Feds Open No-Kill Shelter for Immigrants on Texas/Mexico Border

by on 27/06/14 at 6:37 am

Tom and Belinda Applegate stopped by after work at the drive-thru, adopted two girls from Belize, and picked up a bucket of wings, a few biscuits, and some slaw.

Tom and Belinda Applegate stopped by at the Immi-Mart drive-thru after church and adopted two cute girls from Belize, and then picked up a bucket of hot wings, a few biscuits, and some creamy cole slaw.

Laredo, TX – (satireworld.com)

The federal government has opened a new no-kill shelter in this border town to help find homes for thousands of new illegal immigrants who continue flooding into the country.

In the past, if an illegal alien sneaked across our border and was captured by the US Border Patrol, they were either tagged and released or held for three days before being euthanized if a suitable home could not be found for them.

Now, thanks to political correctness run amok, people who are captured crossing the border will be given free food, shelter, and healthcare for an indefinite period of time.

The shelter will run on donations as much as possible and funding will be backed up by stealing taxes from citizens who don’t agree with the policy. These citizens will also be told to “shove it” and to “keep their mouths shut about the issue.”

Proponents of the facility are willing to donate to the new shelter but don’t want any of the “shelter humans” living in their own neighborhoods.

Critics of the shelter, most of whom want the immigrants to be shipped back to their country of origin, are being cast as cruel, mean, racist, and insensitive.

Critics maintain that if the illegal aliens want to go through the normal naturalization process to become a citizen then that is fine but, otherwise, the country does not have the money to support countless new people with little education and few skills.

Starting next week, adoption days will be held on weekends outside many Immi(grant)-Mart stores, which are old Wal-Mart and PetSmart stores the feds have taken over and insisted be used for just this purpose.

Immi-Marts will be stocked with a variety of items that the average illegal might need or want. But it’s OK…you’re paying for it.

Please. Won’t you help an illegal alien find their forever home today?

5 Responses to “Feds Open No-Kill Shelter for Immigrants on Texas/Mexico Border”

  1. captain america

    Jun 27th, 2014


    ….and with the child credit available from Obama, an adoption
    should pay handsomely too!!

    It’s a win,win for everybody. As the new Michelle ad claims:
    It Pays to Adopt!

  2. E. Williams

    Jun 27th, 2014

    Bargis, it warms my nether-regions to see that pic of the happy family who have given two little lawbreakers their forever home!

    Cap, you know Mooch is going to want to adopt some of these young knuckleheads for her own!

    • Bargis

      Jun 27th, 2014

      Evil…..I heard they’re giving these kids treasure maps before they do the crossing with important data included….How to file for Social Secutrity and Obamacare. How to get a Pell grant. How to get a free car. Where to get laid free. Where to find taco-flavored toothpaste, and those hard-to-find extra small condoms.

      Of course, it includes how to say ‘me no comprende’ to everyone even other latinos….and of course, a wallet-sized photo of Barry O-B visiting South of the Border in So Carolina. In the photo he’s standing next to a taco stand eating a burrito with a sombrero on his head next to a goat with a sombrero on its head.

  3. captain america

    Jun 27th, 2014

    now she wants to be Angela Jolee??

    • Bargis

      Jun 27th, 2014

      Speaking of Angelina….Did you know Brad said she has ‘user instructions’ tattooed on her ass? Probably in braille too!

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