by captain america on 07/11/11 at 10:58 am
Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com)
Psychologists are having a field day as reports of Obama ‘going mental’ after the spectacular rise of Herman Cain threatens his re election fantasy and which is now being traced to his mixed genes being in conflict!
Insiders have reported that Obama refers to Cain in private talks with his African American Advisors as that “Uppity N******, a word allowed in the Black World when addressing each other in derogatory terms, and when meeting with America’s real First Black President, Bill Clinton, to discuss entitlement programs, redistricting, home loans to the jobless, and cell phones, rental cars, and unlimited health care to the indigenous, or as they call them in Britain, the ‘job shy.’
Cain’s mother worked as a domestic, while his father worked three jobs in order to finally buy a house and manage to send his two sons to college. Herman attended and graduated from Morehouse College with a BS in Mathematics, before going on to earn his Masters at Purdue in Computer Science.
While at Purdue he was employed by the US Navy as a ballistics expert due to his expertise in mathematics and computers and the fact he knew which end of a missile was ‘up’, something Obama has yet to grasp.
Obama, during a murky child hood, had as a father a serial womanizer who was never gainfully employed and wound up dead after a drunken car crash. Despite his fictional book “Dreams of my Father” with ghost writer and University of Chicago anarchist Bill Ayers which should have been entitled “My Father-My Night Mare-My Free Ticket to Ride,’ Obama continues to live a life of fantasy, entitlement and hubris.
Like his father, Barack had a youth filled with entitlements, managing to mysteriously get into high tuition colleges such as Occidental, Columbia, and ultimately Harvard, although no one remembers seeing or hearing of him at the time.
Cain, on the other hand achieved success wherever he went as he was the ‘go to’ guy at Coca Cola and Pillsbury, where he was credited with turning several business challenges around, first at 400 struggling Burger Kings in Philadelphia, and later at God Father’s Pizza.
Cain also served on the Board of Directors, rising to Chairman, of the Federal Reserve in Kansas City, and later as the head of the National Restaurant Association for several years. Thanks to his hands on experience, Cain knows banking, finance, job creation, labor relations, basic math and how to get things done, unlike Obama who basically knows S**** after living in a cocoon of government sponsored programs to perpetuate the welfare system dooming all who embrace it as a way of life.
Cain’s basic math skills came to the fore when he challenged Clinton on Hillary’s earlier health care package when he asked the President what he should tell employees when he’d have to lay them off due to the excessive costs. When Clinton told him ‘the government’ would have ‘assistance’ for small business owners and now unemployed workers, Cain responded, “ that’s not how the system works!”
Cain is credited with helping to derail the Clinton’s health care bill at the time after this famous exchange became public.
Cain credits his mother for instilling in him a solid work ethic and not to settle for mediocrity. Obama credits his white mother and grandmother for perpetuating racial stereotypes of blacks.
Cain admires his father for working hard to provide for his family and sending his sons to college. Obama admires his father for his socialist beliefs, his predatory womanizing and for teaching him how to scam the system and prey on American’s guilt trip for slavery. Despite decades of ‘reparations’ African Americans, preyed on by their own leaders, have yet to rise from the ashes of dozens of American Ghettos so bad even Obama refuses to either visit or acknowledge them except when it comes time to vote.
Even though Cain is a long time member of a liberal leaning Baptist Congregation in Georgia, he made up his mind a long time ago he wasn’t going to be trapped in the Democrat mind set that welfare provided by the Democrats was a life line, but in reality a sinking raft.
Obama, on the other hand sat for 20 years listening to and being guided by the racist Reverend Wright in Chicago as he bashed the Jews and America…no clearer insight was ever signaled as when Michelle Obama pronounced that ‘for the first time in my life I’m proud to be an American’ after Barack won the Presidency, despite mysteriously earning over $350,000 in a new job designed just for her in the Chicago health system.
What’s really driving Obama and his handlers wild, is that Cain’s popularity is forging momentum in the Republican Party, which has always been labeled RACIST by the Democrats who took the black and Hispanic vote for granted.
According to reports circulating around the White House Obama has taken to stalking the halls late at night talking to himself saying, “WTF is going on, I’m supposed to be the Head N***** here!”
Meanwhile, Herman is staying above the fray, sticking to straight talking about the economy, common sense, and being Politically Incorrect.
Now that would be refreshing, a Politician who was Politically Incorrect and telling it like it is to get America back on track…and that’s not about funding any more money for AMTRACK!
Even some of Obama’s staunchest media backers are starting to get snarky. Reports are circulating at Hollywood cocktail parties that libtards are suddenly calling Obama ‘inarticulate, ugly, shiftless and reverting to type surrounding himself with domineering women with big booty in major cabinet positions!’
Even Kim Kardashian is joining in the Obama bashing! “How can you respect a one term President? He was only in it for the fame and publicity. Let me tell you, I wouldn’t make a tape with him, I learned a lot from Kris, once you try half-black you won’t go back for seconds!”
Nancy Pelosi is denying rumours that she is considering a harassment suit against the President after he stuck his tongue in her ear and promised her anything if she’d just push Obama Care through the House and then reneged on the deal to make her Vice President with her own plane.
“Well,’ she said off the record, “he’s been a bit of a disappointment, but he really is a nice boy at heart!”