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Olympic Gold Medalist Michael Phelps Expelled From Olympics For Urinating In The Pool
London(UK) – (SatireWorld.com) When you have to go, well, you just have to go! But for Olympic record gold medalist Michael Phelps a tell tale yellow stream lead to his expulsion from future competitions in any Olympic-sized pool.
Full StoryCongressman Wants Navy to Name New Ship After Gay Activist
San Diego, CA – (SatireWorld.com) In the land of fruits, nuts, and flaming assholes, a movement to name a US Navy warship after a gay activist has gained momentum after Rep. Bob Filner called on the Navy to name a ship after slain gay rights pioneer Harvey Milk, who served as a Navy officer in [...]
Full StoryPacking Error Causes Concerns For International Space Station Astronauts
Dorkistan Rocket City – (SatireWorld.com) It was revealed today that last weeks Russian supply mission to the space station resulted in a packaging error where thousand of doses of the popular male sex enhancement drug Viagra was sent to unsuspecting astronauts circling the Earth in the International Space Station.
Full StoryTempers Flare As Police Mistake Obama Supporters For Zombies
Foreskin, IL – (SatireWorld.com) Local Foreskin police were tagged, as racist and quick-on-the-gun, after a hastily formed riot squad descended upon a gathering of Barack Obama supporters assembling in a local park.
Full StoryIranian Government’s ‘Monkey Into Space’ Launch Fails
Tehran, Iran – (SatireWorld.com) The Iranian Space Agency had a major failure in their space programlast month, failing to launch a Rhesus monkey into space. Mohammed the Flying Monkey died in the launch when a major system flaw doomed both rocket and monkey.
Full StoryCompeting Site Forms Ragtag Army Attacks SatireWorld!
London, England – (SatireWorld.com) Scores of drunken and mainly over-the-hill Englishmen launched an unprovoked attack against SatireWorld early this morning. Casualties were reported to be heavy on the English side as patriotic SW defenders threw projectiles made from ‘Dorky Books’ back in defense of their territory. When asked to explain what that particular book was, [...]
Full StoryUFO Deposits Alien Life Form In Hopes Of Helping Democratic Party
Palm Beach, Florida – (SatireWorld.com) In a surprise visit to Debbie Wasserman-Schultz’s office in Palm Beach, Florida, a aircraft described by onlookers as a UFO landed for a brief time and immediately took off leaving a silver clad figure on the sidewalk. Described as ‘alien looking’ the figure immediately went into the Democratic National Committee’s [...]
Full StoryLondon’s Muslim Radicals Plan Moment Of Boisterous Celebration During 9-11 ‘Minute of Silence’ In London
London, England – (SatireWorld.com) On the tenth anniversary of the September 11 attacks, a radical Islamic group hopes to “expose the crimes of the American government,” while showcasing its opinion that the U.S. has lost its battle against terrorism.
Full StoryBrit Officials Regret 2008 Choice Of Physicist Stephen Hawking As Olympic Torch Bearer
Manchester, England – (SatireWorld.com) In 2008, Noted physicist and slow poke Stephen Hawking, took possession of the Olympic Torch in order to lend his personal support in moving the torch through Britain as the famous Olympic Flame made its procession from historic Mt. Olympus in Greece to the 2008 Olympic destination of Beijing China. Stephen [...]
Full StoryUS Company Files Bankruptcy On Atomic Bomb Anniversay
Wall Street – (SatireWorld.com) The Hiroshima Charcoal Briquette Company filed Chapter 11 papers early today in order to seek protection from creditors. Analysts cited a massive failure of the company’s two year old advertising plan in which five million dollars were spent and not a single bag of the charcoal briquettes were sold.
Full StoryObama’s 50th Birthday Bash To Cost Attendees $35K Per Plate..Are You Invited?
Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) Just when things for most middle to low income Americans couldn’t get much worse, President Obama has chosen the first day of the nation’s almost credit default to throw his 50th birthday bash at $35,000 per plate. Of course, he’s combining it with raising money for next year’s Presidential election. Obama’s [...]
Full StoryFedEx Mixup Sends Viagra Shipment To Monestries Around The World
Vatican City – (SatireWorld.com) In an error that has caused an uproar in Papal circles, millions of doses of the popular male sex enhancement drug Viagra were sent to unsuspecting Monks in over two-hundred monasteries worldwide.
Full StoryTSA Warns Airlines Over Possible ‘Surgically Implanted Body Bomb’ Threat
Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) The U.S. government is warning airlines that some terrorists are considering surgically implanting explosives into humans to carry out attacks.
Full StoryAfter Celebrating His Successful Eddie Van Halen Tribute Album, North Korean Leader Kim Jong-Il To Compete On TV’s ‘Dancing With The Stars’
People Democrat Republic of North Korea – (SatireWorld.com) American singer Marie Osmond has reportedly spent three weeks as the guest of North Korea’s strongman Kim Jong-il.
Full StoryChinese 7.8 Magnitude Earthquake Caused By Stacked Currency Falling
Mianyang, China – (SatireWorld.com) A Treasury Department has finally admitted that a great mountain of stacked US dollars toppled due to extreme over-weight and shoddy maintenance procedures. The ensuing crash could be heard for over 1,500 miles.
Full StoryWedding Night Disaster For Conjoined Hilton Twins Daisy and Violet
San Antonio, Texas – (SatireWorld.com) For years the much anticipated Wedding Night consumation was on the minds of the Pissgum twins and the Hilton twins, Daisy and Violet. Careful planning for modesty and romance became a delicate balance as just one of the two sets of conjoined twins planned to marry one another.
Full StoryAirport Security Beefed Up Due To Terror Warnings
Boston, MA – (satireworld.com) The TSA announced a new weapon in the fight against terrorism. All agents will be issued a set of X-ray vision glasses as part of an overall upgrade and proceeds from a grant from DC Comics.
Full StoryOldest British Virgin Celebrates Her 105th Birthday
Cornwall, England – (SatireWorld.com) Clara Meadmore, who celebrates her 105th birthday Saturday, says she knows the secret to a long life….No sex! The retired secretary, who lives in a nursing home in Cornwall, southwestern Britain, says she is still a virgin and has no regrets about it, according to reports in British newspapers and on [...]
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