by Dick Miles-Long on 23/03/12 at 6:05 amOtradnensky,Siberia – (SatireWorld.com)
The 6-foot wide metal cylinder partially made of titanium steel was found near Otradnensky, a village two thousand miles from Moscow. Locals have labeled it as space junk, a UFO fragment, or the fuel tank of an American ballistic missile. The story changes from bar to bar as spirit fortified Siberians exaggerate the story. The Russian space agency has said the object is not from space, a piece of space technology, nor a missile fragment. It has been evaluated for radiation and none was found.
SatireWorld reports that the object was discovered after locals heard crashing and several loud yells in the woods during a late night in December 2011. Why it is just being reported to the authorities now is unclear but it is currently under police supervision.
One resident, Boris Spinski, claimed the object hit him in the head while he was cutting wood and wants the government to issue him a disability. His story was later discounted as ‘a falsehood perpretrated under inebriation’ after it was found that the object fell at night and even someone as stupid as Spinski wouldn’t be in the woods after dark, especially when the local bars are serving a free buffet.
Head of The Department for Civil Defence and Emergency Situations of the Kuibyshevski, Valery Vasiliev, said part of the fragment was made of ultra strong titanium. Other parts were made from a strange material that glowed.
Finder Sergey Bobrov undertook in an official statement that he would keep the UFO safe in his barn, but locals reported that “police came during the night and secretly removed it without his permission.”
A local police spokesman confirmed the object was now under guard by the force on orders from unspecified authorities.
“You can see inside it, all is open, it’s empty, no danger here. We were asked to take and store it. We brought it here. And now we are going to wait until they come to take it if they need it,” said Sergei Sulein.
87 year old Ludmila Petrokofski smiled a toothless grin and mentioned for the first four weeks she used it to cooked boiled potatoes and winter cabbage. Says Petrokofski, “The soldiers are going to believe that those Martians smell funny once they put that junk into a locked up building.”