Breaking News for February 28, 2015

by on 27/02/15 at 7:20 pm

Secret Service agents were on alert after this threatyening topilet paper roll was discovered in a White House public bathroom

Secret Service agents were on high Defcon-4 alert after this threatening toilet paper roll was discovered in a White House public bathroom

Washington DC: (

The following political news items, rumors, gossip and innuendo has been gathered by high placed sources within the Obama administration, “undercover” Congressional sources and bars around the city.

  • Prospective 2016 Democratic Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton indicated she might not run after all. It seems that she attended a White House luncheon with President Obama and came down with a case of the “runs” and the press blew the story all out of proportion. President Obama denied responsibility for the incident, blaming the White House culinary staff for serving Algerian food.
  • President Obama has asked the media, bloggers, movie services/renters and on-line news services using ObamaNet to not incite Muslims by broadcasting any anti-Islamic material or using the term Islamic terrorism. Otherwise the president will be forced to write an Executive Order abolishing the 1st amendment to the US Constitution.
  • President Obama once again tried to put his sticky hands into American middle class taxpayer’s pockets via a $60 billion unnecessary community college giveaway program to freeloaders. The president’s scam was to feign taxing the rich’s stock transactions to pay for this program. He overlooked the effect on middle class retirees who have invested in the stock market.
  • President Obama’s current Executive Amnesty for illegal immigrants has been put on hold by a federal judge’s injunction, pending an appeals court hearing. But Obama’s left wing lawyer minions are working on Plan B, also by Executive Order. Plan B would have all two million civilian federal workers adopt six illegal immigrants, thus problem solved.
  • Attorney General (AG) Eric Holder (before leaving office) and the Department of Justice Lawyers will be suing the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP), Al Sharpton’s National Action Network (NAN) and the New Black Panther Party etal for racial discrimination in accordance with not employing left wing liberal politically correct speech. These organizations have been using words like: Cracker, Whitey, White Bread, Honky, and White Boy.
  • Anti-Wall Street Senator Elizabeth Warren (D-MA) is donating her entire $8.7 million stock portfolio to the Michelle Obama Home for Unwed Mothers, located in Chicago IL. The Senator was very embarrassed by revelations of her dealings with large corporations that she despises.
  • A certain MSNBC news show host, whose leg tingles when President Obama’s name is mentioned, got his underwear in a knot when Department of State Assistant Spokeswomen Marie Harf said “Jobs for Jihadists” was the means of destroying ISIS.
  • France and the UK have agreed on sanctions to eliminate ISIS and Islamic terrorism/fanaticism whether the nuclear talks with Iran succeed or fail. France would employ a small nuclear device on Iran’s rulers, while the UK would employ a small nuclear device on Saudi Arabia’s rulers. President Obama has been kept in the dark, as usual.
  • The Organization of Islamic Countries (OIC) wants the UN to pass an international law that Islam cannot be defamed or harmed. However, Christians, Jews, Hindus, Buddhists, Shintoists and Atheists, etal can still be abused or killed by Muslims.

More political news as we get it!

3 Responses to “Breaking News for February 28, 2015”

  1. Bargis

    Feb 27th, 2015

    nice…I feel so much better now

  2. Philbert of Macadamia

    Feb 27th, 2015

    The USPS has asked Congress for funding for 10,000 new employees in 2016, when “Snail Mail” becomes faster than email on the newly regulated ObamaNet!

  3. Captain america

    Feb 28th, 2015

    ….recent executive order making Obama-Net settled science insures that “Dorks will be left in charge oif The” after being
    ‘temporarilly left in charge after abandoned by the former editor”

    Dorks confirmed editorial policy of no bacorn stories,and absolutely NO BIG ARSE jokes about FLOAT-US….

    Staff confirmed they’d be hosting the annual Manchester United

    Wanking initialtion party with David Becham calling out strokes
    for the race dhas been confirmed….

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