by Jon Worthington on 25/01/12 at 4:59 pm
The Pentagon – (SatireWorld.com)
History was re-written today when Cmdr. David Montgomery’s tell all book concerning the successful Navy SEAL Team 6 raid on the Osama Bin Laden compound last year. It seems it was lead by a former president and he’s the one that plugged Bin Laden with a carefully aimed head shot.
The raid was to be originally lead by Barack Obama, and was part of a larger plan to help revive his presidency and falling poll numbers. Pentagon officials even displayed the 1,000 lb fully armored war suit especially designed for Obama to wear while terrorist hunting with the US Navy SEALS. The $3 million dollar suit was still in it’s factory wrappings since the Commander-in-Chief complained of loose bowels on the night of the raid.
Pentagon war planners realized the short window of opportunity in raiding Bin Laden’s compound, but a quick phone call to the Crawford Ranch in Texas saved the raid when ex-president George W Bush volunteered to land with the raiding party. The only condition for Bush was he had the first shot a the terror leader.
“He was cool and composed and really let him have it, ” says Mike D. a senior SEAL team member who helped drag the dead terror leader’s body to the helicopter.
Pentagon staffers say the ‘war suit’ will be used later this year when Obama plans to visit various Occupy Wall Street protests. The manufacturer has promised to install a highly absorbent diaper device in case the Leader of the Free World has another episode of loose runs yellow belly.
Bush had only one comment when asked how he worked through all the excitement during the raid….”It was alot like going bird hunting with Cheney,” he said.