by Sir Percival Pissgums on 29/09/11 at 6:57 amLondon, England – (SatireWorld.com)
Scores of drunken and mainly over-the-hill Englishmen launched an unprovoked attack against SatireWorld early this morning. Casualties were reported to be heavy on the English side as patriotic SW defenders threw projectiles made from ‘Dorky Books’ back in defense of their territory. When asked to explain what that particular book was, a defender said, “Well, it’s just another self-published ‘dorky book. What can I say.”‘
Dressed in the latest of English men’s wear which consisted mainly of a women’s black abaya, sandals, crotchless pantalloons, and a copy of the Parliment approved Koran (English version) for guidance, human waves of attackers swarmed the SatireWorld gates shouting from beer swilled throats …’Holy Allah Mark is Great and so are we!’ They were promptly hit with a barrage of ‘Dorky Review’ books aimed by skilled marksmen posted on nearby hilltops before they could chant ‘we give up.’ They were last seen as they ran for cover to the nearby Dunkirk water reservoir.
Opposing force leader, General Churchmouse, vowed to return, this time with with their women, who many claim have more balls then their Englishmen husbands. In fact, a recent survey performed by Hot Stud Magazine, English women preferred the bunga-bunga with American chaps over their intoxicated, dorky-reading spouses.
Though defeated,the ragtag army headed home, stopping at a local pub where the resident pub monkey danced around on tables while wearing his trade-mark pork pie hat begging for quarters and scraps of stiltson cheeze…But as they say, it wasn’t in a gay way!
Reports of mass banning in Lancaster were reported as an angry and confused Spoof editor searched his government mandated Politically Correct & Diversity Manual for an aporopriate way of saying ‘slag off’ with out hurting anyone’s feelings.
In lieu of a rasping defeat, General Churchmouse, and Her Majesty’s grenadier and resident Muchkin Ollie Peter, placed phone calls to ex-Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher looking for help in defeating their newly found adversary. Thatcher replied that Britain’s last two ships were in dry dock having their sails mended, and would be of little help in offering a quick victory.
Fortunetely, General Churchmouse had an ample supply of French white flags,several cases of cheap Hungarian wines, and a few copies of slightly damaged Dorking Review’s to sooth ruffled feathers and to allow ample back slapping.