New TV Reality Series Places Celebrities Into Earth Orbit

by on 26/09/13 at 11:19 am

Dr. Zarkov puts the finishing touches on the space capsule's tricky control panel moments before he hands control over to Al Sharpton.

Dr. Zarkov puts the finishing touches on the space capsule’s tricky control panel moments before he hands control over to Al Sharpton.

Hollywood, CA – (SatireWorld.com)

Reality Pictures Television will introduce a new reality series format on cable TV…’The Milky Way Mission,’ will send celebrities into space. RPT’s agreement is with the Space Expedition Corporation (SXC), which is launching a space travel program for civilians in 2014. Milky Way Mission, created by SatireWorld’s creative department, features six well-known celebrities living in a special bootcamp where they undergo a rigorous and intensive training program in preparation to become an astronaut.

Each week the stars face a series of extreme physical and mental challenges, with the very first round taking place live at the launch site in Mojave, CA. The series already has been sold to Dutch network Nederland 1, which has commissioned seven hourlong episodes. “For years people have dreamt about the possibility of a show in space,” Bargis Tryhol, chief creative officer, international production at RPT said. “RPT and SatireWorld is now poised to make that dream real.” The new TV space race comes a decade after space first became a hot reality destination with several projects, neither of which took off the ground.

The first round of celebrity contestants include Joy Behr from ABCs ‘the View;’ Rosie O’Donnell, MSNBCs Chris Matthews, Al Sharpton, actors Sean Penn, and Alec Baldwin.

Pilot program: The crew heads to camp. Crew leaders are chosen. Joy breaks a nail. Al Sharpton has trouble zipping his flight suit. The crew heads to the Mojave desert for the launch.

For the series first opening installment, Al Sharpton is chosen as the space capsule commander and he has to convince Rosie O’Donnell to do a 25 minute space walk without a space suit wearing only a ‘fish bowl’ helmet. The crew slams Baldwin for bringing several Playboy magazines aboard. A plague of ‘pressurization farts’ grip Al Sharpton.

Week Two: Sean Penn demands that once the capsules passes over the Caribbean island of Haiti, they will drop 500lbs of food stocks hooked to a parachute. Toilet paper runs critically short and the crew demands that Baldwin donates his Playboy magazines. Sharpton’s farts increase severely. Crew members scramble using duct tape and a scavanged tube to construct a special ass filter for Sharpton.

Week Three: Alec Baldwin demonstrates masturbation in zero gravity. Baldwin makes sandwiches for the crew until they discovered he didn’t wash his hands. Zero gravity once again proves dangerous when Rosie O’Donnell throws up. Sharpton is depressed over having to wear a gas filter and only his underpants.

Week Four: Chris Matthews holds a live televised segment where he blasts FOX news for publishing a poll where fans voted for the one person they’d love to leave in orbit forever (Matthews). Joy Berhr has cramps from eating donuts. The capsule’s port-A-potty stops up leaving Rosie frantic.

Week Five: Joy Behr slams G.W.Bush in a ten minute segment discussing gay issues. Sean Penn asks if the moon really is made of green cheese. Cheese is served for lunch surprising crew members. A special lab demonstration goes wrong and methamphetamine is accidently produced causing legal issues. Sean Penn gets mad when the crew mis-drops the Haiti parachute and it lands in Newark, New Jersey.

Week Six: Rosie’s spacewalk goes horribly wrong. Joy refuses to scrape the flesh off from inside Rosie’s space helmet. A round of flatuation gripes Al Sharpton when his ‘special filter’ ruptures. He blames it on ‘faulty ventilation’. Alec Baldwin forms a improptu cork from some insulation.

The season finale promises at least two celebrities being abducted by aliens and another four more permanently disabled and disfigured.

Tune into cable TV’s Science Channel Sunday nights at 10.



One Response to “New TV Reality Series Places Celebrities Into Earth Orbit”

  1. Jalapenoman

    Sep 26th, 2013

    I really wish they could change this and vote one crew member “off the capsule” each week (:the crew has spoken”) and eject them into space without a flight suit or air tank each week. Ties would result in both being put out the airlock. When down to one person, they would be forced to vote for themselves For a crew of six, you could do the show for seven weeks and then declare a “winner” from the people left!

    If you put an Illinois politician into space on any of these trips, I’m sure that all of the dead astronauts would cast ballots for them (since it is legal for cemetery occupants to vote democrat in Illinois). They would always be the first person voted off!

Leave a Reply