Archive for May, 2012

Elizabeth ‘Pocohantos’ Warren Faces Scalped Man In Indian Whodunit

Boston, MA – (SatireWorld.com) Senatorial candidate Elizabeth Warren got a taste of Indian heritage today when a man in the crowd the ‘Indian Princess’ was addressing removed his hat and asked…’Are you responsible for this?” The man’s obvious scalped head bore the scars of a sharp knife and hurried removal.

Full Story

Obama’s ‘Booma-Booma’ Party: Armed Drones for Italy and…TURKEY? WTF!

Washington, DC – (SAtireWorld.com) Flying under the radar as it were, SW has learned that President Obama has been secretly negotiating with both Italy AND Turkey to supply them with armed drones in order to expand his ‘Joy Stick Assassins” charged with whittling down his ‘kill list’ of supposed ‘Enemies of the State’ conceived and […]

Full Story

Michelle Plans Move to Broadway in Remake of ‘Audacity of Dope’ as “Jesus Christ, Super Fly!”

The first lady, Michelle Obama, she of world wide vacations and extravagant private date nights, told the panel on the “View” she has no desire or inclination to continue life in politics after her husband is voted out of office this coming November.

Full Story

If Elected, Obama Vows To Place Elizabeth Warren’s Face On U.S. Five-Cent Piece

Boston, MA – (SatireWorld.com) Senatorial candidate Elizabeth Warren was paid a high honor when President Barry Obama vowed to place her facial imahge on a new US five-cent piece. “After all, Elizabeth is part Cherokee indian and deserves all due respect as a fellow minority,” said Obama as he adressed a gathering of retired Buffalo […]

Full Story

Leader of the ‘Choom Gang’ Hits The Campaign Trail

Normal, Il -(satireworld.com) President, and Choom Gang leader, Barack Obama, opened a three day swing through the heartland with a visit to the Fi Cannabis Society, a marijuana advocacy group, in downtown Normal, Il.

Full Story

Bill Clinton’s Blue Dress Fantasy Leads To Porn Girl Photo Op

Monte Carlo – (SatireWorld.com) On Thursday, a picture of Bill Clinton posing with three porn stars started circulating the Internet. It was apparently taken at a media event in Monte Carlo where the ex-President had his Secret Service agents ask the girls over for a photo-op. Even though one had on a blue dress similar […]

Full Story

Obama Now Links Demise of Easter Island to Bain Capital and Flesh Eating Conservative Bacteria!

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) Pulling out all the stops on his assault against capitalism in the run up to his re-immaculation, President Obama said Bain Capital was the major reason Easter Island inhabitants disappeared after they were ‘raped and plundered by blood sucking racist investors, most of whom were probably Mormons!”

Full Story

Global Warming Moonbat Says, “All Humans Need To Have Chips Implanted At Birth”

London (UK) – (SatireWorld.com) In a rare peek into the empty heads of those who support the comic book science world of catastrophic global warming, UK writer and global warming activist Elizabeth Moon argues that everyone should be involuntarily implanted with a microchip at birth so that “anonymity would be impossible”.

Full Story

Missing Port Dover Woman Surfaces In US Mental Ward

Port Dover, Canada Missing soccer writer Anne-Marie Strange (aka Lady Godiva) has reportedly been found alive in a US mental institution where she had been placed by for what friends are calling, odd behavior.

Full Story

Elton John and The Village People Upset Barney Frank Invites Adam Lambert to Perform at His Wedding Reception

Boston Butt, MA – (SatireWorld.com) Congressman Barney Frank (D-Ass) has caused controversy and jealousy in the entertainment world with his hiring of Adam Lambert to perform at his upcoming wedding reception. Other openly gay acts (Elton John and The Village People, for example) are upset that they were not asked first. The Construction Worker from […]

Full Story

Obama Insults Romney By Asking Mormon Tabernacle Choir To Sing At His Second Inauguration

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) Barack Obama fired the latest salvo in the political campaign for the 2012 Presidential election. He sent an official letter to the Mormon Tabernacle Choir requesting that they perform at his second inauguration and in the inaugural parade.

Full Story

Obama Completely ‘out of the closet’, Now Embraces English “Football!”

Camp David, MD – (SatireWorld.com) It now appears that since President Obama ‘tucked in’ Dave Cameron on Air Force I, an event which is said to have accelerated his ‘evolvement’ on the gay marriage question, he’s come ‘all the way out’ with his new infatuation with English ‘football.'(soccer to you colonists)

Full Story

Obama on Mt. Rushmore? Rumors Spark New Debate

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) A recent article about President Obama’s obsession with his legacy has prompted new calls to reserve his image on the famed Dakota landscape of Mount Rushmore.

Full Story

White House Laundry Workers Admit Michelle Obama Never Wipes Her Ass

The White House – (SatireWorld.com) White House employees in the laundry room admitted that the cost of replacing the First Family underwear supply is so high because First Lady Michelle Obama refuses to wipe her ass. Laundry supervisor Elaine Hotchkiss said that “she thinks the Secret Service Agents or some white folks should do it […]

Full Story

Too Big To Fail: Major Banks Prop Up Yuckerberger Farcebook IPO Scam!

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) The Federal Reserve is quietly working behind the scenes to ready itself to bail out three of the World’s largest banks after they went out on a limb to protect their get rich quick scheme centered around another Internet smoke and mirror ill advised IPO.

Full Story

Rare Reagan-Obama Photo Found! Shows ‘The Gipper’ Bottle Feeding Infant Barack Obama At Honolulu Rally

Simian Valley, CA – (SatireWorld.com) The Ronald Reagan Library released priviously unseen photos of a young Ronald Reagan holding an infant who’s no other than infant Barack Hussein Obama, the future president of the United States.

Full Story

Man With 30 Children From Eleven Girlfriends Asks Court To Lower Child Support

Knoxville, TN – (SatireWorld.com) A 33-year-old Knoxville, Tennessee man with 30 illigitimate children he fathered appeared in a Knoxville court this week to ask the state for help in lowering his portion of the monthly child support payments.

Full Story

Cher Mad Chaz/Chastity Left The Seat Up When He/She Came To Visit For Mother’s Day

Hollywood, CA – (SatireWorld.com) Singer, actress, and Hollywood personality Cher is upset that her daughter/son Chasity/Chaz Bono left the seat up whe he/she came to visit Mom on Mother’s Day. The entertainer admits to sitting down “farther than I anticipated” and getting her bottom more than a little soaked.

Full Story

Obamacare Offers Free Female Genital Mutilation To Preserve Chastity

Boston, MA – (SatireWorld.com) Civil libertarians have questioned the recent Obama Administration’s support of a provision in Obamacare where large medical convoys organized by the Democratic party wander through rural America performing free medical examinations and procedures on people, including female circumcision, or female genital mutilation, in violation of US law, conventions and treaties signed […]

Full Story

Scapolamine , Not George Bush, Blamed as Reason for World’s Financial/ Social Meltdown!

Bogota, Columbia – (SatireWorld.com) Reports out of Bogota, Columbia, now affirm that the social and financial morass rampant around the globe was not the fault of George Bush After all!

Full Story

Travolta on Tom Cruise: He’s a Nice Boy, But He Just Rubs Me the Wrong Way!

Hollywood,CA – (SatireWorld.com) Turmoil in the dark halls and secret closets of Scientology today after it was disclosed that two of the cult’s biggest stars , “Tiny Tom” Cruise, and “Big John” Travolta experienced a great deal of “friction” in their long running relationship with the mysterious group and each other.

Full Story

Elizabeth Warren Assails Scotland Yard over “Red List” replacing “Black List” for “Sensitivity Reasons!”

Boston, MA – (SatireWorld.com) Embattled Senate Candidate Elizabeth Warren, still digging her own grave concerning her alleged Native American roots, doubled down over Scotland Yards new ‘sensitivity policy’ requiring that the terms ‘Black List” and ‘White List’ be struck down in order to promote racial harmony.

Full Story

Canadian Conundrum Continues in Gender “Box” Identification Confusion!

Port Dover, Canada – (SatireWorld.com) The Canadian government admitted today that they are stumped over how to classify an influx of EU citizens flooding the country over fears of unrest, anarchy, crimes against nature, sodomy, football (soccer) riots, high taxes, not to mention political correctness and ‘uman rights!

Full Story

UK’s ‘The Spoof’ Suffers Through 3 Month Decline in Readership

(SatireWorld.com) After readership has gone up and down more times than Oprah’s dress size, the once popular British website, ‘the Spoof’ has nosedived in reader popularity in recent months…In fact, it readership has dipped an astounding 8% this month alone!

Full Story

After Reading Facebook Valued At $95 Billion, Internet Inventor Al Gore Sues For Unpaid Royalties

Oakridge, TN – (SatireWorld.com) Former United States Vice President and Internet inventor Al Gore filed a lawsuit today in Federal Court against Facebook. Gore claims that the social networking giant, which was recently valued at $95 billion, has never paid him the 2% royalty that he should be receiving.

Full Story

Stop Me if You’ve Heard This One: a Dwarf, A Commie and a Neo Nazi Run for President in France….What Could Go Wrong?

Paris, France – (SatireWorld.com) Following France’s Presidential election one thing is most certainly clear; the European Union is doomed, and what’s left of the bankrupt fragile coalition will most certainly go down in flames as riots erupt across the continent this summer.

Full Story

Elizabeth Warren: My Tight Cheeks Not from Lyposuction!

Boston, MA – (SatireWorld.com) Taking a page from General Custer, Mass-hole Senator Elizabeth Warren tried to circle her wagons after she was outed over her claims she was a minority Indian Maiden which afforded her special affirmative action perks during her rise to the 1%.

Full Story

5,000 Moslems in England To Move To Falkland Islands

London (UK) – (SatireWorld.com) Slightly over 5000 British Moslems, most of whom were born in the Middle East, have announced plans to relocate to the Falkland Islands. As the current population of the Falklands is less than 3200, this will give the area a new look and a new majority culture.

Full Story

Obama’s New Campaign Slogan…. Forward! (But looking back…who is this guy?)

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) After being shown on just about all media outlets, most have heard of the Obama campaign’s new slogan…’Forward.’ Most noteworthy is the dubious scrubbing of all references to the Marxist origins of the new slogan on its Wikipedia entry. This has raised eyebrows once again about Obama’s true socialist leanings.

Full Story

Chicago NATO Meet: Evac Plans Ready, No Fly Zone, Martial Law, Secret Service Vetts Hookers!

Obamaland, IL – (SatireWorld.com) Downtown Chicago, including Lake Shore Drive, is preparing to defend itself against ugly demonstrations planned by the Taliban and OWS activists during the May 1-21 Obama/NATO Fundraiser hosted by Hussein Obama at the $1m a plate dinner to be held in the Empire Room of the famous Drake Hotel.

Full Story