Experts Warn: Democratic National Convention Will Be Awash With Gonorrhea and Syphilis Sufferers

by on 06/07/16 at 6:34 pm

Hospital stays for various STD's were on the increase in Democratic strongholds like Philadelphia, Boston, and Los Angeles.

Hospital stays for various STD’s were on the increase in Democratic strongholds like Philadelphia, Boston, and Los Angeles.

Dr. Plebius Crawford who specializes in STD transmission is telling young boys to wear rubber gloves when masturbating in order to curb the diseases transmission.

Dr. Plebius Crawford who specializes in STD transmission is telling young boys to wear rubber gloves when masturbating in order to curb the disease’s rapid transmission.

One symptom is a pained look and real kinky hair say experts.

One symptom is a pained look and real kinky hair say experts.


Burlington, VT – (satireworld.com)

Experts have warned the July DNC Convention is edging towards a “sexual health crisis” following federal cuts to STD testing services, as cases of syphilis and gonorrhea have soared among groups taking prominent positions within the Democratic Party.

New figures released by CDC show 841,193 people professing they were connected to, or voting for, Democrats that were diagnosed with gonorrhea in 2015, representing an increase of 150 per cent over the previous year. 1,205,288 people in the same tested group were diagnosed with syphilis in 2015, a rise of 276% since 2012.

In 2014, almost 94% were diagnosed with chlamydia though health officials say that number may have increased. Health professionals have warned this may be due to a drop in testing of actual cases.

Family Health CEO Natalie H Halal said: “We are concerned by the increased diagnoses rates of gonorrhea and syphilis, particularly among Democratic men who have sex with any and all men. There is a strong link between poorer sexual health – one sign of which is in higher rates of STD diagnoses – and higher levels of sexual deprivation usually found in past DNC convention attendees.”

Folks down at the Democratic National Committee are telling delegates in advance that ‘testing and hand-washing’ facilities will be located on the floor of the convention near food kiosks and the Committee is requesting that everyone use them. Especially if media cameras are nearby, or if you just want to impress a probable date with signs of your inner caring nature.



One Response to “Experts Warn: Democratic National Convention Will Be Awash With Gonorrhea and Syphilis Sufferers”

  1. Bargis

    Jul 6th, 2016

    yuck! disgusting!

Leave a Reply