ArchivesTag : terrorists

FBI Court Order ‘Bombs’ As San Bernardino Gunman’s iPhone ‘Possibly Booby Trapped’

Los Angeles, California – (Satireworld) Decryption of a terrorist’s iPhone via a custom-built malware program could blow up in the Bureau’s face according to latest intelligence reports.

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Obama Demands Ammunition Manufacturers Develop Slower Bullets

WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com) In his infinite wisdom and attempt to thwart mass shootings by Muslims so the American people don’t get upset with them, President Obama said today that he had come up with a workable solution to all the gun control hysteria that he himself has stirred up. He has demanded that gun manufacturers […]

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Obama vows to increase unemployment to curb workplace violence!!

The White House – (satireworld.com) On his national address scheduled for later in the day from the White House the President is ready to unleash his latest plan to thwart ISIS and radical terrorism by increasing American unemployment to reduce the amount of workplace violence blamed for the recent bloodbaths around America!

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Honduras Intercepts Syrian ‘Orphans and Widows’ Using Fake Passports to Enter US

Tegucigalpa, Honduras – (satireworld.com) Police in Honduras have arrested five Syrian widows with their orphaned children who were travelling on stolen Greek passports and reportedly intended to enter the US by land. The five were detained after arriving on a flight from neighboring El Salvador on Tuesday night, police said.Honduran special police force spokesman Anibal […]

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Josh Earnest Says ‘White House Hasn’t Discounted Using Nukes To Combat ISIS’

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com) In the wake of a surprise announcement from the White House over the re-deployment of 450 US troops to Anbar Province in Iraq, Press Secretary Josh Earnest was quoted as saying the President has finally come up with a strategy to combat ISIS which includes using B-52 bombers and strategic nuclear […]

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ISIS Terrorists Threaten Little Caesar’s Pizza Over Bacon-Wrapped Pizza

OKLAHOMA CITY  – (satireworld.com) Just a week after attempting to murder civilians at a Draw Muhammad cartoon event, ISIS is threatening to launch terrorist attacks on Little Caesar’s Pizza locations over their new bacon-wrapped pizza. It appears the terrorist organization has decided to destroy everything they disagree with in America.

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Hell Posts Temporary “No Vacancy” Sign After Hebdo Killers Show Up Today

HELL – (satireworld.com) The Devil is complaining that Hell is getting too full of Islamic terrorists who insist on killing innocent people that don’t share their same worldview. He hung up a temporary “No Vacancy” sign outside the entrance after accepting the souls of the latest terrorists from France.

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Texas Plumber’s Old Truck Being Used For Warfare by ISIS

TEXAS CITY, TX – (satireworld.com) The owner of Mark-1 Plumbing was surprised when he was alerted to a picture on Twitter showing Islamic Jihadists using one of his old trucks to wage warfare on its opponents in the Middle East. Mark Oberholtzer said he didn’t understand how his old truck ended up in Syria or […]

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Karl Rove on CIA Interrogation Report: “Who Doesn’t Enjoy a Good Rectal Feeding?”

NEW YORK CITY – (satireworld.com) This morning on Fox News Channel, RINO anal-yst Karl Rove spoke fondly of the methods reportedly used by the CIA in their treatment of terrorists in US custody. “Let’s be real,” Rove said to Chris Wallace, “Who among us doesn’t enjoy a good rectal feeding? I’m a huge fan of […]

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(satireworld.com) Walter Bucket Presents: TRUE FACTS……..according to Nopes! #84

(satireworld.com) Walter Bucket Presents: TRUE FACTS

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BISIS Continues Fabulous March Across Iraq

TIKRIT, IRAQ – (satireworld.com) Not wanting to be left out of the carnage, BISIS (Bisexuals of Islamic State in Syria) is continuing its sashay across this country and looking fabulous doing it. Yes, I know homosexuality is slightly frowned upon in the Middle East but, if you don’t indulge my premise, this article is really […]

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Afghanistan’s First Gay Pride Day Falls Flat With Quiet Kabul Crowds

Kabul, Afghanistan-(SatireWorld.com) A gay activist group from San Francisco’s Mission District organized a recent ‘Kiss-in’ and ‘Gay Pride Day Parade in downtown Kabul to protest the repeated efforts by the Taliban to ban homosexuality. Over 7,503 brave, gay activists boarded buses, jeeps, and trucks and drove the 350 miles from the Pakistan town of Ceanzi […]

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SatireWorld Exclusive: ‘An Interview With the Elusive ISIS Leader Caliph al-Baghdadi’

Tikrit, Iraq – (satireworld.com) As the leader of the world’s most feared and brutal terrorist organization ISIS, Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi emerged from hiding hoping to strike fear into his western opponents by wearing all black and forcefully commanding all those devoted to Islam globally to bend to his will by acknowledging him as their supreme […]

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DNC Chairwoman Debbie Wasserman-Schultz Called ‘ Smelly Douchebag’ By Fellow Democrat

Washington, DC- (SatireWorld.com) Congresswoman Debbie Wassertman-Schultz (D-FL)has again put her size eleven clodhopper in her mouth after she falsely accused one time buddy Allan Greyson (D-FL) of attempting to ruin Obamacare by trying to unbalance the budget screwed up by President Barack Obama and addressing the National Debt ceiling.

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Mexican Coyotes Organize Illegal Travel Agency For Latino Border Jumpers

San Diego, CA – (SatireWorld.com) Having already taken over all of South and Central America, the Latino population of the New World now have their sights on taking over all of the northern hemisphere as well, as thousands are poised at border jump over points waiting to take advanatge of the Obama amnesty efforts.

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ISIS, ISIL Reeling Psychologically After Obama Says They Aren’t Islamic

Mosul, Iraq – (satireworld.com) Reports are becoming widespread out of this area that thousands of ISIS militant fighters are wandering the desert, searching for meaning after finding out from President Obama, in his latest speech, that they are not indeed, Islamic.

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President Obama Decrees “ISIS Beheadings Should be Safe, Legal and Rare”

Estonia – (satireworld.com) Speaking from a NATO conference in this eastern European country, President Obama likened the horrific beheadings seen around the world on social media at the hands of ISIS militants to that of abortions in the United States – the practice should be safe, legal and rare.

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A US Marine Vet Says…’Isis Come and Get It!’

(satireworld.com) Some guys have a way with words and can express themselves easily. Others simply hold it in until an act of such wanton savagery causes them to speak out and protest. With ex-marine Nick Powers he sums it up really well and gets right to the point about Isis and their claims of bloodying […]

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Women in Missionary Positions Living in Islamic Countries Warned of Dangers

Cairo, Egypt – (SatireWorld.com) The U.S. Embassy in Cairo has issued a warning for American females taking traditional missionary positions while serving in the middle east, saying they could be targets for terrorists. “The Embassy has credible information suggesting terrorist interest in targeting U.S. females in Egypt and in Syria,” a message posted on the […]

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PHOTO OF THE DAY

Gee! Poor CAIR. Day after day trying to sell Islam to sensible folks who see it for what it is…nothing more than a cult run by lunatics who still party like it’s 799 AD.

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Sec. John Kerry…’Army’s First All Gay Brigade Deploying To Help Iraq Repel ISIS Forces’

US ARMY HEADQUARTERS,Iraq – (SatireWorld.com) Secretary of State John Kerry lived up to his promise by including gay and lesbian soldiers as part of the State Department’s security outreach program where gay, lesbian, and transgendered security employees will be dispatched to trouble spots around the globe. The Fighting 69th Brigade has begun to land troops […]

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The Three A.M. Call: “Iraq is burning, anybody know where the President is Sleeping these days?”

US Embassy,Baghdad – (satireworld.com) Frantic calls from the US embassy in Bagdad last night resulted in a Deja Vu moment all over as it appears the President is ‘missing in action AGAIN!

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President Obama Orchestrates Worst Trade in History of Trades

Washington, D.C. – (satireworld.com) Most people consider the Boston Red Sox trade of future baseball god Babe Ruth for a cash loan to finance the No, No, Nanette musical to be the worst trade of all time. But No, No, Nanette, we have a new winner.

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MSNBC Television Debuts New Reality TV Show ….. ‘The Real Housewives of Islamabad’

Islamisbad, Pakistan -(aatireworld.com) In order to shore up faltering ratings and falling revenues, cable news channel MSNBC has decided to offer prime-time reality shows with a foreign flare. Reality TV’s latest offering is sure to raise eyebrows and a few Muslim tempers as season one of The Real Housewives of Islamabad makes its way to […]

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Who Is Really the Domestic Terrorist? A Satireworld Editorial

A SATIRE WORLD EDITORIAL So… the Honorable Ex-Senate Majority Leader from Nevada (Mr. Harry Reid) believes that all of the people who once showed up to protest the treatment of the rancher in his home state are “Domestic Terrorists.” Does he also believe that the people who showed up to support Trayvon Martin were also […]

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NATO Jet Shoots Down Prophet Mohammed In Ten Minute Dog Fight

Kabul, Afghanistan NATO forces confirmed today that a Royal Air Force F-16 shot down the Prophet Mohammed crossing over into Afghanistan air space after ignoring requests that he turn around and head back to Pakistan.

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Radiation experts confirm radioactive polonium found on Arafat clothing

Geneva, Switzerland – (SatireWorld.com) Swiss radiation experts have confirmed they found traces of polonium on clothing used by Yasser Arafat which “support the possibility” the veteran Palestinian leader was poisoned.

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At least one terrorist plot in UK broken up when bombers cornered in pub breaking wind after Ramadan fast!

London (UK) – (SatireWorld.com) Scotland Yard announced the round up of at least 12 suicide bombers celebrating the end of the fast of Ramadan after they lost track of the date and began gorging in a local chip shop.

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CBS Reports: 911 Mastermind Kalhid Sheik Mohammed Reportedly Makes Homemade Candies While In US Prison

New York, NY – (SatireWorld.com) CBS News is reporting that the 911 mastermind, Kahlid Sheik Mohammed was allowed to build his own vacuum cleaner and make homemade candies while wasting away in a prison cell. According to a recent transcript of ther interview, we feel that the candy making might not go over big if […]

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Obama Admin Considering Resettling Syrian Civil War Refugees in U.S.

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com) The Obama administration is considering resettling some refugees who have escaped war-torn Syria in the United States, a development first reported by the Los Angeles Times on Sunday and later confirmed by the State Department.

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