Archive for 'Magazine'
Justin Bieber Poll Shows People Think He’s A Twit
Hollywood,CA – (SatireWorld.com) Pop stars don’t have to worry about poll ratings…or do they? Singer Justin Bieber may still sell out concerts, but the young pop star’s penchant for headline-grabbing behavior is causing his poll numbers to plummet.
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, I saw this joke the other day about how to give a cat a bath. It said that you shoved the cat in the toilet and then sat on the lid. You flushed to get the cat wet, then squirted some soap into the crack between the seat and the bowl, [...]
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, Who would win in a fight: Aunt Jemima or Mrs. Butterworth?
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, Me and the fellers were talking and decided that you need some kind of catchphrase. You know, like Coke says “It’s the real thing” and mottos like that.
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, Did you know that there was a town called Liberal, Kansas? Is that where folks like Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid and Obama come from? Does Chris Matthews get a thrill up his leg whenever he drives through there?
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, I done something mean to some of them yellow bellied, lilly livered, tofu fartin’, pinko, commie yankees and I don’t know if I oughtta confess to the cops or sumthin’. What do you think?
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, When I was in junior high and high school, we used to give wedgies to the nerds and stuff them into lockers. In college, our frat used to throw waterballons at the science buildings.
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, We was watching some old cartoons the other day and there was this one about a penguin named Tennessee Tuxedo.
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, Back about thirty years or so, there was this song called “You Light Up My Life.” It was sung by this real pretty blond girl that was the daughter of Pat Boone.
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, I demand my money back cuz they are lying and it’s false advertising!
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, With all of the government regulations on food and the F.D.A. and such, I wonder how they are able to get away every year with selling cookies made out of Girl Scouts?
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, The other day, I heard someone talk about doing “The Agony and the Ecstacy” after work with a buddy.
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, I heard these people using this expression “well I’ll be dipped in s–t.”
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, The other day, I accidentally cut off this old man in a Walmart parking lot. Then, I ran faster and took the last grocery cart (that I could see he was heading towards). After that, he was behind me in the Express lane and I clearly had a lot more than [...]
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, The other day when I was at the bait shop, this feller was talking about something called “Bass Ackwards.”
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, The other day, some of the fellers told me that I was “pussywhipped” because I do everything that my wife wants me to do.
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, A few years back, ever’body was talking about all the 86′s on your computer. My 186 got passed up by the 286 and along came the 386 and then the 486 to replace those. Somewhere’s along the line, they stopped talking about them 86′s and started talking about animals and food [...]
Full StoryThrockmorton P. Turdblossom “The Country Boy Advice Column”
Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom, There used to be all these television commericals on when I was a kid about “ring around the collar” and special cleaning products you could use to take care of it.
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