by E. Williams on 21/12/14 at 7:18 pm
TEXAS CITY, TX – (satireworld.com)
The owner of Mark-1 Plumbing was surprised when he was alerted to a picture on Twitter showing Islamic Jihadists using one of his old trucks to wage warfare on its opponents in the Middle East. Mark Oberholtzer said he didn’t understand how his old truck ended up in Syria or why it had a anti-aircraft gun mounted in the bed of the truck.
“I thought the car dealership was going to take off the anti-aircraft gun after I traded it in years ago,” Oberholtzer said. “It was a great marketing tool for us but we never used it. It was either a great conversation starter or it scared the shit out of you and you called us for service, because you were afraid if you didn’t we might come by your house late some night and give you an awakening you’d never forget.”
“What is the deal with those fighters using it anyway? Is ISIS some sort of desert plumber’s union, or do they need that kind of firepower to unclog some of the drains in that part of the world? Craziest thing I ever saw.”
Oberholtzer wants to reassure his customers he has never been involved with any kind of terrorist group and is just a good ‘ol Texas boy. “I’ll be honest though, there have been some jobs I’ve gone out on where a grenade or two would have solved the problem a lot quicker and saved the homeowner a lot of time and money!”
In related news, ISIS is considering a name change to IPIS, Islamic Plumbers in Syria.