by Annoying Rash on 13/09/16 at 7:14 am
New York, NY – (satireworld.com)
Doctors at New York’s Presbyterian Hospital report that Hillary Clinton tested positive for an advanced case of Norwegian Sniffle-Less a contagious disease that is spread from hand to person.
Dr. Angus Firth says Hillary has taken the diagnoses well and understands it will be a part of her life for as long as she lives. Cases of Norwegian Sniffle-less are incurable and can take months to properly diagnose using state-of-the-art medical equipment.
“Symptoms are pretty much universal with stumbling and falls attributed to inner-ear balance problems from all the fluid that develops. Fainting is usually an occurrence in advanced stages of the disease with confusion, paranoia, and bouts of exaggeration being the most common side effects,” said Dr. Firth at a hastily convene hospital press conference for the media.
Firth also passed out literature from the Acme Medical and Surgical Supply company that showed a break through apparatus for Sniffle-less sufferers, adding “There’s hope for Hillary and besides the disposable plastic drip cup she can wear around her neck, the Acme product will give her more control over the disease’s most annoying symptoms.”