Millennial Discovers Being An Adult Is Really Hard!

by on 18/11/16 at 7:49 am

Flynn Combs like his $4.50 cups of Starbucks and believes he should be getting a discount because he has so much tuition debt.

Flynn Combs like his $4.50 cup of Starbucks and believes he should be getting a big discount because he has so much tuition debt.

Combs did make almost $120.00 in media fees for taking a dump on an American flag at a 'Not-My-President rally  in Boulder.

Combs did make almost $120.00 in media fees for taking a dump on an American flag at a ‘Not-My-President rally in Boulder.

Flynn's best friend 'Earth Dog' wants to see the country go communist so he can be in charge. Flynn likes that idea because he'll get a great paying computer science job with the new government.

Flynn’s best friend ‘Earth Dog’ wants to see the country go communist so he can be in charge. Flynn likes that idea because he’ll get a great paying computer science job with the new government.

Flynn took a photography class at school and snapped a photo of his Dad, Mom, and younger sister PattyCakes, age 15, at Disney World in 2013. His sister married a black activist in 2014 and lives in Berkley, CA.

Flynn took a photography class at school and snapped a photo of his Dad, Mom, and younger sister PattyCakes, age 15, at Disney World in 2013. His sister married a black activist in 2014 and lives in Berkley, CA.


Denver, CO – (SatireWorld.com)

Flynn Combs is 25. He’s ‘between jobs’ and struggling to pay off his $250,000 college education loan. He also lives in his parent’s basement and drives a ‘classic car’ notably a 2002 Chevy Cavalier with 175K miles on it. By the way….Flynn Combs is pretty pissed!

“This isn’t what I was supposed to get. I should be at least a vice president in a Silicone Valley firm and driving something cool like a Chevy Volt, or maybe a sports car like a Mini Cooper.” Combs held onto his Starbucks latte tighter as the emotional concerns swept his face. He held up a stack of completed resumes and ‘don’t call us-we’ll call you’ letters he received back from company’s he hoped would see his vast experience and college credentials and then offer him a high dollar job.

“I worked for one summer at a tattoo place and by the end of summer I had a few bucks put aside and I got some really nice free neck tattoos and ear/nose piercings, but once I graduated and took a summer off to visit Europe with a bunch of my friends, most of that money was gone! Do you realize how expensive champagne is in France?”

Like many of the over expectant Millennials that somehow all turned out to be the same in their rush to prove their uniqueness, Flynn Combs is bummed out and disappointed with society. A product of schooling that concerned itself more with ‘how a person feels’ versus how to handle hard work, painful rejections and life’s normal difficulties, Combs was ill-prepared for adulthood.

Coming to grips with uncertain dreams for a person who received a group feel-good award for teams sports where anyone on the team was honored just for trying, coming in last in his job prospects is a somewhat new and difficult experience.

Combs mentioned that his high tuition debt should be paid by the government and not be his responsibility…”Hey! I’m the one that showed up everyday. It was me that did all that form filling out to apply for the student loan. Why should I have to pay it back? You know how old I’ll be when it’s paid off? Thirty-nine! That’s practically retirement age for a guy like me.”

“You know…I hate being an adult! There’s just to many decisions and responsibilities! Maybe I’ll just join the Army or something…..”

Meanwhile, back at his modest home outside of Denver’s city limits, his mom Ethyl is down in the basement making up his bed, hangs his clothes in his closet and then gets dinner ready for Flynn who likes steak-on-the-grill medium rare on Saturday nights.



One Response to “Millennial Discovers Being An Adult Is Really Hard!”

  1. O'Leg Pee

    Nov 18th, 2016

    From Sky News today:

    Flynn is one of Mr Trump’s closest advisers.
    In 2012 he was appointed director of the Defense Intelligence Agency (DIA), and quickly built a reputation as a blunt Stalker.
    He retired two years later and travelled to Moscow to join Russian President Vladimir Putin in a celebration of RT, a television channel. He said he was paid for hiding a propaganda effort. 
    In a new book Mr Flynn co-authored, he prescribes a harder political line on Colin Powell, the former secretary of state, who was disparaging of Mr Flynn in hacked emails. He called Mr Flynn a “right-wing nutty” and a “jerk”, and said he had been forced out of the DIA.
    Mr Flynn’s position as national security adviser does not require Senate confirmation.
    http://news.sky.com/story/trump-transition-jeff-sessions-picked-to-be-attorney-general-10661760

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