Archive for February, 2014

Political Newspeak, You Can’t Make This Stuff UP!

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) A few reasons why the groundhog Punxsutawney Phil went back into his burrow to hibernate for six more weeks of winter.

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Viagra blamed for Holder Blackout after blood rushes to his HEAD !

Washington,DC – (satireworld.com) Attorney General Eric Holder, 63, almost 69, was rushed to Walter Reid hospital today after he blacked out during a closed door meeting with President Obama to discuss copping a plea on several current White House scandals to take the heat off Barry!

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PHOTO OF THE DAY

Funny thing about Obama and Unicorns…A vast majority of Obama-bots believe in both!

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Ground troops outraged as SW reveals Hillary behind demand to retire “Warthogs” for being personal affront!

The Pentagon, Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) SW can now reveal in this exclusive, that Hillary Clinton was behind the decision by Secretary of Non-Defense Chuck Finagle (sic) to retire the Air Force’s venerable ground support fighter the A-10 Warthog in order to prevent her becoming the butt of campaign jokes leading up to her expected […]

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Karzai’s final sticking point to Afghan withdrawal: Pension, Benefits, Security and Obamacare!

Kabul, Afghanistan – (satireworld.com) The Obama White House said final withdrawal plans are almost complete for Barry to withdraw all troops in Afghanistan by Halloween 2014 after intensive negotiations between Hamid Karzai and US shadow ambassador Valerie Jarrett.

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PHOTO OF THE DAY

What the heck! I thought Barry never lied!

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Jeter, the New York Heartbreaker

Being a millionaire in New York is not something that dazzles many people, but when you’re single, win 22 million dollars per season and also the captain of the New York Yankees, things could change.

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Satire World Presents ‘ Today’s Taxpayer Kick-in-the-Balls’

The states with the highest welfare payouts – more than $20 per hour – are Hawaii, with payments equaling $29.13 per hour, DC at $24.43 per hour, Massachusetts at $24.30 , Connecticut at $21.33, New York at $21.01 per hour, New Jersey at $20.89 per hour, Rhode Island at $20.83 per hour and Vermont at […]

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Throckmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”

Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, I saw on the news last night that Walmart is going to start doing breast implants. I know that breast implants use saline pouches, and that saline is just another name for salt water.

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PHOTO OF THE DAY

Once again we are tricked by photo shopping!

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Even Wife’s Cell Phone Number Written On A Men’s Room Wall Doesn’t Deter ‘The Word’s Happiest Muslim!’

Tehran, Iran – (satireworld.com) Happy' Ali Mohammed is without a doubt the 'Happiest Man in the World!' He's earned this distinctive title by never frowning, never being angry, and always having an upbeat and positive attitude about all things in life.

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PHOTO OF THE DAY

Hmmmmmm a few more years and people will be squirting him with a seltzer bottle!

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GMC to Introduce New Automobile in the 2015 Model Year

Detroit MI – (satrireworld.com) President Barack Obama loaned Government Motors Corporation (GMC) $50 billion (bailout money) in 2009 to avoid the company’s bankruptcy. US taxpayers will lose upwards of $10 billion, but gain a new federally specified automobile (think ObamaCare) to contemplate buying this year.

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Islamic Cleric Backs Off ‘Visiting Mars Fatwa’ Now Says It’s OK To Visit Uranus

Saudi Arabia – (satireword.com) Promoting or being involved with a trip to the Red Planet is prohibited in Islam, a fatwa committee under the General Authority of Islamic Affairs and Endowment in the UAE ruled only last week. Now, that has changed with approvals for muslims to visit Uranus any time they want.

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Obama Directs FCC to Sit In on Satire World Editorial Conferences and Edit the News!

SatireWorld Corporate Headquarters In another example of the non relenting subversion of the Constitution and fair representation, the FCC announced unilaterally that they were imposing the “Multi Market Study of Critical Information Needs’ (MMSCIN) by- passing input from at least one of the two republicans on the commission.

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I have a Pen and a Phone!

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) Lame duck President Barack Obama has promised to bypass Congress and take more unconstitutional executive action like changing ObamaCare legislation multiple times without consulting the US Congress. He keeps reminding Americans “I’ve got a pen and a phone!” The far sighted founders of our republic instituted Constitutional Separation of Powers, to limit what […]

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Islamic Cleric Issues Fatwa Banning Muslims From Visiting Mars

Islamisbad, Pakistan – (satireworld.com) Promoting or being involved in a one-way trip to the Red Planet is prohibited in Islam, a fatwa committee under the General Authority of Islamic Affairs and Endowment in the UAE has ruled.

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Wendy Davis: I survived a non-government abortion; but I did lose oxygen to my brain for 30 minutes!

Dallas, TX – (satirerworld.com) Wendy Davis, on the campaign trail in Texas for the governor ship continued to embellish her bio today explaining, in her own words, why government sponsored and paid for abortion makes sense.

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Where Has All the Hot Air Gone?

San Francisco CA – (satireworld.com) Professor Dr. ME Schmuck of the Al Gore Institute (AGI) has been designated as AGI’s spokesman to explain why the concept of manmade Global Warming/Climate Change is still relevant. AGI located in Nashville TN was founded by former Democratic Vice President Gore in 2002, following his loss in the hotly […]

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PHOTO OF THE DAY

Ever try to read what these mutton heads write? Talk about murdering the English language!

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Obama considering 3rd term run after Gender Reassignment to thwart Constitution!

The White House – (satireworld.com) LBGT supporters are beside themselves after hearing rumours AG Eric Holder is studying the legal ramifications of a sitting president changing his gender in order to seek a 3rd term as a different persona.

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NATO Jet Shoots Down Prophet Mohammed In Ten Minute Dog Fight

Kabul, Afghanistan NATO forces confirmed today that a Royal Air Force F-16 shot down the Prophet Mohammed crossing over into Afghanistan air space after ignoring requests that he turn around and head back to Pakistan.

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The United States of Decline

The National Review – Deroy Murdock America is unraveling at a stunning speed and to a staggering degree. This decline is breathtaking, and the prognosis is dim.

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PHOTO OF THE DAY

Today’s photo shows how stupid most liberals are.

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Why California Is Broke and Texas Is Not

(satireworld.com) Ever wonder why a prosperous state like California is always so broke they cut back on just about every service, while Texas seems to just keep on doing the right thing. It’s all related to the Coyote Principle

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Bubba refutes claims Hillary too old to run: “old gal takes a lickin’ & keeps on tickin’ !”

The White House – (satireworld.com) With the images of being back in the White House as a ‘stay at home mom’, former President Bill Clinton , is positively salivating over the thought of a fresh crop of interns and ‘dinner and a porn movie’ with dysfunctional Hollywood Nymphos and Nymphets.

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PHOTO OF THE DAY

The Photo of the Day…Valentine’s Day!

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DeBlasio sends kids to school for two hot meals despite state of emergency and record food stamp give away!

NYC, NY – (satireworld.com) Taking heat after refusing to close NYC schools in the midst of a state wide severe weather warning and record snow fall, Mayor Bill ‘Che’ DeBlasio defended his action by saying, “the kids have to get 2 hot meals a day because their parents can’t be arsed!”

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The Hypocracy That Is Valentine’s Day; A SatireWorld Editorial

A SatireWorld Editorial. I hate Valentine’s Day. I really do. It isn’t because I don’t have a significant other right now (to shower with flowers and chocolates). It isn’t because I don’t have a significant other right now (to take a shower with me and lick off the flour and chocolate). Nope, the reasons go […]

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Give Me Your Bundlers and Your Progressive Fund Raisers

New York NY – (satireworld.com) The Statue of Liberty on Liberty Island (formerly Bedloe’s Island) is getting another makeover now that Democratic liberal Bill de Blasio is the Mayor of New York City. The statue’s new plaque celebrates both the new mayor and President Obama’s left wing philosophy.

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