Weiner Rebooted: Hires Pee Wee Herman as PR Rep pending explosive Divorce naming Hillary as Correspondent!
by captain america on 23/09/13 at 9:18 amWeiner-land, New York City – (SatireWorld.com)
Anthony Weiner, in danger of falling further into the hole he dug for himself, was further threatened when a NY Post story indicated wife Huma was given an ultimatum by the Clinton Cabal: “Ditch the Putz…or you’ll be kicked out of bed with the Clintons!”
Stress is showing on Weiner, as reporters caught him in a shouting match at a local kid park when Anthony almost pissed himself when a local tot peed on the park swing Weiner had his eye on. The father of the tot was running off to get some wipes to clean up after himself, a concept inconceivable to Anthony , and he began to melt down shouting at the father.
Keeping his calm the unidentified man called Weiner out for his tantrum saying, “You’re a hoot, talking about one’s self control and pissing all over yourself!”
Even after breaking a spending record of $148 per vote in the recent mayoral election, he got 5% or 31,000, Weiner reportedly still has a few mill left in his political action chest and maybe eyeing the upcoming 2014 midterms to rear his ugly head (the small one) yet once again.
Seeking redemption it’s been reported that Anthony has reached out to former TV star and movie fan Pee Wee Herman to teach him a better sense of humour to engage supporters, and also manage his reproductive organ, which seems to have a mind of it’s own showing up when not invited, and in the most public places.
Said former girl friend and political reporter Kirsten Powers who used to date him, “You’ve got to hand it to Weiner, (npi), just when you think he’s withdrawn into his shell, he pops up again!The man is a Satyr. Goes to prove, you can’t keep the dick head down!”
Wife Huma has not been seen lately near the couple’s apartment, but has been seen having intense ‘business’ conversations with Tina Brown, the ill-fated head of the recently deceased Newsweek magazine who chums say is trying to cultivate Huma in order to “get close” to Hillary pending the 2016 Presidential election.
According to insiders around the NYC political scene Anthony is considering the “nuclear’ option; if Huma files for divorce he’ll name Hillary as correspondent in the hearings and produce e-mails, nude photos, love poems, and top secret communications between his wife and the Muslim Brotherhood.
Said a friend of Vince Foster, former council and close personal friend of Hillary, “If Anthony goes that route I think he’s suicidal. If I was him, I wouldn’t be taking any more ‘walks in the park’ alone.!”
The Muslim Brotherhood, under guard in Egypt , was unavailable for comment, but Rachael Maddow speaking on Al Jazerra said “I think Weiner is a dead man walking!”