by Jalapenoman on 19/07/12 at 10:40 amWashington, DC – (SatireWorld.com)
In the aftermath of Kiss-cam-Gate, Mitt Romney has volunteered to be filmed with his wife at all possible sporting events from now until the November elections.
In Monday’s exhibition basketball game in Washington, D.C. between the United States team and Brazil, the kiss-cam focused in on the President and First Lady during the first half of the game. Even though it stated on the jumbotrons in the auditorium that it was a kiss-cam, and even though the Mr. Obama moved in for the lip lock, and even though Vice President Joe Biden leaned in to encourage Michelle to kiss Barack, she wouldn’t do it.
According to two black reporters on PTI (Pardon the Interruption), an ESPN Sports News show, the President and First Lady left the game at the beginning of the second quarter and were outside in the Presidential Limo. At that point, a phone call from the White House Press Secretary had them return to the auditorium and to their seats. Then, they were pictured on the Jumbotron with a happy and successful smooch.
Michael Wilbon, one of the two reporters, said that both were at the game and both witnessed the event. He also stated that the only reason that they came back into the auditorium was because “this is an election year!”
From a campaign stop in Ohio, Mitt Romney announced that he and his wife Ann will be attending every Major League Baseball game that has a kiss-cam this summer. “We’ll even do some double-A stuff if we are campaigning in that area.” He also said that “we plan on making several exhibition games and some early season NFL stuff and even some NCAA football games. When college and pro basketball gets started again right before election time, we’ll make those stops too! Ann and I want everyone to know that she is willing to kiss me on camera without having to get a Press Secretary or Campaign Manager involved.”
When asked if he might also try to cop a feel or get in some tongue actions, Romney said that “it depends on our audience and whether or not it might get me a few more votes.”
Michelle’s snub also has experts wondering if all is well in the White House or if repeated rumors of Presidetial mischief (which are quickly squashed by the media) have finally hit home. Said Hedda Taylor of Washington Insider, “Michelle knows which side of the toast her bread is buttered on. She knows that she still has to kiss this man, even if he has kept women in local apartments since his Senate Days. She knows that if she dumps his cheating ass, there will be no more trips to Europe of lavish gifts of jewelry, clothes, or furs. She will put up with this until after the election (if her husband loses) or for four more years (if he wins). If she can manage to turn this into a Hillary Clinton type marriage, she might stay. Otherwise, I’d expect her to be bouncing the headboards with some other guy before the next election season.”