ArchivesTag : ISIS

ISIS Militants Watch the Head Drop on New Year’s Eve

MOSUL – (satireworld.com) Members of the terror group ISIS spent New Year’s Eve celebrating the beginning of a new year of terror attacks and killing by watching the annual head drop in Mosul. The tradition is in its third year and the event is circulated by cellphones and ISIS-controlled TV stations in the region.

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Obama Clarifies ISIS Strategy, Most Serious Stance Yet

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) In a press conference today, President Obama laid out his latest vision for defeating terror in the Middle East and restoring a feeling of safety among Americans here at home. The president seemed more serious in his remarks today, and his rhetoric was the harshest he’s used on the subject to date.

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Obama vows to increase unemployment to curb workplace violence!!

The White House – (satireworld.com) On his national address scheduled for later in the day from the White House the President is ready to unleash his latest plan to thwart ISIS and radical terrorism by increasing American unemployment to reduce the amount of workplace violence blamed for the recent bloodbaths around America!

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First Annual ‘Eat-A-Turd For Mohammed Day’ A Big Success For ISIS in Aleppo Syria

Aleppo, Syria – (SatireWorld.com) In the largest city in western Syria, ISIS declared today as the official "Eat A Turd For Mohammed Day." Swarming into the city and nearby villages the armed ISIS fighters forced inhabitants to consume plates of turds at gunpoint in order to show their"true submission to Mohammed"….said Ziki Al-Ghabouni, a spokesman […]

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Hillary, Obama Say Just Ignore ISIS and They’ll Go Away

IOWA – (satireworld.com) Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama have this whole terrorism thing figured out. So today, Mrs. Clinton echoed the president’s sentiment in a speech, saying Muslims have nothing to do with terrorism whatsoever. She also told the crowd that life is so much more fun and carefree when you live in denial.

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Obama Mulls Putting ‘Republicans on the Ground’ in ISIS Fight

TURKEY – (satireworld.com) Sticking to his strategy of no “boots on the ground” in the fight against ISIS, President Obama now says he is examining what he called “an interesting option” that could potentially take the place of his current strategy, which is military paralysis. The president has been looking for years for a military […]

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Honduras Intercepts Syrian ‘Orphans and Widows’ Using Fake Passports to Enter US

Tegucigalpa, Honduras – (satireworld.com) Police in Honduras have arrested five Syrian widows with their orphaned children who were travelling on stolen Greek passports and reportedly intended to enter the US by land. The five were detained after arriving on a flight from neighboring El Salvador on Tuesday night, police said.Honduran special police force spokesman Anibal […]

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Obama Plans All-Out Skirmishes With ISIS

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) Not since General Patton has America witnessed such a brilliant military strategist as Barack Obama. Since the dawn of man, civilizations have fought and defeated their enemies through sheer force by any means necessary. No matter how violent, how brutal, a war wasn’t over until one side was beaten into submission.

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Syrian Dating Site ‘Ashley Martyrdom’ Hacked, Subscribers Outed

MOSUL – The popular Middle Eastern dating site, Ashley Martyrdom, has been hacked and the identities of thousands of ISIS subscribers have been revealed. The outing of many militant fighters has caused much infighting within the ranks of the terror group and sparked a fierce debate over what kind of punishments should be handed out […]

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ISIS Vows To Stone-to-Death All 33 Million Ashley Madison Subscribers For Adultery

Mosul, Iraq – (satireworld.com) The depraved terrorists of Islamic State (ISIS) reportedly are planning to stone to death all married men and women death who have subscribed to the adultery site Ashley Madison. The announcement was broadcast today from the Iraqi city of Mosul during a regular ISIS news show. In the past the ISIS […]

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Hillary’s dark web trolling cached on private server

New York – (satireworld.com) By Oleg Penkovsky Bin Laden-Sotero For years a Fuxnet computer worm incubating in her private email server quietly harvested Clinton’s psychotic rants, mostly to Mullah Mohammed Omar, the now dead Afghani stand-up comedian-cum-former Taliban war lord.

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Trouble in Paradise, “Jihadi John” Now on Run From ISIS

SYRIA – (satireworld.com) Once the poster boy for the evil of ISIS, the man credited with killing numerous hostages held by the terror group is reportedly now on the run from the very group that made him a star. According to the Jerusalem Post, John is in hiding, probably within a different JV terror group. […]

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Josh Earnest Says ‘White House Hasn’t Discounted Using Nukes To Combat ISIS’

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) In the wake of a surprise announcement from the White House over the re-deployment of 450 US troops to Anbar Province in Iraq, Press Secretary Josh Earnest was quoted as saying the President has finally come up with a strategy to combat ISIS which includes using B-52 bombers and strategic nuclear […]

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Obama-Let Me Be Perfectly Clear About Climate Change

New London CT – (satireworld.com) President Obama speaking at the Coast Guard Academy graduation ceremony warned the new graduate Ensigns of climate change (global warming by a politically correct name) as a threat to US national security. The president tied severe weather to the rise of the extremist group Boko Haram in Nigeria, the civil […]

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ISIS Furious That Winning Drawing at Muhammad Cartoon Event ‘Wasn’t Even That Good’

GARLAND, TX – (satireworld.com) Now that the controversy over the Draw Muhammad event in this Texas city has subsided for the moment, Muslim scholars and members of ISIS are reacting with outrage that the drawing chosen as the winning entry “wasn’t even that good,” with some even saying that it sucked.

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ISIS Terrorists Threaten Little Caesar’s Pizza Over Bacon-Wrapped Pizza

OKLAHOMA CITY  – (satireworld.com) Just a week after attempting to murder civilians at a Draw Muhammad cartoon event, ISIS is threatening to launch terrorist attacks on Little Caesar’s Pizza locations over their new bacon-wrapped pizza. It appears the terrorist organization has decided to destroy everything they disagree with in America.

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#NOT READY FOR HILLARY!

Realizing that it’s only April I began to shutter in HORROR as it dawned on me we will be bombarded ad nausea with projectile vomiting, lying, vile invectives from the LEFT as we head into the Presidential election debacle.

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Liberals Admire the Destructive Efficiency of ISIS in Middle East

DETROIT – (satireworld.com) If you look around America at cities that are going bankrupt, have dilapidated housing projects, and have huge numbers of their citizens moving away in search of a better life elsewhere, they all share a common thread – they were all destroyed by the utopian dreams of liberalism. Detroit is the shining […]

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Rudy Giuliani Now Reveals the President Has a Little Dick Too

NEW YORK CITY – (satireworld.com) Speaking to a group of conservatives just before they all head to CPAC later this week, Rudy Giuliani told a crowd today that President Obama ‘not only doesn’t love America, but the President also has a little dick’. The crowd reacted with little emotion since most conservatives have long suspected […]

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Marie Barf (sic) Moving on as new CEO of Sony!

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) Brain dead 33 year old Marie Harf, spokesbabe for the State Department says she’s accepted a new job as CEO of Sony pictures after being mocked by internet fans who ‘just don’t get my nuances!”

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(satireworld.com) Walter Bucket Presents True Facts……..according to Nopes! #138

(satireworld.com) Walter Bucket Presents True Facts

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State Dept Spox on ISIS: “We Need Less Killing, More Jobs For Them”

WASHINGTON D.C. – (satireworld.com) For reasons why the Untied States is losing the fight with ISIS, one need look no further than the State Department Sorority Girls, Marie Harf and Jen Psaki. Marie Harf was on Hardball with Chris Matthews last night because Jen had a makeup exam at college yesterday. The spot with Harf […]

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Traveling to the Middle East? Better Not Unless You’re Rambo

WASHINGTON D.C. – (satireworld.com) The White House today confirmed the death of American hostage Kayla Mueller who had been held by JV terror group ISIS since August 2013. Details of Mueller’s death have been mysteriously kept secret so far, a stark difference from previous hostage deaths which have been videotaped and widely distributed by the […]

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Time Travel Back to the Future With Barack and Doc

HILL VALLEY – (satireworld.com) Slowing his DeLorean as he cruised down Main Street, Doc Brown, known from the Back to the Future films, pulls to the curb alongside President Barack Obama as he strolls down the sidewalk.

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During Obama’s SOTU Speech National B-S Meter Hits All-Time High

Washington, DC- (satireworld.com) In America, the President of the United States is required by law to give an annual report to both Houses of Congress and to the American people. It’s during this time the President’s truthfulness is also monitored by the American people who basically are listening to a one-sided report by the President […]

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Talks Begin On First US Islamic State Locating In New York City

New York City, NY – (satireworld.com) Radical UK imam Anjem Choudary has made a name for himself as one of the most media friendly radical Islamists in the West, semi-regularly calling for the imposition of Sharia law in both the US and in the UK where he presently resides. Recently on Fox News’s Hannity he […]

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Hell Posts Temporary “No Vacancy” Sign After Hebdo Killers Show Up Today

HELL – (satireworld.com) The Devil is complaining that Hell is getting too full of Islamic terrorists who insist on killing innocent people that don’t share their same worldview. He hung up a temporary “No Vacancy” sign outside the entrance after accepting the souls of the latest terrorists from France.

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Texas Plumber’s Old Truck Being Used For Warfare by ISIS

TEXAS CITY, TX – (satireworld.com) The owner of Mark-1 Plumbing was surprised when he was alerted to a picture on Twitter showing Islamic Jihadists using one of his old trucks to wage warfare on its opponents in the Middle East. Mark Oberholtzer said he didn’t understand how his old truck ended up in Syria or […]

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After Bashing Americans, Gruber Sets Sights on Insulting ISIS

WASHINGTON D.C.  – (satireworld.com) Fresh off video evidence he called Americans “too stupid to understand Obamacare,” Jonathan Gruber is turning his attention to embarrassing and insulting Middle East terrorist group ISIS.  “The President thought I did such a bang-up job belittling the American voter that he wants me to take cheap shots at ISIS too,” […]

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BISIS Continues Fabulous March Across Iraq

TIKRIT, IRAQ – (satireworld.com) Not wanting to be left out of the carnage, BISIS (Bisexuals of Islamic State in Syria) is continuing its sashay across this country and looking fabulous doing it. Yes, I know homosexuality is slightly frowned upon in the Middle East but, if you don’t indulge my premise, this article is really […]

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