by Bargis Tryhol on 22/10/11 at 5:46 amManchester, VT – (SatireWorld.com)
The famous and often outrageous leftist ice cream manufacturer Ben & Jerrys has fallen out of step with the appetite America has for ice cream by fooling around with its number one dessert!
Ben and Jerrys, once a mainstay of leftist hippy entrepenurial efforts, is nowed owned by liberal consumer products giant Unilever who also make soap and household cleaners, and donated heavily to Barack Obama’s 2008 campaign. A company spokesman defended the controversial new product, saying it was wholesome, tasty, and a product of extensive marketing research. Others say the name ‘Schweddy Balls’ is disgusting and have boycotted stores that carry that flavor.
In the past, the Unilever marketing department has been savvy about trends and commercialism in America with ice cream flavor offerings like ‘Hubby-Hubby’ which was marketed to cater to same-sex unions couples, ‘Chunky Monkey’ which was introduced around the same time people started to notice the size of the rearend on Michelle Obama, and now ‘Schweddy Balls’ which is marketed toward the transgender crowd in order to remind them of what they don’t have.
The company has refused to back down on the heels of a full nationwide boycott, and has come out and offered another new controversial Ben & Jerry’s ice cream flavor….’Fudge Packers Delight’ which is aimed at pleasing the homosexual element in the US where health trends among the gay crowd have lowered ice cream consumption in recent years.
Unilever says it has other flavors soon to hit the market that it feels will cater toward the homosexual buyer with such flavors as …’Mister Bendover’ and ‘Phill McCrackin’, plus a Star Wars themed carton with the unusual flavor ‘In Search of Uranus.’