Harpoon Nearly Misses Sunbathing Hillary As She Starts Hamptons Beachfront Vacation

by on 11/08/14 at 8:23 am

Moments after this photo a harpoon  narrowly missed the ex-secretary and plunged through her handbag

Moments after this photo a harpoon narrowly missed the ex-secretary and plunged through her handbag

The Hamptons, NY – (satireworld.com)

The first day at their humble $100K rental mansion on the Hamptons world famous beach nearly ended in disaster as a nearby whaler mistook Hillary Clinton for a beached blue whale.

Secret service agents formed a protective circle around the ex-secretary as she struggled to get up and ran toward the shelter of a nearby barrier wall. The whaler was detained and questioned for several hours and released with a stern warning and a free case of beer from Bill Clinton.

The whaler, Amos McCord said he was sory but placed the blame squarely on Clinton. “Her bright white cellulited thighs blinded me abit and I thought it was just the reflection of puckery whale skin in the sun. Next time I’ll be more careful.”

Hillary claims she wasn’t shaken up too bad but will be careful sunbathing in the future. Several NO HARPOONING signs were quickly erected at various points on the beach.

Taking heed, Cape Cod vacationer Michelle Obama has cancelled any sunbathing time until at least the local walrus hunting season expires August 21st.



3 Responses to “Harpoon Nearly Misses Sunbathing Hillary As She Starts Hamptons Beachfront Vacation”

  1. Jalapenoman

    Aug 11th, 2014

    Considering the Bengazi mess and the number of mysterious deaths in White Water…. was Hillary mistaken for a “Killer Whale?”

  2. captain america

    Aug 11th, 2014

    ….how could anyone “nearly miss” a target as big as Arkansas?

    Enough pulled pork on the bone to feed a horde of “displaced migrants”
    Despite the threat of swine flu!

  3. E. Williams

    Aug 11th, 2014

    Brilliant! I have seen those pics several times the last few days and you picked a great premise for the article.

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