Archive for 'Science & Tech'

Transgender Conversion Machine Patented

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) US Patent Number 93409353 was issued to Dr. Virginia Phallus for a Transgender Conversion Machine (TCM). Dr. Phallus has a Medical degree (specializing in Reproductive Systems) from Johns Hopkins University and both Electronics and Mechanical Engineering degrees from George Washington University.

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Monday’s Solar Eclipse ‘A Kick Up The Ass’ For America’s Anal Bleaching Profession

Los Angeles, California – (SatireWorld.com) Astrologers studying Monday’s upcoming solar eclipse are bullish about the impact on West Coast anal skin lightening facilities according to an authoritative op ed.

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South Pole Calderas Fool Global Warming Cabal

Antarctica – (SatireWorld.com) Climate Change hot air suffered yet another blow this weekend following the publication of the Western Antarctic Research Base report about volcanic eruptions under the Ross Ice Shelf.

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Swiss Bank Vault Raid Yields Hundreds Of Nazi-Looted Artworks

Basel, Switzerland – (SatireWorld.com) Swiss police have executed an international search warrant at the headquarters of First Vatican Money-Laundering Bank Of Miracles following a tip-off from the FBI.

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Virtual Reality eSEX the Latest in Internet Technology

Silicon Valley CA – (satireworld.com) Playboy Magazine has announced that the monthly publication (with the titillating centerfolds and intellectual articles) is bringing back pictures of nude women after a short hiatus. Once again marketing managers have proven the old adage “Sex Sells” is still true.

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Antarctica Ice Berg Breakoff Spells Climate Change For California

Los Angeles, CA – (SatireWorld.com) A massive iceberg which broke off from Antarctica’s Larsen Shelf today could spell disaster for Los Angeles if it floats too far north from the Antarctic continent.

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Free College Education and Jobs is the Latest Liberal Mantra

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) After their routing in the 2016 Presidential, Congressional and State wide elections progressive Democrats needed to find other ways to spend taxpayers hard earned dollars.

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Washington DC Metro to be Renamed Washington DC Obama

Washington DC- (SatireWorld.com) The Washington DC City Council has proposed renaming the Washington DC METRO the Washington DC OBAMA after the 44th president, who has derailed democracy in the USA for eight years. Currently the METRO suffers from mismanagement; plagued by breakdowns, failures, accidents and fires; loss of ridership; and fare increases. Long term maintenance […]

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As Global Warming Heats Up Average Vagina Temperatures Drop Worldwide

Copenhagen – (SatireWorld.com) Esteemed scientist and 2008 Nobel Science Award recipient, Dr. Newton J. Blather, issued a startling warning to people everywhere concerning disturbing events he has recorded over the past year…Women and their vaginas around the world are cooling down due to global warming.

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Crappy Crony Capitalism Exposed

Washington DC- (SatireWorld.com) While Crooked Hillary Clinton was Secretary of State (SOS) and also illegally involved in the Bill and Hillary Foundation money laundering scheme she was approached by Jonas Crappy. Mr. Crappy had an idea for a completely automatic, robotic commode, but needed funding. Hillary sent an urgent email, via her illegal home server, […]

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Declining Days of Obama’s Policies, Left on the National Mall

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) Liberal Democrats are in denial, pretending that Crooked lying Hillary lost because of the Electoral College, Russian hacking of voting machines and then retaining out of touch Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) as House Minority Leader. However, Americans are celebrating Republican victories at all levels of government (local, state, federal) by rejoicing […]

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Baltimore City to Ban Fracking

Baltimore MD – (SatireWorld.com) The newly elected Democratic Baltimore Mayor and the City Council are considering a resolution banning Fracking (Hydraulic Fracturing) for natural gas extraction within the city limits. The aim of the new law is to improve the climate, decrease global warming and to improve the health of the city’s residents.

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Hillary Lies, But DNA Doesn’t

Chappaqua NY – (satireworld.com) There has been a compilation of evidence that indicates Hillary Clinton is a pathological liar, who has lied to Congressional Committees and the American people. The most flagrant lies are about the Benghazi Libya Islamic terrorist attack and cover-up, and sending classified TOP SECRET emails over a non-secured home server. President […]

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The Latest Common Core Education Mandate

Washington DC: (satireworld.com) WikiLeaks has released a copy of a draft proposal by the Department of Education to improve the essay writing skills of graduating high school seniors (in their 18th year). The new regulation would apply to all 50 states via a series of practice exams. In order to graduate a similar final exam […]

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US Researchers Find New Elements

Creedmore, CA – (satireworld.com) Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory in California has now identified with certainty the heaviest element known to science.

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Donald J.Trump Promises To Give Hillary ‘First Ride/Last Ride’ On New Air Force One Plane

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) Presidential candidate Donald Trump promised supporters in rural Pennsylvania that when he takes possession of the new Boeing 747 known as ‘Air Force One,’ he’ll give Hillary Clinton her first and last ride back to New York City.

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ILLNESS CONFIRMED! Doctors Report: Hillary Has Advanced Sniffle-less!

New York, NY – (satireworld.com) Doctors at New York’s Presbyterian Hospital report that Hillary Clinton tested positive for an advanced case of Norwegian Sniffle-Less a contagious disease that is spread from hand to person.

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The Real Reason for Obama’s War on Coal

Charleston, WV – (satireworld.com) At a news conference held in this once thriving coal producing state, the founder of WikiLeaks announced that in the coming weeks thousands of Hillary Clinton’s destroyed or non-existent emails will be released. The latest batch of emails concern Hillary Clinton’s failed polygraph tests (lie detector) relative to her obtaining a […]

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NASA Releases Unexplained Occurrences in Space Report

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) The National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) recently released a report summarizing unexplained experiences of US Astronauts, in the last 10 years, while on space missions. Many of the strange occurrences happened during extra-vehicular activities (space walks) and went unreported in the mainstream media, for example.

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Barack Obama Officially a Parasite: Scientists Name Worm After President

Washington, DC (Via AP) It’s no Nobel Peace Prize, but Barack Obama has a new honor to brag about. Scientists have named a parasite after him – and there’s no worming out of it. Meet Baracktrema obamai, a tiny parasitic flatworm that lives in turtles’ blood. A new study officially names the two-inch-long, hair-thin creature […]

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CAUGHT! Cheating Hillary Caught Wearing Wireless Ear Bud During Commander-in-Chief Debate

New York City – (satireworld.com) Forget calling Hillary Clinton ‘Crooked Hillary’ from now on. Since sharp-eyed viewers flooded Twitter with photos of Hillary wearing secretive ear bud during the debate over who’s best suited to lead our armed forces. Yes, folks are now calling her ‘Cheating Hillary.’

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Obama Blames US Senate Rejection of Gun Control Legislation for Causing Oklahoma Earthquake

Hangzhou China- (satireworld.com) US President Barack Obama was snubbed by the Chinese government when Air Force One landed in China for his attendance at the G-20 Economic Summit. He had to exit via the rear door of the airplane without the usual red carpet treatment accorded a visiting foreign head of state.

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Reality TV Show Will Place Celebrities Into Earth Orbit For Six Weeks

Hollywood, CA – (satireworld.com) Reality Pictures Television will introduce a new reality series format on cable TV…’The Milky Way Mission,’ will send celebrities into space on a space craft dubbed ‘Hollywood One’. RPT’s agreement is with the Space Expedition Corporation (SXC), which is launching a space travel program for civilians in late 2017.

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ObamaCare May be Dangerous to Your Health

Washington DC – (satireworld.com) Reports have been simultaneously released by the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) and the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) that indicate male condom materials may cause cancer in humans. A number of brands have been tested and only one has been found to contain asbestos.

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Vegan Cannibals Reported in San Francisco

San Francisco CA – (satireworld.com) A town meeting was held with the San Francisco Board of Supervisors (SFBS) to discuss citizen complaints about coyotes living in the “City by the Bay,” eating small dogs and cats.

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Menstrual Psychosis Dogged Hillary Clinton’s FLOTUS Years

Washington DC – (SatireWorld.com) Abandoned for posterity inside her cavernous punani during the notorious 1992-2000 Clinton/Gore period, a rancid tampon may have been behind almost a decade of the former Fist Lady’s bloody tantrums according to the latest forensic psychiatry report.

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Trump: Hillary’s Lingering Illness Due To Visiting Famous Tijuana Donkey Show in March

New York, New York – (satireworld.com) Reports of bombshell allegations being thrown at Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton concerning ailments that claim she suffers from and her reportedly ‘frequent and secret trips’ to Tijuana, Mexico while she prepared for the primary elections are circulating in media centers across the US.

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Hillary Scares Campaign Crowd In Scranton After 12 Minute Trance-like Stare Into Nothingness

Scranton, PA – (satireworld.com) TV cameras turned away as Hillary had ‘another Hillary moment’ in front of almost 350 supporters in Scranton’s Municipal Arena. What was described by several stunned supporters as ‘a stare into nothingness,’ the Democratic candidate stood frozen on the podium with her face locked in a far away stare toward the […]

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Russian Fleet Photo Displayed At DNC Tribute To US Veterans

Gotta love all those military experts over at the DNC….You know, the same people that want to install an equally clueless Democrat as the new Commander-in-Chief!

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By Jove Its War I Say, War!

London UK- (satireworld./com) Queen Elizabeth II called in the new British Conservative Prime Minister (PM) Theresa May and asked her to convene Parliament for a declaration of war against animal rights activists. The Queen was upset that these silly upstart animal rights activists have insulted my great grandchild, three year old toddler Prince George. He […]

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