Archive by Author

Ex-Jersey Shore Cast Member Recalls Seaside Heights EPA Crackdown

Seaside Heights, New Jersey – (satireworld.com) Alfonse Pepitone recalled the terrible summer weekend in 2009 when New Jersey EPA officials segregated the cast members of Jersey Shore, a reality TV show. Pepitone played ‘Gonzo the Gorgeous Ginzo’, a local pizzeria owner who delivered custom ‘tomato pies’for the show regulars. Pepitone recalls, that while in EPA […]

Full Story

Man With One Leg Claims… “I’ve Never Been Busier Kicking Asses”

Durham, NC – (satireworld.com) Morris Helms says he’s never been busier! The retired veteran, who looks a healthy 50 instead of almost 65, says ever since he read an ad looking for contestants in a local contest he’s been very busy on Saturday nights. “It’s like taking candy from a baby!”

Full Story

Boy Who Received Real Victoria Secret Model For Christmas Upset Over Where To Place The Batteries

Buffalo, NY-(SatireWorld.com) Kevin Bey seems the normal 15 year old. He likes football, computer games, watching TV, and writing silly little stories that give his sister laughs. Most would say he was just a normal kid with a big imagination. He certainly had enough friends to keep him company and play sports with. But that […]

Full Story

France Denies ISIS Terror Group Export Technology License

Paris, France – (satireworld.com) You have to hand it to the French government for being on their toes and halting sensitive technological exports to country’s who support terror. This past week French Security Forces headed by General Gordon Lepage thwarted an attempt to spirit away several crates of important French technology on a Venezualan registered […]

Full Story

First Jihadist Fashion Show Wows Londoners

London, England-(SatireWorld.com) Yes! Khaki is back! The popular Mohammed’s Jihadist Fashion House has released a full line of Jihadist’s men’s fashion and accessories which were shown at the annual Osama Bin Laden Jihadist Fashion Show in downtown London this past weekend. Coverage of the event was promoted by the British Labour Party as part of […]

Full Story

Government Spy Blimps To Fly Over Maryland

Aberdeen, MD – (satireworld.com) Soon, Maryland will be the home to a couple of new landmarks. Actually, sky-marks. Two large blimps will soon rise over Harford County and stay put using tether wires. Radar blimps like these have been used on the battlefield to track the enemy, and in the Caribbean to intercept drug runners. […]

Full Story

Jessica Simpson To Join FOX News

New York City, NY – (satireworld.com) Fox News announced its summer news lineup and a surprising new co-anchor is being added to the O’Reilly Factor normally broadcast during viewing prime time. The addition of a new and fresh face to the highly viewed Bill O’Reilly show was a surprise to most loyal viewers, but the […]

Full Story

Why California Is Broke and Texas Is Not

(satireworld.com) Ever wonder why a prosperous state like California is always so broke they cut back on just about every service, while Texas seems to just keep on doing the right thing. It’s all related to the Coyote Principle

Full Story

Sarah Palin: “Leader No… Sham Wow Guy-Yes!”

Wassila, Alaska – (SatireWorld.com) Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin (R) took to Facebook early Thursday to attack President Barack Obama’s Wednesday speech on health care, accusing the president of delivering “another ‘ShamWow’-style infomercial for Obamacare.”

Full Story

Obama State of Union Speech Flops…Lowest Audience Since 1977

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) President Obama’s Tuesday State of the Union address had the fewest viewers of any State of the Union speech since 1977 and did nothing to boost his flagging approval ratings.

Full Story

Secret Service Reports….White House Ghost Scares The President!

The White House – (SatireWorld.com) Just in time for Halloween. The zany folks over at the White House have reported that the current resident, one Barack Hussein Obama, reported seeing a smiling ghostly apparition in a hallway mirror in the east wing.

Full Story

Texas Mom Files ‘Bullying Report’ After Son’s Football Team Defeated by 91-0

Fort Worth, TX – (SatireWorld.com) Each week there are football blowouts across the nation. Rarely are they more one-sided than the 91-0 rout Aledo High (Aledo, Tex.) put on Western Hills High (Fort Worth, Tex.). Now, one parent has apparently been so concerned by the final scoreline that they took the extraordinary step of filing […]

Full Story

Weiner Says He’ll Stick It Out For The Democratic Party

New York City – (SatireWorld.com) Anthony Weiner vowed Sunday to stay in the New York City mayor’s race, as he confirmed his campaign manager quit and his top rival said he was not qualified to lead the nation’s most populous city.

Full Story

Local Man Burned Using Shop Vac to Clean Up Gasoline Spill

Chipperton, GA – (SatireWorld.com) A man suffered serious burn injuries Sunday evening while using a shop vacuum to suck up spilled gasoline from around a vehicle in a closed garage.

Full Story

Mistrial Declared When Man’s Prosthetic Eye Pops Out On Witness Stand

Philadelphia, PA – (SatireWorld.com) An assault trial over a fight that cost a man his left eye ended in a mistrial Wednesday when his prosthetic eye popped out as he was testifying, startling jurors to the point that some had to be excused.

Full Story

During Senate Hearing on Benghazi Attack…Secretary Hillary Clinton Stuns Senators By Testifying in Swim Suit

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) White House Press Secretary Jay Carney on Wednesday defended Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton’s appearance before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, claiming that it doesn’t make a difference what she wears to a senate hearing.

Full Story

Obama Photo Shocks Supporters As He Eats A Chick-Fil-A Sandwich During Campaign Stop

Winter Park, FL – (SatireWorld.com) There will be one less camapign aide to do the bidding of staffers as a to-go sandwich mix-up caused President Obama a photo embarassment on the campaign trail on Thursday during a stop in Florida.

Full Story

What The Hell Is This Kwanzaa Thing Anyway?

Chicago, IL – (SatireWorld.com) President Obama went on the airwaves today praising the celebration of Kwanzaa and wishing celebants a ‘happy and healthy’ Kwanzaa. I’m not sure, but the last time I looked my Kwanzaa was looking pretty healthy. So, what the hell is Kwanzaa anyway?

Full Story

Actor Charlie Sheen Flashes Photos Of Lady Godiva In Nothing But Her Underwear!

Port Dover, Ontario – (SatireWorld.com) A drunk and disoriented, Charlie Sheen amused local patrons at a seedy Port Dover bar by wearing a lampshade and dancing clumbsily around the pool table while showing photos of himself and scantily clad photos of local writer Lady Godiva while she was doing a Jamaican limbo dance to anyone […]

Full Story

The Labor Department Approves Trade Adjustment Assistance For Former Employees Of Bankrupt Solar Panel Maker Solyndra.

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) The Labor Department today announced that it had approved Trade Adjustment Assistance for the former employees of the bankrupt solar panel maker Solyndra.

Full Story

Scientists Say Asteroid Will Hit Earth. Iran Most Likely ‘Ground Zero’

Houston, Texas – (SatireWorld.com) Scientists at NASA forewarned civilization weeks before an asteriod the size of California would strike ‘somewhere on the planet during December. They were tracking the out of world body with a state-of-the-art telescope from atop the Empire State building in New York City.

Full Story

McDonalds Tampon Thrower Pleads Guilty

Noosaville, Australia – (SatireWorld.com) An aspiring model who threw a wet tampon at a McDonald’s worker “for a laugh” says the drunken prank has ruined her life. Rebecca Leigh Crimmins, who pleaded guilty to common assault in the Noosa Magistrates Court, said she had “pretty much lost everything” since the tampon-tossing incident in the early […]

Full Story

Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler Loses Punch-up With Bathroom Toilet

Asuncion,Paraguay – (SatireWorld.com) Aerosmith’s lead singer Steven Tyler said that the recent ‘fall’ that knocked his teeth out and cut his eye was caused by shitty food poisoning not a drug induced high.

Full Story

Obama Heads Out On Bus Tour-Plans Stop In SC To Pan For Gold

Hickory, NC – (SatireWorld.com) President Obama will kick off a three-day bus trip through small towns in politically competitive North Carolina and South Carolina, but White House officials insist the trip is about jobs, not panning for gold as some reports suggest.

Full Story

Michelle Obama Plans Jumping Jacks Guiness Record – FEMA Puts DC On Earthquake Alert!

The White House – (SatireWorld.com) Michelle Obama wants to jump into the Guinness World Records book next week by helping break the title for the most people doing jumping jacks in a 24-hour period.

Full Story

English Town Holds Anti-Spoof Protest

Dorky,England – (SatireWorld.com) The SW English town of Dorky held a rare celebration last night, an event that pulled in hundreds of angry towns people who gave up a night of television in order to vent their anger at a group of eleven outsiders who internationaly ridiculed their town and its residents on a sub-par […]

Full Story

Man Invents Self-Banning Computer Software! (viewer discretion advised)

Lancaster, England – (SatireWorld.com) In the ever changing world of science and technology amazing marvels find their way into the desktop computers of millions of consumers. Often before much of the technology is proven or actually fully developed to its greatest potential. A Lancaster man possible upped the ante by developing a software system that […]

Full Story

Local Woman Edna Spotz Sees Red After Being Told She’s Not ‘Green’ Enough

Greenville, SC – (SatireWorld.com) In the line at the local grocery store, the bagging clerk told local woman Edna Spotz that she should bring her own grocery bags from now on, because plastic bags weren’t good for the environment. The woman apologized to him and explained, “We didn’t have the ‘greenie thing’ back in my […]

Full Story

TSA Employee Fired After Releasing Airport X-ray Image Of Boss Janet Napolitano

Chicago, Illinois (SatireWorld.com) Saturday was a bad day for TSA employee Melvin Wasserman-Schultz after he inadvertently released over the internet a photo of his boss Janet Napolitano undergoing a routine body scan at Chicago’s O’Hare Airport.

Full Story

Congress Questions White House Over Titanium Toilets For Air Force One

Aboard Air Force One – (SatireWorld.com) Congressional watchdogs have questioned the White House over a GSA report that lists a $2.4 million dollar expediture for titanium reinforced toilets. According to the report, service consultants from the GSA are now replacing the toilets aboard Air Force One with a larger, stronger seat for, and at the […]

Full Story