AG Holder Orders Another Mike Brown Autopsy: “We’ll Do This Thing Until We Get the Results We Want!”

by on 18/08/14 at 5:54 pm

ActualBrown autopsy photo shows just how angry the store clerk was with the strong arm robbery.

Actual Mike Brown autopsy photo shows just how angry and yet resourceful the store clerk was during the strong arm robbery.

Washington D. C. – (satireworld.com)

Activist Attorney General, Eric Holder, isn’t satisfied with initial autopsy results on Mike Brown, the Ferguson shooting victim, so he has decided to order that a second procedure be performed.

“Until results reveal that Mr. Brown was a ‘Gentle Giant’ who was innocently gunned down in broad daylight, we will continue to have autopsy after autopsy.” Mr. Holder said. “We have a narrative here and we need the results to gel with the story we’re sticking with.”

Holder went on to say if the second autopsy didn’t satisfy their questions about what happened, they would continue to gut Mr. Brown’s body like a fish and dishonor him however many times it took to prove their point.

“Mike would want it that way,” Holder said. “My buddies Sharpton and Jesse J said it was fine to exploit his body, name and memory any way necessary to forward the cause and make those white cracka cops pay.”

A new push for gun control will be the next step the contemptible AG will be using the tragedy for. Holder hinted they may need to parade Brown’s body, impaled on a stake, through the middle of town to push the agenda as far as they needed to create enough outrage to affect change.

Holder has already hinted that, if the toxicology report comes back showing any trace of drugs in Mr. Brown’s body at the time of the shooting, he would be submitting the report back to lab officials until they get the results right.

The AG said he plans on visiting Ferguson in the near future to talk with the locals, visit his lawyers and law enforcement personnel there, stir up the hornet’s nest, and do a little looting.



3 Responses to “AG Holder Orders Another Mike Brown Autopsy: “We’ll Do This Thing Until We Get the Results We Want!””

  1. Jalapenoman

    Aug 18th, 2014

    I wonder if they will find any Skittles in his stomach?

  2. E. Williams

    Aug 19th, 2014

    Evidently, he was a member of the Choom Gang…

  3. Captain america

    Aug 19th, 2014

    …..by the time Holder finished probing the 6-8 wounds he concluded that the victim had been shoot in the back at close range by a Barrett .50 cal using armour piercing shells…”what else could have made those large wounds,” he said addressing The New Black Panthers along with Al Sharpton WHO CLAIMED “RACISIM IS TURNING OUR INNOCENT BLACK CHILDREN INTO SWISS CHEESE!”

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