency!
(SatireWorld.com) Friends of Irish Poet, Contractor, and Artist, Fergus McCarthy said they weren’t surprised that the crusty curmudgeon filed for the Irish Presidency just minutes too late.
Full StoryEllis Ian Fields Buys His New Gerbil An Engagement Ring
West Sussex (UK) – (SatireWorld.com) OK, they do things differently in England. Quaint homes with beautiful gardens. A temperate climate that is usually damp and cool. Riding bicycles and driving small gas efficient automobiles. Even have pets that do, well, very odd things!
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