by E. Williams on 21/09/15 at 1:03 pm
WASHINGTON – (satireworld.com)
After a teenage Muslim boy in Texas was arrested for bringing what appeared to be a briefcase bomb to his school, President Obama said it was imperative that America embrace these young, inventive minds and he invited the young man to the White House. The teen claimed the device was a clock but, to any normal person, the ticking briefcase with wires coming out of it looked like a homemade bomb.
Not one to take political correctness only halfway, President Obama has extended invitations to all young Muslims who invent ordinary household items that could be mistaken for a bomb. Saying that doing otherwise might hurt young Muslim’s feelings, Mr. Obama said there seemed to be little downside to his offer.
“We need to coddle these bright young minds, not punish them,” Obama said. “I realize that by embracing their inventive spirit some of these young men may grow up to develop and build devices that bring great advances to our society, while others might bring death and destruction to our own country, but it would be after I’m out of office and we want to encourage them either way.”
The President continued, “So all you Muslim young men who can come up with any kind of device that ticks, smokes, buzzes, hisses, or emits a smell that might fool your teacher into thinking a toxic gas may be about to be released, send us your creations. If you can succeed in getting arrested, well, you just punched your ticket for a free, taxpayer-funded trip to the White House!”
Mr. Obama then told members of the press, “Remember, if you see something, say something. Unless the person with the suspicious something looks Muslim. Death resulting from acting too late is bad, but racial profiling is much, much worse.”
When reporters pointed out to the President that inviting young Muslim inventors to the White House while not inviting inventors of other ethnic groups looked like he was playing favorites, Mr. Obama smiled and said, “I always do!”