by E. Williams on 03/12/14 at 6:46 am
ST. LOUIS, MO – (satireworld.com)
Several members of the St. Louis Rams came onto the field before Sunday’s game with the Oakland Raiders showing the flawed narrative gesture, “Hands Up, Don’t Shoot,” and went on to win the game 52-0.
The gesture has been debunked after three autopsy results showed Michael Brown did not have his arms in the air as he was being shot by officer Darren Wilson. Still, this has not stopped Ferguson protesters who are less concerned with the facts of the case than they are at venting their own anger at police.
After the victory over Oakland, the Rams have decided to stay with what works. They have now come up with their own set of gestures they hope will lead them to more wins in the future. The Rams organization has petitioned NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell to ask other teams in the league to respect their new hand signals.
During a game, if their quarterback pulls his arms behind himself, this symbolizes “Hands Back, Don’t Sack” and alerts defensive linemen to back off and let him complete the play. If a wide receiver spreads his arms out wide, this communicates to a cornerback or safety for the opposing team “Hands Outswept, Don’t Intercept.” When a player puts his hands in front of his crotch, this means “Hands Over Jock, Don’t Block.”
Time will tell if other NFL teams will honor the Ram’s new gestures. Ferguson business owners should be so lucky. Their attempts at holding signs in their raised hands which read “Hand’s Up, Don’t Loot” have been totally ignored by Ferguson protesters.