Miss Canada Turns Out To Be A Man! Eligibility Denied In Miss Universe Contest

by on 26/03/12 at 5:58 am

Even after over a decade of being 'female' Jenna Talackova still has the urge to belch loudly and pick dingleberries from her ass crack.

Port Dover, Canada – (SatireWorld.com)

According to Bjorn Davies, Port Dover’s national director of Miss Universe Canada, rules state to participate in a Miss Universe franchise pageant each contestant must be a “naturally born female.” This qualification has knocked Miss Universe Canada finalist Jenna Talackova out of competition.

According to Davies, “Talackova claimed on her registration form she was born a female.”

Davies said he suspected otherwise and asked her about it on March 13, when she admitted she was not. She was pulled from the contest that day.

‘She feels like a real girl and she is a real girl. She didn’t expect people to question it,’ Davies said.

‘She was hoping we could put her back in the competition, but the rules are very clear and there’s no way we can go back on it.’

Davies could have had his suspicions confirmed earlier if he had searched for Talackova on Utube and perhaps found a 2010 video at the Miss International Queen transgender/transsexual competition, where Talackova says she knew she was a female at the age of 4 and began hormone therapy at 14.

According to Miss Universe Director of Admissions, Dell Cooley, “It’s not as unusual or as rare as you think. We noticed our son Clyde developing a noticeable “bark” shortly after he turned two years old. We consulted with a number of medical professionals and made what we feel was the right decision for us. At four, Clyde Jr. became Spot the dog. His life span will only be about 14 years now, but he’s happier and the time we have together will be more fulfilling. Except for those damn few wet spots on our carpet.

One Response to “Miss Canada Turns Out To Be A Man! Eligibility Denied In Miss Universe Contest”

  1. Bargis

    Mar 26th, 2012

    Jman must be rolling on the ground

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