ArchivesTag : obama

Lee Harvey Oswald Traveled To Cuba To Witness Barack Obama Nativity Assassination Files Reveal

Havana, Cuba – (SatireWorld.com) “Like second coming of Three Wise Men,” Gordo Bastardo, former governor of Havana’s notorious Pudenda Enorma women’s jail told SatireWorld reporters as newly released JFK assassination files went viral today.

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Trump Signs Four Executive Orders in His Sleep

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) President Trump is in the zone. He’s come out of the gate at full speed during his first week in office. Following a flurry of executive orders that were needed to begin repairing the damage that was the Obama presidency, Trump is a dynamo.

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Spooky How Trump Hires Cousin Joe To Raise Deportation Posse

Maricopa County, Arizona – (SatireWorld.com) “First thing we gonna do is deport Barack Obama back home to Jamaica,” Maricopa County’s recently deposed sheriff Joe Arpaio said today amid news of his latest appointment as President Trump’s Homeland Insecurity enforcer. As foretold by some guy called Nostradamus in the year 1289.

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Pentagon To Repeal Ban on Transgender Troops

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) Men who pretend they are women, and women who pretend they are men, will be able to serve openly in America’s military services as early as next week.

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Obama Plans to Apologize to Japan for Roosevelt Dropping F-Bomb

HIROSHIMA – (satireworld.com) Later this month, President Obama will make a trip to the site of the world’s most famous bomb blast, to make an apology for former President Roosevelt dropping a more powerful bomb. The F-bomb.

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Obama Warns Trump: “This Ain’t No Party, This Ain’t No Disco”

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) President Obama lectured reporters and Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump today that the presidency is a serious job, and not just some reality show.

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Obama Calls Putin to Discuss Transgender Bathroom Crisis

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) With the world in a precarious state from threats of terrorism, China’s economy on shaky ground, Iran getting nuclear weapons, and military skirmishes with other countries that continue to embarrass the United States, President Obama placed a call to Russia’s President Putin today.

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In America’s Heartland Bernie Saunders and the Left Suffer From Electile Dysfunction

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) Webster’s Dictionary recently added a new phrase that pretty much sums up the problems faced the Democratic Party today as the 2016 elections roll ever closer. Eloquently said, the new phrase has captured the imagination of conservative pundits as the predominate adjective used most often on television to describe the situation […]

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Obama Pulls Muscles, Tears Tendon in Gun Move

WASHINGTON D.C. – (satireworld.com) White House doctors have confirmed that President Obama strained several muscles in his arms today, and even tore a tendon in his shoulder area, while overreaching in putting together his newest gun control executive orders. The president has been ordered to rest his skinny arms and reduce the movement of his […]

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Steve Harvey Apologizes: “Mitt Romney Was the Winner in 2012”

LOS ANGELES – (satireworld.com) Embarrassed Family Feud and Miss Universe pageant host, Steve Harvey, is continuing to cleanse his conscience following his recent gaffe in announcing the wrong winner in the famous beauty contest. Harvey announced Ms. Colombia as the winner, when the real winner was Ms. Philippines, a mix-up that became a television nightmare.

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Trump Aims to Restructure Branches of Government

NEW YORK CITY – (satireworld.com) Speaking from his luxury Trump Tower office this week, Donald Trump promised supporters that, if elected, he would restructure the American government system to bring it more in line with what our Founding Fathers envisioned. Today’s government is nothing like the one that made America the strong nation it once […]

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Obama Clarifies ISIS Strategy, Most Serious Stance Yet

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) In a press conference today, President Obama laid out his latest vision for defeating terror in the Middle East and restoring a feeling of safety among Americans here at home. The president seemed more serious in his remarks today, and his rhetoric was the harshest he’s used on the subject to date.

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President Unveils Muslim Protection Program: ObamaCAIR

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) Following his “Please Pardon the Muslims” speech last week, in which Mr. Obama vowed not to change a thing in his imaginary war with ISIS, the president announced his latest, government-mandated program. In conjunction with the Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR), Obama, using his favorite tools, his pen and his phone, has […]

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Obama Demands Ammunition Manufacturers Develop Slower Bullets

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) In his infinite wisdom and attempt to thwart mass shootings by Muslims so the American people don’t get upset with them, President Obama said today that he had come up with a workable solution to all the gun control hysteria that he himself has stirred up. He has demanded that gun manufacturers […]

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Obama: “Don’t Worry About Refugees, They Don’t Radicalize Once Here”

WASHINGTON D.C. – (satireworld.com) Trying to put American’s fears to rest about the possibility of bringing tens of thousands of Muslim refugees into the country from Syria, President Obama reassured the nation today that there wouldn’t be any problems with his plan because Muslims “just don’t radicalize once they get here.”

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Paris: Obama Warns World About Climate Change, Space Aliens, Republicans

PARIS – (satireworld.com) President Obama has concluded two days of making a fool of himself at the climate summit here. Warning the world of the dangers of magic warming gas in our atmosphere, the president painted an apocalyptic vision of the future if the world doesn’t start believing his climate hysteria. Immediately. There is not […]

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Have a Happy Liberal Thanksgiving

The Heartland… For most people, Thanksgiving is a day for family, giving thanks, food, and football. For some, it means early shopping after the big meal. But for liberals, Thanksgiving is a time to gather families together and then alienate each other. It’s a sacred holiday because of the indoctrination and propaganda opportunities it affords […]

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Hillary, Obama Say Just Ignore ISIS and They’ll Go Away

IOWA – (satireworld.com) Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama have this whole terrorism thing figured out. So today, Mrs. Clinton echoed the president’s sentiment in a speech, saying Muslims have nothing to do with terrorism whatsoever. She also told the crowd that life is so much more fun and carefree when you live in denial.

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Obama: “Chill, Refugee Vetting Database Run by Same Company That Did Obamacare Website”

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) President Obama, tired of hearing critics “pop off” about his plan to import tens of thousands of future Democratic voters from Syria, is trying to allay fears that the vetting process for incoming refugees is not adequate enough.  He said the process need not be made more complicated by Congress.

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Obama Mulls Putting ‘Republicans on the Ground’ in ISIS Fight

TURKEY – (satireworld.com) Sticking to his strategy of no “boots on the ground” in the fight against ISIS, President Obama now says he is examining what he called “an interesting option” that could potentially take the place of his current strategy, which is military paralysis. The president has been looking for years for a military […]

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Honduras Intercepts Syrian ‘Orphans and Widows’ Using Fake Passports to Enter US

Tegucigalpa, Honduras – (satireworld.com) Police in Honduras have arrested five Syrian widows with their orphaned children who were travelling on stolen Greek passports and reportedly intended to enter the US by land. The five were detained after arriving on a flight from neighboring El Salvador on Tuesday night, police said.Honduran special police force spokesman Anibal […]

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SATIREWORLD’S……… Photo of the Day

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) I wonder how you vape using a cigarette holder?

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Obama Plans All-Out Skirmishes With ISIS

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) Not since General Patton has America witnessed such a brilliant military strategist as Barack Obama. Since the dawn of man, civilizations have fought and defeated their enemies through sheer force by any means necessary. No matter how violent, how brutal, a war wasn’t over until one side was beaten into submission.

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Amid Gun Control Hysteria, Obama Calls For Ban On Shotgun Weddings

OREGON – (satireworld.com) Determined to circumvent Congress, President Obama has decided on his first executive order related to gun control. He’s ordering a ban on shotgun weddings, typically defined as any wedding that takes place quickly, usually to avoid embarrassment because of a pregnancy.

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Obama ‘The Martian’ Opens To Rave Reviews

By Oleg Penkovsky Mars, The Solar System – (satireworld.com) Dramatic footage has just been released of NASA Mars Rover’s coverage of the 2014 Presidential inauguration of the United States Embassy on Mars. Featuring resplendent diplomatic pageantry at the legation’s newly opened Mars Walk of Fame Handprints Mall the footage kicks off with Obama flanked by […]

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Mental Health and Gun Control

Vienna Austria – (satireworld.com) Dr. Sigmund Freud III spoke before the Austrian Psychology Association (APA) on the 135th anniversary of the founding of Psychological Research. The meeting was held at the Kursalon Vienna Concert Hall. The attendees were the notables of the psychology world and all 1744 seats of the main hall were filled, plus […]

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Obama Gathers Top Brass For Game of RISK to Plan Syria Strategy

WASHINGTON D.C. – (satireworld.com) Desperate to find some kind of strategy for dealing with Syria, now that Russian President Putin has caught the Obama administration without a plan, President Obama summoned his top military advisers to the White House today for a high-stakes game of RISK in hopes of coming up with a plan.

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Putin Assumes Control in Middle East But Can’t Take Selfies For Sh*t

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) Russian President Putin has launched airstrikes in Syria, effectively neutering President Obama and his weak Middle East policy. While Mr. Obama’s policy has been to destroy the part of ISIS that is neither Islamic nor extremist by playing tiddlywinks, Putin is using firepower, kicking ass and taking names.

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Breakthrough Memory Implants Make it Possible to Forget Obama Was Ever President

LOS ANGELES – (satireworld.com) A scientific breakthrough has given tens of millions of conservatives a glimmer of hope – it may soon be possible to completely forget Barack Obama was ever elected President of the United States in the first place. This current reality, in which a community organizer has brought shame on the greatest […]

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Pope Presser Awkward Because Obama Keeps Answering to ‘His Holiness’

WASHINGTON D.C. – (satireworld.com) It was a confusing and awkward meeting today when two of the most famous men on the planet, one held in high regard by Catholics and the other worshiped by Democrats, held a joint press conference that was at best uneven, highlighted by starts and stops.

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