After Reading Facebook Valued At $95 Billion, Internet Inventor Al Gore Sues For Unpaid Royalties
by Jalapenoman on 07/05/12 at 4:25 pm
" you know, I invented that gull-darn internet and never got a dime! I invented intercourse too, and all I got was the dirty end of the stick."
Former United States Vice President and Internet inventor Al Gore filed a lawsuit today in Federal Court against Facebook. Gore claims that the social networking giant, which was recently valued at $95 billion, has never paid him the 2% royalty that he should be receiving.
A check of the financial records of the Tennessee Senator and would be filmmaker reveals that no one has ever paid him any royalty money for his “invention” of the internet. When asked about why he is going after Facebook now, when he has never sought any other royalty payments from any other company or individual that uses the service, Gore said:
“I was willing to let Joe the Plumber and the average American use my service for free. I know that it made their lives easier and I was happy to contribute to this in some small way. When I see, however, that a huge company like Facebook is making billions off of my invention and is running other companies out of business and attempting to take over all social networking and many sites on the internet, I just have to step in and do something!”
Gore has decided that a 2% royalty will be sufficient for the first payment. “I have deprived my children of the luxuries of life long enough. With this money, I might be able to purchase clothes that don’t come from Walmart and stop feeding them the government cheese.”
“If I had this money in my bank account back in 2000, I might have been able to buy the election like Barack Obama did in 2008. No one would have ever had to hear about hanging chads.”
He also stated that he will investigate whether or not he should pursue royalty requests from Amazon, AOL, Microsoft, E-Bay, and other internet giants.
In a related story, when President Obama heard that Facebook was valued at $95 billion dollars, he said “that’s more money than even I can waste in an hour!”
captain america
May 9th, 2012
…he’ll be after SW next for making him infamous…..
…the EPA should shut him down for all his anal
‘flapping’ (fracking) and polluting the airwaves on said internet..
BTW: did he and Revota use the same Masseuse??