by E. Williams on 25/09/15 at 5:58 am
WASHINGTON D.C. – (satireworld.com)
It was a confusing and awkward meeting today when two of the most famous men on the planet, one held in high regard by Catholics and the other worshiped by Democrats, held a joint press conference that was at best uneven, highlighted by starts and stops.
According to sources, President Obama kept thinking questions directed to ‘His Holiness’ were directed at him. Each time the Pope would begin to answer a question, Mr. Obama would interrupt by starting to give his own answer. Both men would then look at each other and Obama would realize what happened, smile, and pause to let the Pope answer.
Finally, for the sake of streamlining things, reporters got the President to agree that whenever they had a question for him, they would address him as ‘God,’ like they always do, and the Pope would remain called by ‘His Holiness.’
The two men talked for a bit after the press conference, at which time Mr. Obama assured the Pope that he (Obama) alone had the power to stop global warming, but that doing so would negate the untold billions he and other countries could raise from taxpayers through expensive regulations that would benefit their governments.
Obama then leaned in to the Pope and told him that he had already lowered the level of the world’s oceans by six inches, not enough that researchers would detect a difference, but to prove he could do it if he wanted to. Mr. Obama then thanked the Pope for allowing himself to be used as a useful idiot for the cause of climate change.
When the Pope asked ‘His Holiness’ about abortion, Mr. Obama quickly changed the subject by showing the Pope the beautiful landscaping in the Rose Garden and telling the Pope, “Come in, let me introduce you to the gay nuns and transgendered people I invited to meet you today.”