Politician Frank Doesn’t Even Win Home State In “Favorite Barney” Contest

by on 16/03/13 at 7:25 pm

It's a real shame when a gay congressman has bigger tits than Taylor Swift

It’s a real shame when it’s your gay congressman that has bigger tits than hottie Taylor Swift

Boston, MA – (SatireWorld.com)

In a contest of favorite Barneys, there were very few surprises.
Barney Fife (The Andy Griffith Show) did well among persons over fifty who had seen him when his show was on the air, law enforcement officers, and people who enjoyed watching classic television.

Barney the Dinosaur did well among children and older teens who had grown up watching the purple creature (along with his friend Baby Bop). He also did well among mothers and pre-school teachers.

Barney Rubble, the sidekick of Fred Flintstone) did well among fans of animated series and chewable vitamins and the groups that watched his show during the original 60’s airing.

Congressman Barney Frank, however, failed to carry his home state of Massachusetts. In fact, Frank only did well among Catholic altar boys and voters in San Francisco.

When a politician can’t even get five percent of the vote in his home state, it makes one wonder if he was truly elected by a majority vote.

Man on the street interviews were conducted in Boston to ask people if they were familiar with Barney Frank. Following are their responses:

“Ain’t he the guy that send girls pictures of his package?” (Actually, that was Anthony Wiener)
“Isn’t a Blarney Frank some kind of Irish Hot Dog?” (It may be, but we wouldn’t touch it)
“I think that’s the cross dresser who hangs out with Oprah” (Could be, but that’s also her boyfriend Steadman)
“With all the crap he gets away with, isn’t he some kind of Kennedy?” (Either that, or he’s sleeping with one or more…. and he looks like he could have drowned at Chappaquiddick)

The most common response overall from Boston residents was “I think he was Ted Kennedy’s boyfriend or something.”

Note to Bostonians: If a middle aged man comes up to you on Sunday the 17th (St. Patrick’s Day) and asks you to “Kiss the Barney Stones,” we’d encourage you to say “No!”

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