Obama Finally ‘Messes with the Marines’ Forcing Them To Wear Unisex Hats

by on 24/10/13 at 1:27 pm

The Proud.. The Few.... The Metrosexuals!

The Proud..
The Few….
The Metrosexuals!

Paris Island, SC – (SatireWorld.com)

Straight from the ‘this isn’t going to go over well section of the Poor Planning Manual’, the White House announced a change to the Marine Corps’ uniform hats could take the hard-nosed Leathernecks from the Halls of Montezuma to the shops of Fith Avenue.

Thanks to a plan by President Obama to create a “unisex” look for the Marine Corps, officials are on the verge of swapping out the Marines’ iconic caps with a new hat that some have derided as so “girly” that they would make Richard Simmons blush.

“We don’t even have enough funding to buy bullets, and the DoD is pushing to spend $8 million on covers that look like women’s hats!” one senior Marine source fumed to The Post. “The Marines deserve better. It makes them look ridiculous.”

The thin new hats have a feminine line that some officials think would make them look just as good on female marines as on males. Of course, that’s in keeping with the Obama directive, and with 9 top generals sacked in the past week for ‘not being on the Obama wagon,’ chances are the Corp will wear faggoty-style hats in the near future.

Marine corp gunnery sergeant Mike Stone, a twenty-five year veteran, said…” I hope the frickin’ cover comes with a tube of Vaseline so it won’t hurt when I shove it up Obama’s faggoty ass! First the Army pukes have to wear a beret like those French douchebags, now we have to look like a friggin San Francisco meter maid!”

Puke call in zero three hundred hours……….

2 Responses to “Obama Finally ‘Messes with the Marines’ Forcing Them To Wear Unisex Hats”

  1. captain america

    Oct 24th, 2013

    …I’ll jist git me hat on the way to the bidet!

  2. Philbert of Macadamia

    Oct 24th, 2013

    The first lady told him to do it or…………..?

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