North Korea’s Internet Down, Country’s Lone Dial-Up Modem Offline

by on 23/12/14 at 6:40 pm

China News reported 1,500 dead switch board operators sinc e the blackout knocked Kim Song-Un's favorite Swedish porn site off line.

China News reported 1,500 dead switch board operators since the blackout knocked Kim Song-Un’s favorite Swedish porn site off line.

PYONGYANG – (satireworld.com)

North Korea has plunged into a state of emergency tonight as the country’s only dial-up modem is acting up, disrupting all technology and communications in the little communist country. A few pagers were working sporadically, allowing small pockets of communication to take place.

For the most part, the country sits in darkness tonight, just like every night, but without their usual reruns of Sanford and Son, the ability to play Atari’s video game Pong on their TV sets, and forced to sit and talk with family members and friends about how much their country sucks.

For the country’s elite, most of their brick-sized cell phones are inoperable. Many are grumbling in private they wish they could reboot the entire government.

Sony Pictures is contemplating quickly releasing “The Interview” for a short, limited release in theaters and then, when North Korea is back online, denying that it ever happened.



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