by Benny the Basket on 01/09/14 at 5:57 am
Yes! Khaki is back! The popular Mohammed’s Jihadist Fashion House has released a full line of Jihadist’s men’s fashion and accessories which were shown at the annual Osama Bin Laden Jihadist Fashion Show in downtown London this past weekend. Coverage of the event was promoted by the British Labour Party as part of the ‘understanding our guests’ programme.
One dynamite new item that will blow the socks off of any trendy wearer, is the new line of TNT Boots by designer Ali Mhammed of Libya. The bulky high heel will hold up to 1 pound of TNT and it’ subdued flat-black color will attract little attention.
Next, is the Pressed Velvet Suicide Vest inspired by the popular ISIS rock star Abul Ramalamadingdong’s hit pop song ‘Killing You Softly Is My Pleasure.’ It’s guaranteed to hold your iPod, and up to 35 pounds of petrex explosive. It’s available in three designer colors. Designed Omar Khalid of Pakistan is new to the fashion scene after spending almost 25 years behind bars for destroying a Christian orphange in Beiruit.
An underwear line by Haji Mohammed’s Fruit Of The Boom is next in line to become one of Jihadist’s most explosive new items this season. Sold in packages of three, the front flap is inscribed with the name of an awaiting virgin in heaven that is pictured patiently waiting with your photo in her hand. The brief-styled underwear has a convenient hidden pouch to further enhance your manliness by inserting up to 180 grams of shaped high explosive.
Fruit of the Boom claims the three-pack is necessary. According to marketing director, Amir Wahli, “Usually the first two pair are stained so bad during trial runs, that a third one is desired by the future martyr.”
The unique, new Self Detonation Hat has certainly blown some minds in past weeks, ever since it was introduced at the Pakistani Turban Wear Trade Show last October by designer Wasli Ali. Embedded with up to 12 pounds of nails, tacks, and hard-to-detect glass fragments, the Detonation Hat earned high praise from scores of young men looking to separate themselves from others.
One of the newest fashion lines that has sparked interest with British youth is the ISIS line of fashion wear complete with face masks, hoods, and sheaths for the apparel owner’s own decapitation blade. The only color presently offered is black and has hidden pockets and bullet-resistant fabric. Several real jihadist designed the line with components taken from battlefield uniforms. The ‘London Edition’ is fashioned by Mohammed Mohammed, a recent convert to Islam who’s real name is Wayne McCorn from Portsmouth who says he’s ready to ‘ship out’ and kill a few Christians over in Iraq.