East Coast earthquake aftershocks rattle CIA HQ
by HMS Pantiliner on 23/08/11 at 5:21 pm
According to CIA agents, the epicenter of the DC quake appeared to be the Queen's Bedroom in the White House. "We found a large crack in the floor and several odd-looking plastic devices." Hillary Clinton issued a statement saying, "Not ours! We cleaned that room real good before we left...Well, Maybe I guess Bill did."
The ubiquitous ‘Did the earth move for you, darlin’?’ took on a new and unexpected meaning shortly after 1.52pm EDT today.
A 5.9 tremor epicentered on the White House Queen’s Bedroom was felt as far away as Langley, Virginia where hung-over spooks are still ogling Anna Chapman blue movies.
According to the White House website the palatial bedroom suite is said ‘to be sometimes used by presidents to reward friends and political supporters’ - although quite what that entails is best left to the imagination.
Until surreptitious CIA bugging of the stunning 18th century four poster bed – adapted with still rings, high bar and an all-purpose pommel whorse – which has now yielded extraordinary results.
“Sure as hell someone was bein’ rewarded up there last night,” one Langley wire-man commented today, “someone with a massive piledriver between their legs!”
The ID of the seismograph busting athlete and his/her companion is unknown although even money says it’s the Obama’s poolboy…
Let’s Hear It!