Archive for November, 2015

Do Charcoal Lives Matter Too?

Fresno County, CA – (satireworld.com) A suspected burglar who became stuck in the chimney of a Central California home died of burns and smoke inhalation after the home’s elderly owner lit a fire in the fireplace, fire officials said Sunday.

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Papa John’s Benches Peyton Manning For J.J. Watts

New York City, NY – (satireworld.com) Due to mistakes in the restaurant lately, Papa John’s owner John Schnatter has decided to bench its starting NFL spokesman, Peyton Manning, for Houston Texans superstar, J.J. Watts. Manning recently became the pizza chain’s all-time leading spokesperson and is usually in command in all of his performances in Papa […]

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DNC Debt Crisis Unveiled

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) The Democratic National Committee (DNC) is having a major debt crisis, while the Republican National Committee (RNC) has accrued a significant sized war chest. The DNC has only $4.7 million cash in hand, with $6.9 million in debts owed, putting the DNC in the red, according to Federal Election Commission (FEC) […]

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Thanksgiving Circa 2025 – Now Called….’National Day of Substantial Regret’

Miami, FL – (satireworld.com) “Winston!!!! Come into the dining room, it’s time to eat,” Julia yelled to her husband. The 800 inch TV sound system made hearing his wife’s words difficult to Winston’s ears.

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Have a Happy Liberal Thanksgiving

The Heartland… For most people, Thanksgiving is a day for family, giving thanks, food, and football. For some, it means early shopping after the big meal. But for liberals, Thanksgiving is a time to gather families together and then alienate each other. It’s a sacred holiday because of the indoctrination and propaganda opportunities it affords […]

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Hillary, Obama Say Just Ignore ISIS and They’ll Go Away

IOWA – (satireworld.com) Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama have this whole terrorism thing figured out. So today, Mrs. Clinton echoed the president’s sentiment in a speech, saying Muslims have nothing to do with terrorism whatsoever. She also told the crowd that life is so much more fun and carefree when you live in denial.

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White Baker Convicted of Nazi Support in Chicago

Chicago, IL – (satireworld.com) A baker who calls himself ‘The Pillsbury Dough-Boy’ was convicted of charges he supported an exclusive club for area Nazis and often gave them dough for promoting rallies and secret retreats in neighboring Skokie.

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Official Obama Administration Updated Political Lexicon Released

Washington DC- (satireworld.com) The Federal Register of Friday November 20, 2015 carried a request for US citizen comments to a new rule being proposed by a little known federal agency within the Department of Education (DOE), the Committee of Political Common Sense (CPCS). The CPCS deals with eliminating political correctness on college campuses.

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Obama: “Chill, Refugee Vetting Database Run by Same Company That Did Obamacare Website”

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) President Obama, tired of hearing critics “pop off” about his plan to import tens of thousands of future Democratic voters from Syria, is trying to allay fears that the vetting process for incoming refugees is not adequate enough.  He said the process need not be made more complicated by Congress.

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Obama Vows to Protect All Americans

Washington DC- (satireworld.com) President Barack Obama has issued an Executive Order to the US Department of Homeland Security (DHS) and to the US Department of Defense (DOD) to protect Americans at home and abroad against threats to their individual safety. The Executive Order comes in the wake of: 1) the ISIS Islamic terror attacks that […]

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Obama Mulls Putting ‘Republicans on the Ground’ in ISIS Fight

TURKEY – (satireworld.com) Sticking to his strategy of no “boots on the ground” in the fight against ISIS, President Obama now says he is examining what he called “an interesting option” that could potentially take the place of his current strategy, which is military paralysis. The president has been looking for years for a military […]

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Eco-truthers’ Astroturfing Fuels Schneiderman’s ExxonMobil Suit

New York – (Satireworld.com) A ‘fantasy’ lawsuit brought by bug-eyed New York Attorney General Eric T Schneiderman says US supermajor ExxonMobil may have lied to investors about the risks a tarted-up theoretical weather bogeyman called ‘climate-change’ poses to the company’s future profits.

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Real Leadership Matters

Baltimore Maryland – (satireworld.com) A protest group of 50 sixth grade students, at the Martin Luther King Elementary School, have reached an agreement with the school principal’s office to remove a mural of President Barack Obama from the school.

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Honduras Intercepts Syrian ‘Orphans and Widows’ Using Fake Passports to Enter US

Tegucigalpa, Honduras – (satireworld.com) Police in Honduras have arrested five Syrian widows with their orphaned children who were travelling on stolen Greek passports and reportedly intended to enter the US by land. The five were detained after arriving on a flight from neighboring El Salvador on Tuesday night, police said.Honduran special police force spokesman Anibal […]

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SATIREWORLD’S……… Photo of the Day

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) I wonder how you vape using a cigarette holder?

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Obama Plans All-Out Skirmishes With ISIS

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) Not since General Patton has America witnessed such a brilliant military strategist as Barack Obama. Since the dawn of man, civilizations have fought and defeated their enemies through sheer force by any means necessary. No matter how violent, how brutal, a war wasn’t over until one side was beaten into submission.

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World Record For Biggest Baby Now Held by Liberal College Students

MISSOURI – (satireworld.com) Guinness World Records states that the record for the world’s biggest baby was born in 1879 and weighed just under twenty-four pounds. That long-standing record fell this week when, in light of current nationwide protests, spurred on by the protests on the University of Missouri campus, Guinness certified America’s liberal college students, […]

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Breaking News! Charlie Sheen Admits….”My Penis Has Fallen and it Can’t Get Up!”

Hollywood,CA – (satireworld.com) Some are saying Hollywood will never be the same.Especially after Actor Charlie Sheen publicaly admits he’s HIV Positive and ending a week of rampant speculation. Various press reports hinted that the randy actor contracted the dreaded disease years ago and neglected to inform up to 200 consensual sexual partners who are threatened […]

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University of Missouri Changing Curriculum, Name of School

COLUMBIA, MO – (satireworld.com) With the firing of top administrators at the University of Missouri because of racial protests, the school is taking the opportunity to make some changes to help students feel more comfortable and safe. The first thing to change is the school’s name. The University of Missouri is now known as the […]

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SatireWorld’s….Photo of the Day

Feeling a little stifled by tough questions and choices? That nasty Freedom of Speech got you down? Well, jump into your ‘Safe Space’and pull the covers over your head you namby-pamby crybaby…..

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DRDL Society Formed

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) A new men’s only protest organization, the Dress to the Right or Dress to the Left (DRDL) Society, has been formed in the Nation’s Capital with local chapters in all major US cities. The DRDL is lobbying Congress for two separate men’s rest room facilities in all work places, hotels, fitness […]

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Bush Opening Handyman Service With #JebCanFixIt

FLORIDA – (satireworld.com) With his campaign having as much traction as a three-legged cat trying to bury a turd on a frozen pond, Jeb! Bush is seeing the writing on the wall and starting to plan for life after presidential politics. With his new slogan, #JebCanFixIt, the former Florida governor hoped to kick start his […]

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Democrats Accuse Trump of Reading Lines Off Cue Cards on SNL

NEW YORK CITY – (satireworld.com) Democratic National Committee chairbeast, Debbie Wasserman Schultz, accused Donald Trump of reading some of his lines off of cue cards during his hosting gig on Saturday Night Live last night. Schultz says she is appalled that Trump would stoop to such a stunt.

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Transgender Boycott of 2017 Houston Super Bowl Could Cost City Hundreds of Dollars

HOUSTON – (satireworld.com) Following a rebuke by voters of their attempt to turn Houston into a modern Sodom and Gomorrah by forcing sexual boundaries to be blurred to appease an extreme minority, the LGBT community is bringing out the pitchforks in an attempt to punish those voters for saying “no thanks” to their offer to […]

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‘Deport Racism’s’ Children’s Choir Planning Release of Christmas Album

New York, NY – (satireworld.com) Those incorrigible kids from the Deport Racism, anti-Trump, profanity-laced video that is creating a national backlash are now going to be releasing their very own holiday album this month, titled “Get the F@ck Out of My Country, Santa!” The album will be recorded by the man who produced the warm […]

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If Elected, Hillary Will Make Pantsuits Mandatory For All Women

BROOKLYN – (satireworld.com) In a glimpse of what may come if Hillary Clinton is elected to the White House in 2016, the Democrat presidential hopeful said that, if she wins, her first order of business will be to sign an executive order making it mandatory for all American women, regardless of age, to wear colorful […]

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Meet the Stupidest Member of Congress…..And that Says Alot!

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) Looking like she posed for a 1950’s vintage box cover for some curl relaxing product. Sheila Jackson-Lee brings on and piles it high with heaps of plain old stupidity leaving many people to ponder….Who voted in this jackass anyway?

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Hillary Diagnosed With Pinocchio Syndrome

Washington DC- (satireworld.com) Democratic Presidential Candidate Hillary Clinton was rushed to Walter Reed Medical Center complaining of severe body pains. The sudden debilitating aches occurred while she was speaking to a group of political supporters at a fund raiser in nearby Prince Georges County Maryland. Former President Bill Clinton arrived at his wife’s bedside after […]

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Formicophilia A Favorite Past-time Thrill With Current European Refugees

Berlin, Germany-(satireworld.com) Mohammed says he doesn’t miss Syria any longer, especially the daily threats of violence and a life filled with occasional chaos. Today, Mohammed gets up every morning and drives his new S-series Mercedes Benz to his custodial job at the Entomology Center at Nordic Peoples Pharmaceutical Company in suburban Berlin, where he cleans […]

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TODAY’S PHOTO-SAYS-A-THOUSAND-WORDS-MOMENT

Hollywood………..Fashion photography has hit a new low with Caitlyn Jenner trying to be sexy.

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