(satireworld.com) Walter Bucket Presents: TRUE FACTS……..according to Nopes! #25

by on 14/08/14 at 3:16 pm

The Late Mohammed Abudada's Kabul Recycling Center had some problems with its latest recycling venture when TV ads caused a ruckus.

The Late Mohammed Abudada’s Kabul Recycling Center had some problems with its latest recycling venture when TV ads caused a ruckus.

(satireworld.com) Walter Bucket Presents: TRUE FACTS

1. “World’s Funniest New Freaks” will not be on TV after all because of the threat of lawsuits. The premise was to catch women who had fallen asleep on the beach and the sun had rearranged their plastic surgery.

2. The late James Arness played Matt Dillon on TV for over 21 years and called everyone he met Festus after he retired.

3. Eskimos also have 20 different words for “Fell on snow and busted ass!”, but none are printable here..yes, even here.

4. Robert E. Lee, the great Confederate leader of the War Between the States, once outwitted his Union counterparts by firing 300 of his troops from cannons to land behind enemy lines!

5. A secret escalator has been discovered on the Great Pyramid in Egypt.

6. Playwright Tennessee Williams swore that William Shakespeare appeared near his bed one night and told him a great idea for a play, but that he, Williams, was laughing so hard at Shakespeare’s outfit that he couldn’t pay attention.

7. In 2011, “The Wild Man of Borneo” changed his name to “The Wild Man of Indonesia!”

8. A rodents teeth and Mick Jaggers mouth will never stop growing.

9. On a 1958 TV Baseball Game of the Week, a drunk Dizzy Dean had to be helped from the broadcast booth after singing “The Wabash Cannonball” and farting for the train whistle.

10. No two sets of Siamese Twins are the same.

-Walter Bucket

7 Responses to “(satireworld.com) Walter Bucket Presents: TRUE FACTS……..according to Nopes! #25”

  1. Captain america

    Aug 14th, 2014

    ,,,Mel Allen used to (he’s dead) both belch and fart while drinking Ballentine on air where he announced NY Yankee games
    and later on when he went to the Stork Club and groped bimbos with Mantle, Ford and Billy Martin….he wan’t into ESPN political correctness and never got banned…not even for 30 minutes!

  2. Walter Bucket

    Aug 15th, 2014

    When we lost all these great characters like Dizzy, Yogi, Martin, Bill Veeck and his midget, Jimmy Piersall, Hoyt Wilhelm pitching both games of a double-hitter etc, baseball just isn’t much fun anymore.

    • Captain america

      Aug 15th, 2014

      ….When your Little League shortstop is named Lucille, and your catcher is named. Chamone . you know it’s time to switch sports!

      Played some type fo organized ball till I was 49…always a great time and something to look forward to since the Giants and the Polo Grounds were moved out west to SF (WTF!)

      Still I have my 1951 giants program….Sa (the Barber) l Maglie dusting off Carl Furillo…..Priceless….Don Mueller driving in a run on an intentional walk when he reached out for the pitch…awesome..
      $10,000 contract meant you were rich and a tattoo meant you were in jail in Rikers….The Boys of Summer all gone and replaced with
      mercenaries in order to keep up with the Kardashians….no such thing as amateur sports these days…as Dion Sanders said when he turned down his first pro contract:”sheeeet, Man…I made more in college at FSU!
      Can you see remember reading and listening to Red Barbour?

      • Bargis

        Aug 15th, 2014

        Remember Braves Pitcher Lou Dorsett? (World Series 1958 I think no-hitter) He was my next door neighbor up until he passed about 8-9 years ago. The stories I heard from him about the greatest players of the 1950s could fill a book, and I mean stuff no one knows about.

        • Walter Bucket

          Aug 15th, 2014

          I think that would be great living next door to star pitcher. I rooted for Braves in Series against Yanks. Didn’t Lou Burdette or Warren Sphan win 3 games in one series?

      • Walter Bucket

        Aug 15th, 2014

        Yes I remember Red Barbour. I was a White Sox fan and listened to Bob Elson, Don Wells.

        If a White Sox player hit a homer, the (first?) scoreboard would explode and announcer would say, “A White Owl Wallop and a box of White Owl Cigars!”

        I can remember entire line-up of Sox who were in World Series in 1959 and had few home runs. They won American League on pitching, singles, defense and stolen bases. They got 11 runs in one inning on one single by Nellie Fox. I listened to it and there must have been 4 or 5 errors, stolen bases and about 6-7 walks.

  3. Captain america

    Aug 15th, 2014

    ….can you guys remember the smell of that Spaulding ball when you opened the box and the smell of your first glove?

    (Lowton remembers the smell of his first unisex bike seat!)

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