Howard Worth: Thanks to ObamaCare I quit my job at Satire World!

by on 17/07/13 at 11:55 am

Harold looks a little confused after a night celebrating the passage of gay marriage in the UK.

Harold looks a little confused after a night celebrating the passage of gay marriage in the UK.

Portsmouth (UK) – (

Former UK stringer Howard Worth is just one of the 940,000 former employed who will, or have, opted out of employment thanks to ObamaCare and the Health exchanges.

A new study predicts that almost a million currently employed are working just for health benefits, and the soon to go into effect Obama socialized Medicine scheme will free them from the odious burden of reporting for work and earning a living swelling the ranks of the ‘job shy’.

Democrats like Nancy Pelosi hailed the report saying it would now allow individuals the freedom to pursue their desires in the graffiti arts, panhandling, working as an unpaid (and unlaid) Clinton intern, volunteers to protest pro-life groups, self publish their life stories, or just to camp out on village greens
protesting the violation of their human rights to live an indolent and drug induced fantasy!

(Does an unemployed OWS participant shit in the woods…now I axe you!)

Worth, an avid supporter of trade unions and staunch anti-colonist,is eligible for Obamacare thanks to his green card which was sponsored by his former colonial mates which enabled him to briefly report on ‘football’ happenings in the US, the small business enterprises run by displaced Muslims who left the UK for a ‘better life’, and stories on the NHS where he was once made to queue for 3 days after an alcoholic incident which left him with a swollen and displaced thumb after attempting to gouge the eye out of a fellow journalist in a misplaced drunken rage.

Reached by Obama phone whilst a holiday in Italy Worth said, “….doing fine mate, just taking the piss and living the life of O’Riley thanks to the Massachusetts welfare system which is still depositing money into me debit account…America is great, innit!”

He said he expects his next book to do better. “The last one wasn’t well received in America, racist BASTARDS…wound up costing us more to produce than we got for humping it on U-tube. But, we learned…we’re just going to print more of them this time to amortize the costs…that’s capitalism,eh?”

SW editor Bargis Tryhol said healthcare for Worth was futile. “He asked for condoms in his policy, but when he got ’em he just abused the system and went around with one over his head after he gave his hat away on Boxing day….gave everyone a good laff on Halloween, THOUGH!….what a pisser!”

10 Responses to “Howard Worth: Thanks to ObamaCare I quit my job at Satire World!”

  1. Skoob

    Jul 20th, 2013


  2. captain america

    Jul 20th, 2013

    ….yes….loss of sense of humour is a terrible thing…
    Almost as bad as losing a mate due to drink…

  3. Jalapenoman

    Jul 21st, 2013

    I’m reading this story and the absolute, most ridiculous thing about it is the ad at the bottom. It is sponsored by the “Responsible Gaming Assosication of New Mexico” and is an ad for the 17th Annual Problem Gambling Conference. Sound okay so far? Sounds like maybe a good thing? The problem is that the conference is being held at the Isleta Resort and Casino (which is an Indian casino outside of Albuquerque).

    Yep, let’s hold the addicted gambler’s convention in a casino!

  4. captain america

    Jul 21st, 2013

    ….you BET!

  5. Skoob

    Jul 21st, 2013

    I have my own website now. Sole admin rights and all that. We even have a forum. Open to the public. But gentlemen – I would never stoop so low as to demean any of you fine people in public. Basically – I have more productive things to do with my time.

    Have a nice day.

    • Bargis

      Jul 21st, 2013

      3-2-1 the Forum ain’t what it used to be…Blame Skoob….Lousy writers…No talent hacks

  6. Skoob

    Jul 21st, 2013

    Ah well – carry on.

  7. Jalapenoman

    Jul 21st, 2013

    If you have more productive things to do with your time, why do you keep showing up here?

    • Bargis

      Jul 22nd, 2013

      Well Jman….It’s late over there and all the teenage boys are home in bed that’s why he shows up here.

  8. Skoob

    Jul 21st, 2013

    You don’t usually lose mates for any worthwhile reason. Under normal circumstances a friend will always stand firmly by your side. Sometimes that’s just not possible. Talk to your wife Steve. Try to get some closure because therein lies the story. I won’t bother you guys again. I think your politics suck, but then you already knew that. Generally speaking your collective conduct has been abhorrent.

    Sleep well.

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