Archive for September, 2012

US Issues Warnings For American Women In Missionary Positions in Egypt

Cairo, Egypt – (SatireWorld.com) The U.S. Embassy in Cairo has issued a warning for American females in missionary positions in Egypt, saying they could be targets for terrorists. “The Embassy has credible information suggesting terrorist interest in targeting U.S. females in Egypt,” a message posted on the embassy’s website stated.

Full Story

‘Living Crap’ on Respirator After Being Beaten Out of Mugging Victim

Turdville, IL – (SatireWorld.com) On Thursday, Walter Jacobs was mugged after leaving a downtown movie theatre. According to police records, the muggers “beat the living crap” out of Jacobs. That living crap is now on life support at County Medical Center and is not expected to live through the night.

Full Story

Chicago Land: Mayor Emanuel in Forefront to Stamp Out Voter Fraud; Death Certificate Now Required to Register !

Chicago, IL – (SatireWorld.com) Jumping to the lead on a campaign spearheaded by Left Leaning Satirical Web site Glossy Arsed News (GAN), Mayor Rahm Emanuel said he’s putting his ballet pump down on (alleged) voter fraud after decades of (alleged) abuse in the Democratic Party stronghold. (sic, sic & sic)

Full Story

House Candidate and ‘One Percenter’ Alan Grayson Crashes His Mercedes Benz Into A Bus

Orlando, FL – (SatireWorld.com) Congressional candidate Alan Grayson (D-FL) crashed into a Lynx passenger bus in downtown Orlando around noon last Saturday. Grayson was rushing to an upscale fundraising event for his Congressional campaign in his ‘S’ series Mercedes-Benz when he ran through a red light.

Full Story

British Man Invents ‘Self-Banning’ Software….Subscribers Simply Disappear!

Lancaster(UK) – (SatireWorld.com) In the ever changing world of science and technology amazing marvels find their way into the desktop computers of millions of consumers. Often before much of the technology is proven or actually fully developed to its greatest potential. A Lancaster man possible upped the ante by developing a software system that actually […]

Full Story

1960’s Hippie Charles Manson Paroled After ACLU Appeal

Folsom Prison, CA -(SatireWorld.com) 1960s hippie and cult leader Charles Manson was placed on half-way house release after a civil liberties appeal brought his case before the California Supreme Court. Manson was released and hastily driven away by friends in a 1969 Volkswagen mini bus.

Full Story

Mainstream Media Already Spinning Obama’s Poor Debate Performance Before It Actually Happens!

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) The first presidential debate is only a week away, but the mainstream media is laying the groundwork to explain a bad Obama performance in the eagerly awaited contest.

Full Story

US Taxpayers Spent $1.4 Billion on Obama Family vs $54 Million For The British Royal Family

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) Move over Queen Elizabeth, the US taxpayers have set a record for personal for the First Family with annual spending now surpassing the $1.4 billion dollar mark for fiscal year ending October, 2012.

Full Story

Voter Fraud…The Tip of the Ice Berg For 2012

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) A national voter fraud watchdog group announced Tuesday that it has uncovered at least 198,731 cases of absentee ballot fraud in New York and Florida…a finding the group claims is “just the tip of the iceberg.”

Full Story

Elizabeth Warren to Represent Herself Against USDA for Piece of $1.3B Pie in Discrimination Suit as Indian Female Farmer with Hispanic Roots! (IFFHR)

Boston, MA – (SatireWorld.com) Proving once again that delusional liberal Democrats are awash in hubris, Senate Candidate Professor Lizzy ‘dizzy’ Warren (D,MA) will be representing herself as she goes after a big piece of the pie in the latest Obama vote buying scheme leading up to the election.

Full Story

Occupy Wall Street Gun Toting Protestor Sentenced to Jail Time

New York City, NY – (SatireWorld.com) A tattooed and pierced Occupy Wall Street protester will go to prison for two years after pleading guilty in Manhattan today to attempted weapons possession — for the .45-caliber handgun he told cops he got because “it went with my look.”

Full Story

Hillary Shows Her Political Agenda By Demanding A ‘World Citizen Tax’ To Help The UN

The United Nations – (SatireWorld.com) Playing her true American Democratic hand to the hilt, Secretary of State demanded that the United Nations levy a ‘international tax’ on all Earth’s citizens to help pay for the United Nation’s efforts to promote world peace and end poverty.

Full Story

Liberal Exodus Increases As Election Day Approaches

Ottawa, Canada – (SatireWorld.com) The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The recent actions of the Tea Party are prompting an exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they’ll soon be required to hunt, pray, and […]

Full Story

Perhaps the Quote of the Decade….

The Quote of the Decade: “The fact that we are here today to debate raising America’s debt limit is a sign of leadership failure. It is a sign that the US Government cannot pay its own bills. It is a sign that we now depend on ongoing financial assistance from foreign countries to finance our […]

Full Story

Are You A Gullible Media Lapdog Who Believes Everything You Read? Take Our Quiz!

The SatireWorld Political Quiz The rules are simple. We will give you a quote and you have to guess what great American said it. Your four choices are President Barack Obama, Ex-President George W. Bush, former Vice President Dan Quayle, or former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin.

Full Story

Man With Too Much Time On His Hands Lists All Of Obama’s Lies

A man who says he has ‘too much time on his hands’ compiled a list of Barack Hussein Obama’s blantant lies for all to see. Here’s a list of Obama’s documented lies so far with the most recent lies first. Lies During Fourth Year“ I think it’s important for us to understand that the Fast […]

Full Story

University Prediction Points to Big Romney Win….Obama Secretly Buying Hawaiian Oceanfront Home!

Denver,CO – (SatireWorld.com) via The Caller A presidential election prediction model developed by two University of Colorado professors points to a big win for GOP presidential contender Mitt Romney in November.

Full Story

Muslims Expand Protests to Southeast US: Piggly Wiggly Forced To Close 600 Stores in 17 States…Hillary Clinton Apologizes

Baconville, SC – (SatireWorld.com) Secretary of State Hillary Clinton was forced to apologize to US Muslims everywhere regarding employee owned Grocery Chain Piggly Wiggly which has 600 stores in 17 states and features a ‘happy pig’ in it’s advertising and promotional literature, a fact the Secretary called “distasteful, racist, ignorant, intolerant, and an insult to […]

Full Story

Pakistani Street Mob ‘Pranked’ by CIA Trick

Islamisbad, Pakistan – (SatireWorld.com) Sometimes the CIA wins and it’s usually done by a smooth trick played upon our adversaries without them knowing. In Islamisbad, Pakistan hundreds of protestors are feeling really stupid after a CIA infiltrator set then up in front of the world’s cameras.

Full Story

Study Shows Up to 75 Percent of Future Democrats Were Brain Damaged Shortly After Birth

Baltimore, MD – (SatireWorld.com) With just a few weeks before the general election, and Mitt Romney attempting to pivot the focus of the election back on the state of the economy, citizens with Democratic leanings are actually doing an unexplainable about-face on the criticism of the poor economy compared to their Republican counterparts.

Full Story

God Save the Queen As European Union Rogues Plot to Subjugate Britain!

London(UK) – (SatireWorld.com) In a breakaway move by 11 rogue members of the European Union to further isolate Britain, declare democracy ‘DEAD” and secure their bureaucratic hold on their unelected elite positions, the group, now known as the ‘Axis’, declared their resolve to elect a singular head of the new state, unify standing military forces […]

Full Story

DOJ Mulls Extradition of Christians on Egypt’s Kill List for “Peace in Our Time!”

Cairo, Egypt – (SatireWorld.com) Egypt’s new President for Life, Mohamed Morsi of the Muslim Murderhood called Hussein Obama on the carpet in a late night phone call demanding he turn over a host of Christian ministers and ‘hate mongers’ in exchange for calling off demonstrations through out the world.

Full Story

Unemployed Harold Worth-Less Finds Jobs A Scarce Commodity

Burlington(UK) – (SatireWorld.com) Harold Worth-Less is a familiar figure at the job search center in downtown Burlington where for the past 17 years he’s been diligently looking for steady employment. Plagued with personal troubles holding a steady job, the errant factory worker averages 4 months of employment before management realizes he’s a poor performing liability […]

Full Story

Gov. Patrick (D-MA) ‘Green Lights” Cherokee Groups bid headed by Liz Warren to Buy Red Sox and Build Casino Around Fenway Park

Boston, MA – (SatireWorld.com) Governor Deval Patrick, saying it would be ‘a feather in our cap’ backed a ‘minority’ proposal submitted by Professor Elizabeth Warren to purchase the ailing Boston Red Sox, tear down Fenway Park and replace it with a ‘state of the art’ Casino while still keeping ‘a small portion of the site […]

Full Story

The Difference Between The Sexes: Cars

Hollywood, CA – (SatireWorld.com) The differences between the sexes are not small and insignificant, as some of those people who walk the thin line (the he-shes) would make us believe.

Full Story

Mohamed Morsi to Hussein Obama: ‘Sticks and Stones will break YOUR bones, but your empty threats will never hurt ME!”

Cairo, Egypt – (SatireWorld.com) Egypt’s President, and staunch leader of the Muslim Murderhood, finally got back to Obama after refusing to take his call earlier in the day due to a ‘prior commitment to appear on the Rachael Maddow show.’

Full Story

US Man Sues Islam For Copyright Iinfringement Over “Death to America” Chant

Portobello, WA – (SatireWorld.com) Neville Pierce, age 61, filed a lawsuit in US Federal court today naming the Religion of Islam as a defendent in a copyright lawsuit. In the tort, the man claims he copyrighted the phrase ‘Death to America’ in 1979 shortly after the Iranian hostage talkover of the US embassy in Tehran […]

Full Story

Bad Golfer & Bad Foreign Policy: Obama continues to Tee Off Out of Bounds and Can’t Find His Balls!

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) With the Presidency adrift and the oval office occupied by an empty chair, American foreign policy, smoldering from malfeasance, amateurism, and political posturing finally burst into flames as radical Islamists desecrated our flag in Egypt and torched our consulate in Libya killing 4 Americans, including the ambassador in the process.

Full Story

Royal Photo Flap! Prince Charles Banned From Reviewing Royal Troops After Groping Affair

Buckingham Castle (UK) – (SatireWorld.com) Royal watchers were astounded after a royal edict came down that forbid Prince Charles from attending any parade or inspection functions at any military bases across Britain. This is in response to public furor aver a recent tabloid article published on Wednesday.

Full Story

Radicals Attack US Embassy Destroying US Flag on 9/11 Anniversary…State Department Issues Apology to Radicals

Cairo, Egypt – (SatireWorld.com) Fresh from desecrating a few dozen Christian Coptic churches, a rampaging crowd turned its attention on the American embassy in Cairo, venting anger over a rumor that a film depicting the Prophet Mohammed in a non-favorable way circulated through the Arab world.

Full Story