Archive by Author

Man Taking ‘Selfies with Gun’ Shoots Self

Baltimore, MD – (satireworld.com) A 19-year-old Baltimore man is dead after police say he accidentally shot himself while taking ‘selfies’ while holding a loaded magnum revolver.

Full Story

Meat Found In McDonald’s Hamburger!

Peoria, IL -0 (satireworld.com) An Illinois couple says they got a huge surprise after a burger run to their local McDonald’s. Debbie and Hans Mirth ordered a double cheeseburger at the Golden Arches drive-thru. After returning home and unwrapping the meal, they discovered it contained real meat, Mirth told a reporter from local NBC affiliate […]

Full Story

Kerry: ‘Iran Limited To 30,000 Pound Nuke Warheads’

Geneva, Switzerland – (satireworld.com) In a sweeping announcement at the end of months of negotiation, Secretary of State John Kerry outlined the signed weapons treaty that limits Iran’s future nuclear capability.

Full Story

MSNBC’s Chris Matthews Blames ‘Lack of Straight Lines’ For Amtrak Crash

New York City, NY – (satireworld.com) In two separate segments on his May 13 Softballs With Chris Matthews program, MSNBC anchor Chris Matthews blamed “curves” on the Amtrak passenger rail route for Tuesday night’s train crash.

Full Story

Police Crack Easter Bunny Murder

Spokane, WA – (satireworld.com) Sarah Eostre was a normal teenage girl of 17 from outward appearances. Her room at home had scores of frilly dolls, the usual posters on the wall, piles of school books, and an open and marked copy of ‘Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse’ a novel by Robert Rankin. Also in […]

Full Story

NBC News Sources: ‘Odd Items Found While Cleaning Out Brian William’s Locker’

New York City, NY (satireworld.com) The latest installment of the odd ‘Lyin’Brian’ Williams story is unfolding as news department employees get to vent their anger over ‘one of their own’ who went a little too far with his self-enhancing lies. According to a senior staffer, employees cleaning out the veteran anchor’s dressing room locker found […]

Full Story

Super Bowl Drug Test Controversy Over Viagra Use On Deflated Footballs

Phoenix, AZ – (satireworld.com) Moments after the New England Patriots clinched the Super Bowl with a stunning end-zone interception, Super Bowl officials re-heated the controversy over under-inflated footballs by announcing an NFL football drug testing results on the game ending football conducted by game referees.

Full Story

After Profits Drop 10% – McDonalds Dumps Ronald McDonald Image

Chicago, IL – (SatireWorld.com) Ronald McDonald is falling on hard times after a 47 year run as the official spokesman and mascot for the fast food hamburger giant McDonalds. Citing unresponsive interest in youngsters now preoccupied with apps, gaming, and computers, todays children find the yellow-jumpered mascot, well, just plain boring.

Full Story

Russia Enraged Over Soviet-era Monument Decorations

Moscow, Russia – (satireworld.com) Russian officials and Vladimir Putin are enraged over Bulgarians ‘vandalizing’ Soviet-era monuments to look like superheroes and other Western characters.

Full Story

It’s ‘Madder Than Hell Week’ in Washington, DC

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) The fallout from the recent and ongoing Veterans Admimistration scandal has surfaced at the White House, after White House chief of staff says President Barack Obama is “madder than hell” about reports of treatment delays at veterans’ hospitals across the country.

Full Story

World’s Filthiest Restaurant Finally Closes

El Paso, TX – (satireworld.com) Planning on dining out tonight? You might want to pass on Chinese food at a popular El Paso eatery.

Full Story

How To Speak Mexican…Today’s Word is ‘Mushroom’

How To Speak Mexican…..Mexican speak 101!

Full Story

Democratic Women Turn To Having Dogs Rather Than Children

New York City – (satireworld.com) America’s next generation of youngsters could be four-legged and might howl at the moon if millions of Gen-X female democrats have their way and avoid childbirth.

Full Story

Progressive Insurance….’Well, Actually Flo Spins A Pretty Good B-S Story’

Somewhere Out In TV Land – (satireworld.com) Progressive Insurance….Who are they? You’ve seen and probably smiled at the clever Progressive Insurance TV commercials with bubble-headed Flo smiling away at the camera. Well, as Paul Harvey would say, “You’re about to learn the rest of the story”.

Full Story

Union Bosses Pay MSNBCs Ed Schultz Mega-Bucks To Say Nice Things About Unions!

. New York City, NY – (SatireWorld.com) Liberal MSNBC, radio host, and part-time caveman, Ed Schultz was paid approximately $177,000 by labor unions in 2012, Truth Revolt reported, citing data available on the Department of Labor’s website.

Full Story

Obama Finally ‘Messes with the Marines’ Forcing Them To Wear Unisex Hats

Paris Island, SC – (SatireWorld.com) Straight from the ‘this isn’t going to go over well section of the Poor Planning Manual’, the White House announced a change to the Marine Corps’ uniform hats could take the hard-nosed Leathernecks from the Halls of Montezuma to the shops of Fith Avenue.

Full Story

MSNBC’s ‘Up Late With Alec Baldwin Show’ Fails Miserably

New York City, NY – (SatireWorld.com) Alec Baldwin’s premiere of his new MSNBC interview show, ‘Up Late With Alec Baldwin’ logged an average of 654,000 viewers on Friday–up 53% compared to the timeslot’s take one week earlier.

Full Story

Penn State’s Jerry Sandusky’s Sentencing Appeal Denied

Harrisburg, PA – (SatireWorld.Com) Former Penn State assistant football coach Jerry Sandusky should not get a new trial after being convicted of sexually abusing 10 boys, a Pennsylvania appeals court ruled Wednesday. The unanimous decision by a three-judge Superior Court panel came barely two weeks after they heard oral arguments by Sandusky’s lawyer and a […]

Full Story

Russian Official Says-“Obama’s Syrian Policy Is Like A Monkey Holding A Hand Grenade!”

Moscow, Russia – (SatireWorld.com) A firebrand Russian nationalist-turned-senior official said Tuesday that the West, and Obama in particular, was acting in the Islamic world like a “monkey with a hand grenade.” Deputy Prime Minister Dmitry Rogozin, Russia’s former envoy to NATO, did not elaborate on his comparison, made on his Russian-language Twitter page. But Rogozin, […]

Full Story

George Mason University Students Demand Abortion Option Even After Full Term Birth

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) Several students at George Mason University (GMU) signed a petition on Wednesday demanding lawmakers legalize “fourth trimester” abortions.

Full Story

Profits Soar after Nabisco’s ‘Creepy-Ass Cracker’ Market Intro

Tremont, South Dakota – (SatireWorld.com) At their recent shareholders meeting, Nabisco brand stockholders had reason to celebrate after first quarter earnings were surpassed by industry earnings estimates by nearly 200%!

Full Story

Valarie Jarrett: ‘America Safer Because of Gays’

The Pentagon – (SatireWorld.com) The Pentagon on Tuesday toasted gays in the military, with a top adviser to President Obama declaring the country is “safer” now that homosexuals may serve openly.

Full Story

HHS Sebelius: ‘Obamacare Will Favor Gays Over Straight People

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius on Monday said that members of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered community will be a special focus of Obamacare because “for too long they were pushed to the side.”

Full Story

Boy Scouts Allow Gay Scouts!

Grapevine, Texas – (SatireWorld.com) After lengthy and wrenching debate, local leaders of the Boy Scouts of America have voted to open their ranks to openly gay boys for the first time, but heated reactions from the left and right made clear that the BSA’s controversies are far from over.

Full Story

When Asked About a 12 Year Old and An Adult Relationship, An Algerian TV Iman Justifies Pedophilia

Camel Dung, Algeria – (SatireWorld.com) Chems Eddine, a popular television imam in Algeria, had this to say when presented with the case of a 37-year-old man “in love” with a 12-year-old girl:

Full Story

NASA to Lasso Asteroid

WASHINGTON — (SatireWorld.com) NASA is planning for a $100 million dollar US manned space venture in order to lasso a small asteroid and park it near the moon for astronauts to ride on, a top senator revealed Friday.

Full Story

‘Jumping Joe’ Biden to meet Pope Francis in Rome As Official US Emissary

The Vatican, Rome – (SatireWorld.com) Vice President Biden will lead the U.S. delegation to the installation of Pope Francis, an administration official confirmed today. The ceremony is expected to take place in Rome on Tuesday. Biden is both the highest-ranking Catholic official in the United States and the first-ever Catholic vice president.

Full Story

Brit Report Reveals..Pedophile Jimmy Savile Once Worked at a Famous Brewery!

London(UK) – (SatireWorld.com) The latest disclosures from the London Stock Exchange shocked stockholders of a world-famous brewery who thought their holdings were squeaky clean, but revealtions have sent stock prices tumbling when it was learned infamous pedophile and pervert Jimmy Savile not only worked there part-time as a beer keg bung-hole sealer.

Full Story

Second Annual Eat-A-Turd-For Mohammed Day Draws Big Crowds In Afghan’s Helmand Province

Afghanistan Tribal Areas-(SatireWorld.com) In the remote tribal areas of eatern Afghanistan the Taliban declared today as the second annual "Eat A Turd For Mohammed Day" hoping to capitalize on recent events that show American forces leaving soon and the threat of reprisals against one-time Afghan/American allies proving more to be a legitimate concern.

Full Story

President To Put On Skeet Shooting Exhibition By Attempting To Shoot Apple Off Debbie Wasserman-Schultz’s Head!

Camp David, MD – (SatireWorld.com) Feeling the heat from pro-hunting and gun ownership groups the President has arranged for a publicized skeet shoot where he will attempt to shoot an apple off the head of Debbie Wasserman-Schultz using his own personal Benelli 12 gauge shotgun using number 6 shot. According to press secretary Jay Carney, […]

Full Story