BREAKING: POTUS rushed to hospital after serious miscalculation leads to epic fall!

by on 04/10/13 at 9:14 am

With 'real' doctors furlouighed due to the Democrat leaderhip's outrageous ego, an actor was brought in to help the President.

With ‘real’ doctors furloughed due to the Democratic leaderhip’s outrageous ego, an actor was brought in to help the President’s condition.

Walter Reed Hospital, MD – (

White House spokes-personage Jay Blarney (sic) admitted under intense questioning by SW Investigative reporter Philbert of Maryland, (POM), that President Obama was taken by ambulance to Walter Reed Army Hospital after ‘a very painful, embarrassing, and possible fatal blow to his legacy as the Deceiver in Chief.’

While Blarney wouldn’t comment further, a spokesman for the hospital said the President was currently in isolation to keep him from being harassed by the surviving veterans of WWII, Korea, and more recently of Iraq, Somalia and Afghanistan
to whom he has continuously shown distain.

Said Nurse Ratchit, “Unfortunately the President is NOT resting comfortably at the current time.
In addition to the physical pain there is some opinion by the staff psychologist that he has suffered possible irreversible damage to his psyche, self esteem, and sense of hubris.”

Reports are now beginning to leak out from the White House from disgruntled staff whose working hours were cut to 28 per week in order to exempt them from “ObamaKare’ and are not happy about losing their ‘vacation time’, sick leave, paternity leave, comp time, and government subsidized union dues.

According to POM, who has intimate access to a serving intern, the accident occurred during a
‘Champaign Summit” with political leaders Reid, Pelosi, Mcconnel and Boner (sic).

“To prove Pelosi’s point that the President was ‘bending over backwards’ to compromise with Republicans, he ‘bent’ a little too far when he closed down all the veteran’s memorials, Mt.Rushmore, the Normandy beaches and cemetery, the PX at Andrews, (while keeping the golf course open) which caused him to step on his dick and pull his groin!”

“Luckily Valerie Jarrett was close by at the President’s side to comfort him when he cried out for his “MAMA” or the situation could have gotten really ugly!”

Ratchet also indicated that Obama had refused all hospital food, and demanded a ‘big whopper’, a double order of fries, and sweet potato pie for dinner.

Reggie Love reportedly was stopped by the Secret Service when he attempted to bring in a baggie of “Hawaiian Gold” and some rolling papers to help him through the pain. The doctor on call relented, and said he did authorize a diluted morphine drip ‘to help the president through the night before his interview with an Obama Authorized Death Panel early in the morning as we could really use his bed for someone who deserves it!”

3 Responses to “BREAKING: POTUS rushed to hospital after serious miscalculation leads to epic fall!”

  1. Philbert of Macadamia

    Oct 4th, 2013

    Just like with sequestration e.g. cancelling White House tours, POTUS is closing very visible and emotional functions of the government like the WWII Memorial as opposed to wasteful/unnecessary parts of the government!

    A furloughed federal worker’s wife indicated that with less money coming in for awhile she had canceled their house cleaning service and gym membership.

    Why can/t POTUS understand this simple concept most Americans know by cutting non-essential federal government spending to avoid deficits or borrowing money?

  2. captain america

    Oct 4th, 2013

    …because in the fed, no one is rewarded for going ‘under budget’ for fear their dept will be cut next year! Don’t think you’ll find that in the small business mindset of people who have to be accountable for their money.
    A friend worked for the Navy as a civilian contract award person..
    at the end of every fiscal year his boss told him how much underbudget they were and invented ways to spend it!

    Nobody in the govt is rewarded for efficiency and competency…
    the old Peter Priciple and the army’s F***up move up…I’ve seen it all
    first hand…Bargis knows…he’ll tell you small business men
    watched every penny, and I worked hard to save my clients (most of whom were mega millionaires) money whether they cared or not…
    just my nature…in the end, at least I could feel good and sleep at night..
    not to mention write S***** for nothing…HAR!

  3. Philbert of Macadamia

    Oct 4th, 2013

    Capt A:

    Yes I know having worked on both sides of the street!

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