Monica Lewinsky Mulls $50,000 Fee To Inaugurate London’s Fellatio Cafe

by on 04/08/16 at 4:02 pm

Yes, it's little known that Monica won an award and accepted it wearing...You guessed it...Her famous Blue Gap Dress!

Yes, it’s little known that Monica won an award and accepted it wearing…You guessed it…Her famous Blue Gap Dress!

"Attention! Attention! Blow job needed at table 12! Hum job needed on table 34"

“Attention! Attention!
Blow job needed at table 12!
Hum job needed on table 34″

Gary and Barry want to work there for no pay!

Gary and Barry want to work there for no pay!


London, UK, The Seat of Empire – (SatireWorld.com)

Offering a ‘free’ blowjob with each mouthwateringly priced $100 cappuccino a new oral sex-themed restaurant in London is hoping to lure former Clinton intern Monica Lewinsky to do the honors at its official opening next month.

“Old slag Monica would be our number one prick – uh, pick!” cafe proprietor Dave Pimpe told Satireworld reporters, “on account of being famous for her taste in men.”

Allegedly strapped for cash since the collapse of her eponymous snakeskint handbag business La Lewinsky, 69, may be tempted by the $50K fee to inaugurate the cafe-cum-cigar lounge in one of London’s seediest red light quarters.

Advance publicity for the Paddington Fellatio Cafe describes an exotic array of flavored coffees for customers to savor while ‘scantily clad’ foreign sluts perform some hard-to-swallow Deep Throat routines.

“Prices will be reasonable,” Pimpe continued, “with an iced macchiato plus three minute hand job topping the menu at twenty five quid.”
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2 Responses to “Monica Lewinsky Mulls $50,000 Fee To Inaugurate London’s Fellatio Cafe”

  1. Bargis

    Aug 4th, 2016

    Bet that place sucks!

  2. Philbert of Macadamia

    Aug 4th, 2016

    Blows ones mind too!

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