Harvey Weinstein’s ‘Casting Couch Productions’ Opens School For Public Perversion and Starlet Groping

by on 08/10/17 at 9:57 am

Uncle Touchy  promises to have a 'hands on approach' on the  course curriculum.

Uncle Touchy promises to have a ‘hands on approach’ on the course curriculum.

Reportedly, Harvey Weinstein will lead a class  entitled..' how to object to those No-sayers.'

Reportedly, Harvey Weinstein will lead a class entitled..’ how to object to those No-sayers.’

During an introductory seminar on campus Gwyneth Paltrow will reveal how she really got the  choice leading part in the Academy Award winning movie.......Shakespere in Love

During an introductory seminar on campus Gwyneth Paltrow will reveal how she really got the choice leading part in the Academy Award winning movie…….Shakespeare in Love


Los Angeles, CA – (Satireworld.com)

As part of the GLADD, NAMBLA, and unwanted sexual aggressiveness outreach program, the Harvey Weinstein’s ‘Casting Couch Productions’ School Of Public Perversion and Starlet Groping has received its first installment of a $2 million dollar grant from the California Department of Health and Human Services completing a decades-old search to have the school’s inclusion with-in the federally protected sexual predator community.

School director Yardley ‘Uncle Touchy’ Clements, first opened the school in 1978, but suffered numerous setbacks ranging from a lynching mob incident in 1982 and a rash of arson attempts including the most recent where Uncle Touchy narrowly escaped a Molotov Cocktail thrown at his Prius parked near his private candy stand located near his private playground for kids.

“We welcome Mr. Weinstein’s much needed donation to further enhanced courses on the proper techniques of being a fully certified pervert. The three-month course will attract many who once were apprehensive and feared actively engaging in a lifestyle that is tantamount in current Hollywood circles.”

Clements admits he’s no stranger to controversy. His recent foray into reality TV on the A & E channel proves his point and raised the eyebrows of viewers. The show highlights various segments where the Uncle Touchy character comes to life in the series.The ‘When the Lights Go Out in the School Cloak Room’ segment caused advertisers to complain until GLADD instigated write-in campaign threatened several well national sponsors with a backlash. The series evolves into the part where a training school for perverts and predators forms as told by a certified ‘school safety expert’ Uncle Touchy.

Classes include…’how to dress creepy’ and using treats as a clever way to get kids into your van at night. Certain cautions are given as to why you should never attempt a molestation in the ghetto as you could be shot by a 9 year old quite easily.

In recent years, and along with the integration of gays and lesbians into a protected class status, sexual predators have clamored for inclusion into a special category of Pedophilia.

It started when two Canadian experts saying pedophilia is a sexual orientation that is at least partly wired in the brain, the Toronto Star reported. “It’s become harder and harder to explain pedophilia on just childhood experiences”, says James Cantorelli at the Center for Addiction and Oddities in Mental Health. “It’s either purely biological or a mix of biological and experiential.”

His evidence: Pedophiles are more likely to be shorter, left-handed or ambidextrous, with slightly lower IQs, a childhood head injury that Cantorelli racks up to clumsiness, or even being a coach for Penn State football.

He says sex offenders are different, with less connective tissue in the brain than other criminals. But Cantorelli and a former colleague, Michael Saco, clearly differentiate pedophiles from sex offenders. “Not all sex offenders who target children are pedophiles, and not all pedophiles are sex offenders,” says Saco. “Take Michael Jackson for instance….No one knew what the hell he was all about,” he added.

The Harvey Weinstein School will offer tuition-free courses to blondes with large breasts, cute aspiring actresses, and will feature a 6 minute long welcoming video featuring Weinstein masturbating into a hallway planter.

In fact, websites have cropped up for pedophiles to help them discuss their feelings and try to control them—even if the feelings are biologically rooted. There is even a section on the Democratic National Committee’s website offering help with registering to vote and legal help from the justice Department.



2 Responses to “Harvey Weinstein’s ‘Casting Couch Productions’ Opens School For Public Perversion and Starlet Groping”

  1. Philbert of Macadamia

    Oct 10th, 2017

    Laugh of the day: Hillary and Moochelle claim they didn’t know about Harvey?

  2. Bargis

    Oct 10th, 2017

    …Of course! Even that guy couldn’t possibly be THAT horney!

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