Al Gore, World’s Fattest Fool, Pretends UK is Tropical Paradise over Easter!

by on 01/04/13 at 5:42 am

It's one thing being a fool and not know it....Imagine knowing you're a fool and you find it an asset!

It’s one thing being a fool and not know it….Imagine knowing you’re a fool and you find it an asset!

Cambridge (UK) – (

It appears only fitting that the world’s biggest fool, Al Gore, was on hand to bask in the excitement of the annual Oxford/Cambridge race on the Thames coinciding with the first day of summer, daylight savings time, and of course April fools day.

Continuing to deny his predictions are nothing but balderdash, Dooms Day Dolt Al appeared in a lawn chair on the banks of the river in a garish Hawaiian shirt, a pair of safari shorts, and bare feet highlighted by a recent pedicure,apparently enjoying the seasonal weather,including snow flurries and a dip to -12 degrees centigrade.

“This is really an enjoyable break from the stifling weather,” said Gore appearing cool and relaxed.

While participants in the race said they were suffering from the cold causing their nut sack to retreat up their arse hole, Gore appeared not to mind the weather, calling it a ‘temporary aberration that will soon turn around ‘ saying, “I suspect by the 4th of July the weather will be stifling, and the banks of the Thames will pass the 100 year flood mark and wipe out most of London,” he said smugly, quoting from his fictional novel “Unintended Comments on Global Bull Shit’ which he was forced to self publish and advertise in outlandish Fool-Tube appearances.

Gore was surrounded by a hastily called in force of 2 Para to protect him from a horde of angry Brits who had formerly believed his prognostications, and now were left freezing their arse off holding fancy alcoholic poncey drinks with tiny umbrellas in what was supposed to be a celebration of summer, but turned into the coldest Easter in 100 years.

And just how cold was it?

It was SO COLD the weather channel dispatched the Master of Disaster Jim Cantori to Jolly Cold England to cover the freezing event, which is scheduled to continue through the week. Cantori reported from outside the hastily constructed channel’s Igloo HQ on Tothill Street, just a short molotov cocktail throw from Scotland Yard.

At the time of his report, Cantori was seen warming his hands over a impromptu barn fire fed by the Guardian Sunday Edition, and encouraged by the chair legs of a local pub salvaged after a wild
brawl from the night before.

The warmth of the fire brought with it a pride of local mice, all seen huddling by the flames in order to keep warm whilst waiting for the local chinese take aways to commence heating up their woks for business so they could return to their homes.

The only one seen nipping about was the ever present Kim Kardashian in town, coincidentally with Gore, to promote her self inflating pregnancy body bag line of clothing, and who stopped by to chat with Al.

Reporters were forced to move out of the shade of the two blimps and they continued to blot out what little warmth was achieved by a weak, and impotent sun.

More on Global Warming if we ever git it!

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