Local Farmer Complains of ‘Sore Nose’ After Visit By History Channel’s American Pickers

by on 23/06/18 at 12:19 pm

Mr Cadfrey says he's forgetting about watching those two Yankee carpetbaggers on TV again and will watch a reality show called 'Botched' instead since they have more boobs and stuff.

Mr Cadfrey says he’s forgetting about watching those two Yankee carpetbaggers on TV again and will watch a reality show called ‘Botched’ instead since they have more boobs and stuff.

One item that the pickers thought would be valuable for a future collector was a 2012 Obama Urinal cake RNC memento

One item that the pickers thought would be valuable for a future collector was a 2012 Obama Urinal cake RNC memento


Dawson, GA-(satireworld.com)

Georgia Farmer Elmer Cadfrey thought Tuesday’s visit by the History Channel’s American Pickers would be a profitable day for him and a chance to unload a lifetime of junk he collected in two of his three large Civil war era barns. Sadly, he spent most of the day down at the Dawson Health Clinic with an ice pack on his nose.

The show’s two stars, Mike Wolfe and Frank Fritz, tried to explain that it really wasn’t their fault that a 1,000 pound Walker’s Snuff sign stored overhead in the dilapidated barn wasn’t properly secured and when slightly moved fell and hit Mr. Cadfrey in his rather large nose.

“After all, it was his sign and it wasn’t worth squat!”

Says Wolfe, “We warned the old dude that we weren’t responsible for any damages and it was clearly spelled out on the History Channel Liability Release that Mr. Cadfrey signed prior to us unloading all that really good shit that we placed randomly in his barn for our later ‘discovery’ while on camera.”

The History Channel’s most successful reality show, American Pickers, takes Wolfe and Fritz around the country as they scour barns, buildings, warehouses, and depots for stores of American Folk Lore and almost forgotten Americana antique items.

If an item they ‘find’ amidst junk, debris, and worthless items somehow meets their show’s collection criteria, and allows a five minute on-camera discussion about its past, they ‘pay’ the owner for the item.

Mr. Cadfrey claims he had plenty of ‘good shit himself’ and they didn’t need to go salting his barn with counterfeit stuff just for the camera’s sake. He felt real regretful now that they picked his nose instead to highlight an installment with a moment of high drama.



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