Hillary denies she bused in “Wal Martians ” for Iowa photo ops!

by on 19/04/15 at 6:57 pm

Hillary's letting it all hang out in her 'new look' that's sure to be a trendsetter

Hillary’s letting it all hang out in her ‘new look’ that’s sure to be a trendsetter

Benton, AR – (satireworld.com)

According to “after action” reports Hillary left Iowa earlier than planned after attempts to show the former First Lady as ‘a regular old grandma” went horribly wrong leading to since scrubbed footage of Hillary deluged with Wal Mart shoppers previously seen world wide on U-Tube videos poking fun at outrageously dressed, grossly over weight, and cross dressing toothless zombies stalking the aisles of the discount stores!

In an effort to appease the Diva, Wal Mart announced it was closing 1100 stores and furloughing 12900 workers in an attempt to discourage any more ridicule for the presumptive democratic Presidential candidate and odds on favorite to become the first overweight 69 year old Feminist gay white female commander-in-chief!

Officials denied that the closings were in retaliation for employees picketing for a minimum wage of $32 an hour and in support of reluctant candidate Elizabeth Warren who has been behind calls for shelf stackers and greeters at fast foot outlets to be ‘paid like tenured professors at Harvard who only teach one class a week on “Feminist Hygiene” featuring Vagina Vacuuming sponsored by Dyson.

Wal Mart claimed unprecedented “plumbing problems” for the closings after their stores were deluged with “Wal Martians” camping in their lots over night in order to be first in line for the ‘facilities’ when the stores opened in the morning where Hillary was handing out first come first served signed pictures of her changing grand daughter Charlotte’s poopy diapers!

#Ready for Hillary campaigners are said to be keeping a low profile until Hillary finishes venting over the debacle of her ‘roll out’ campaign but insist ‘we’ll be back’ after they refuel the campaign vans and get set to roll into Ferguson, Missouri with new banners proclaiming “Black Votes Matter!”

SW Investigative Reporter Evil Williams said “I’ll be there for the Weather Chanel like Jim Cantori covering this next ‘unnatural campaign disaster’ at great personal risk due to the giant “S***t Storm” as Hurricane Huma threatens to curtail Hillary’s march to the White House!”

3 Responses to “Hillary denies she bused in “Wal Martians ” for Iowa photo ops!”

  1. E. Williams

    Apr 19th, 2015

    Paying my dues sucks! But I’ll take another one for the team. These people give me the creeps!

  2. Captain america

    Apr 19th, 2015

    …yeah…but payback is sweet!

    I may have you next as a wet nurse for Charlotte a nd a sex surrogate for

    Mind the underbite!

  3. E. Williams

    Apr 19th, 2015

    Don’t put me in with Donkey from Shrek!

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