(satireworld.com) Walter Bucket Presents: TRUE FACTS……..according to Nopes! #41

by on 11/09/14 at 8:43 am

A Manchester man was so drunk from drinking beer for over four hours, he didn't realize his friends super-glued his ass to the bar stool as a joke until he had to get up and take a piss

A Manchester man was so drunk from drinking beer for over four hours, he didn’t realize his friends super-glued his ass to the bar stool as a joke until he had to get up and take a piss

(satireworld.com) Walter Bucket Presents: TRUE FACTS

1. The Goldfish Swallowing fad began at Harvard U. in 1938 and only stopped when most states made it illegal after a student at Arkansas State choked to death on a Koi.

2. The Top 5 in having the biggest vocabulary: 1. Journalists 2. Clergy 3. Lawyers 4. Vanna White 5. Doctors.

3. The Average American sees or hears approximately 600 commercials a day, according to the fine people at ADCO! “When you want it done, we’re the one!”

4. A Bighorn Sheep can ram his head forward hard enough to slightly jar a D.C. politician.

5. The latest thing at Greenpeace is that members have sworn to be buried in a recyclable coffin after having a peach, mango or apricot seed shoved up their ass just before they die.

6. A person’s nose and ears grow all your life. Many legends tell of the appearance of Methuselah to that of an elephant.

7. Some deer in China are so small that, during hunting season, you are only allowed to use a slingshot.

8. The world’s biggest pyramid in Mexico was built between 5 and 12 A.D. (E.S.T.)

9. A person breathes 7 quarts of air every minute, even more when making anonymous telephone calls at night.

10. The 50-year mystery of the exact words to “Louie, Louie” will be solved sometimes next year as the legal rights have been bought by Bob Dylan.

11. A study by a Tennessee Think Tank has observed that over 75% of today’s shit floats, while only 60 years ago, 75% went straight to the bottom of the bowl. “No shit! We must consume more fiber!”, stated spokesman.

12. The famous “Boxer Rebellion” in China pretty well put an end to dog fights.

-Walter Bucket



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